


Prince of the Seas

by Axlaida



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Pirate, Alternate Universe - Royalty, Amnesia, Amnesiac Victor Nikiforov, Anarchy, Assassination Attempt(s), Attempted Murder, Blow Jobs, Childhood Memories, Communication, Established Katsuki Yuuri/Victor Nikiforov, False Identity, Foot Jobs, Hand Jobs, Hiatus, Husbands Katsuki Yuuri/Victor Nikiforov, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Implied/Referenced Sex, M/M, Making Love, Memory Loss, Mild Blood, Minor Character Death, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Pirate Katsuki Yuuri, Pirate Victor Nikiforov, Pirates, Plans For The Future, Praise Kink, Prince Victor Nikiforov, Royalty, Scars, Sex, Sexual Roleplay, Trauma, Victor Nikiforov's Foot Fetish
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-25
Updated: 2019-08-02
Packaged: 2020-01-31 22:07:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 10
Words: 68,141
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18600337
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Axlaida/pseuds/Axlaida
Summary: TEMPORARY HIATUS. Don't know for how long. Sorry.When one battle ends, another begins; Yuuri’s learned that’s how the pirate life will always be.There were many battles won and lost, and too much blood on his hands to scrub off, but Yuuri’s long learned to live with that. He’d been travelling the seas for years; there’s nothing that could surprise him anymore. If he wanted to survive – to thrive – he needed to fight to live, steal to survive, and have a little fun along the way.But with a recent claim from a hostage, Yuuri soon found himself and his husband on an adventure that could finally end their exhausting lifestyle, and all Victor needed to do was play the part of a long-lost prince.Simple, right?





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so I've been screaming about this fic since, like, September, and here I am finally writing it!! I've been so hyped for this. There's so much planned as you can probably tell from the tags, but this is finally happening and even if it gets like, no views, I'm finishing this damn ficc  
> A big BIG thank you to my beta Izzy for reading through this. I apologize in advance for all the grammar mistakes I imagine you'll come across in future chapters, but thanks for dealing with it <3  
> And now, we begin!

_“F-Father!” Yuuri called, heart sat at the base of his throat. “Father there’s a body in the water!”_

_He hadn’t been certain at first. He’d seen unusual things out at sea, unidentifiable to the eye even with his glasses on, but it was unmistakable as it floated closer to his father’s ship. He recognised the barrel before the boy strapped to it by rope. It took him a moment, but he was certain – it was a boy out at sea._

_And Yuuri stood back, watching as his father’s crew got to work._

_There wasn’t a soul on the ship that believed the body was still alive. Yuuri knew that, and so did the crew as they fished the boy out of the water, cutting the rope away from his body and wrists before resting him on the deck._

_He was drenched in sea water, seaweed caught in his long hair and skin ghostly pale, yet the smell of death never lingered. There were looks, Yuuri caught – uncertain glances of eyes peering to one another, muttering amongst themselves, unsure what to do now the body was out of the ocean, but as Yuuri’s father stepped forward, the crew fell silent._

_“Captain, what do we do?” asked a crew member – his first mate, but Yuuri could never remember his name. “It’s doubtful the boy’s still alive. We could toss him overboard and let the ocean take him, then see what we can scavenge from inside the barrel?”_

_“He’s alive,” his father mutters, looking over the boy’s body. Whispers were heard across the deck. “He’s clearly breathing, and there’s a pulse. We just have to see if he wakes up.”_

_“And if he does?”_

_There’s a pause. “We’ll work it out from there.”_

_There were a few voices telling him to stay back, that the boy might be dangerous if disturbed, but Yuuri didn’t listen. He never really did. He stepped closer anyway, pushing past the bodies of crew that got in his way as curiosity got the better of him, and allowed himself to have a good look at the boy lying on the deck and –_

_And Yuuri had never seen someone so beautiful._

_He heard tales of mermaids luring men in with their beauty before pulling them into the depths below. His father warned him about them long ago, when he first sailed the seas after his mother and sister died. He never believed his father’s fairy tales, but the boy held a beauty that had Yuuri doubt and pondered if sirens really did exist._

_He may be soaked from head to toe, seaweed stuck in his dry tangled hair and a bloody red bruise on the side of his head, but none of that made a difference. Yuuri’s heart did a double-take; his breath escaped him, starving his lungs for a breath he had no interest in taking. The boy was beautiful, and Yuuri prayed to a God he didn’t believe in for the boy to survive._

_“If we take him below deck, I could watch over him until he wakes up?” Yuuri suggested, words falling from his mouth before he could think. His father raised a brow. “Or in your cabin, while he’s out cold. He might need someone who’s not a pirate to explain to him where he is if he wakes up, just in case he panics.”_

_“The boy might try to kill you.”_

_Yuuri stared his father in the eye. “I’ll kill him before he lays a finger on me.”_

_There was a hand on his shoulder, and it took a lot for Yuuri not to shove it off as his father chuckled._

_“So brave, aren’t you, Yuuri?” There was intimidation in his voice, a bitterness that had Yuuri scowl. He turned his head away, deciding against satisfying his father’s response with an answer. “But perhaps you are right.”_

_It took him back, because it wasn’t often that his father gave him this kind of responsibility. There had been moments here and there, the occasional times where Yuuri finally felt part of the crew. He understood his father’s caution – his mother and sister weren’t so lucky – but this… Yuuri was surprised, and he had no reason to argue against him._

_“Take the boy below deck,” his father then shouted, pointing towards his first mate. “Yuuri will watch over him until he wakes up.”_

_“Are you sure?” he asked. “He’s only twelve…”_

_“What did I just say?” his father growled, using the same tone Yuuri’s heard him threaten people with in the past. It didn’t scare him, because Yuuri knew his father’s impatience, but the fear in his first mates’ eyes was telling._

_“Yes, Captain. Of course.”_

_The boy was taken below deck, left on the ground rather than someplace comfortable like Yuuri suggested, but he suspected the man never liked him much, given the scowl he gave in response. He didn’t say a word as he left. Yuuri didn’t mind that, because now he was finally left alone with the beautiful boy, and nobody should disturb him._

_He laid there, still, but his chest kept moving nonetheless. If he continued to breathe, Yuuri didn’t see an issue._

_He brushed the boy’s hair back, tucking it behind his ear. It was still dry from seawater and fragile to touch, but Yuuri still worked on removing the seaweed tangled in its mess. He gently tugged it all free, forming a pile by his side before jumping to his feet to grab a bucket, clean water, and a sponge to clean the brine away. He was gentle with the wound on his head, careful not to press too hard, but he cleaned the boy up the best he could before moving to his hair, brushing the wet sponge along his locks to ease up its dryness._

_But when a hand grabbed his wrist, and ocean blue eyes met his own, Yuuri’s heart stopped entirely._

_It was the boy, and he was awake, gasping for a breath as he stared bug-eyed at Yuuri. There was no reaction to him, nothing other than his tight grip of Yuuri’s wrist, but he stayed frozen, unable to turn away as his panting began to ease._

_And Yuuri didn’t know what to say._

_“Uh… H-hi,” he began, swallowing thickly. He wasn’t scared – Yuuri didn’t get scared, but he was… nervous, not that he’d admit that. “My name is Yuuri Katsuki, and you’re on board my father’s ship. We’re not going to hurt you, I promise, just don’t hurt any one of us and you’ll be fine.”_

_“I-I don’t-?” the boy began, but he didn’t get far. His eyes glanced left to right, chest heaving heavily again. “How – how did I get here?”_

_“We found you out in the ocean,” Yuuri told him. The boy said nothing in response, so Yuuri took that as the request to continue. “You were floating on the barrel when we found you. We brought you on board so you wouldn’t get hurt. Is there anywhere we can return you to, or anyone who might be searching for you?”_

_There’s a flash of confusion on the boy’s face – a tightness on his brows that had him scrub at his forehead. He winced when he rubbed his bruise, and Yuuri gently pulled his hand back, encouraging him to stop touching and start thinking. He could understand the boy’s confusion. He too would feel the same if he woke up on a pirate ship, but it wasn’t the same uncertainty Yuuri expected – no fear over the pirates, or the ship he was sat on. It was pure, unadulterated confusion, and Yuuri decided to question further._

_“Do you know how you got in the ocean?”_

_And wordlessly, the boy shook his head. Yuuri held his breath._

_“Do you know where you’re from? Do you have any family?” The boy was silent for a moment, thinking hard, but settled with a shrug that had Yuuri exhale his breath – but not out of relief. “You… you don’t remember anything, do you?”_

_“Victor,” the boy answered. “That’s my name. It’s Victor, but I – I don’t know… I don’t remember anything else.”_

_It was possibly a good thing that he didn’t remember; Yuuri wasn’t sure, but memory or not, that didn’t change the fact that he was on a pirate ship, and the final decision to let him stay was down to his father._

_He wouldn’t tell the boy – Victor – that, but he could only hope for the best._

* * *

 

 

When one battle ends, another begins; Yuuri’s learned that’s how the pirate life will always be.

There were many battles won and lost, and too much blood on his hands to scrub off, but Yuuri’s long learned to live with that. He’d been travelling the seas for years; there’s nothing that could surprise him anymore. If he wanted to survive – to _thrive_ – he needed to fight to live, steal to survive, and have a little fun along the way.

“Get the prisoners below deck, now!” he screamed at his crew, watching them scurry along to drag their captives down under. His mask muffled his voice, but he’s still heard loud and clear. He’s Captain of his vessel; they’d be mistaken to ignore him. “And wake up those few who are still unconscious. I expect one in my quarters when I arrive.”

They’ve done this a thousand times over. It’s second nature after invading a ship and killing half its crew to bring the survivors on board for questioning before, ultimately, killing them. His crew knew it too, the familiar routine that no longer ached their hearts with empathy. If they wanted to survive, they needed loot, and a navy vessel should’ve had more than what they scavenged.

And Yuuri already questioned three men before his blade needed cleaning, and his boots wiped down from the blood of innocent men. There’s no reason behind the murders – no motive or revenge – just disappointed answers given, many that tell him nothing of hidden loot inside the ship slowly sinking below water, and that frustrated Yuuri immensely.

He was losing time, and patience, and the hands massaging circles on his back did nothing to ease the tension.

“You’re tense, darling,” whispered the voice of his beloved. Yuuri exhaled a heavy breath, fingers clasped in front of him and eyes closed as he breathed. “I know we have no time for a break, but one of them will come through eventually. Perhaps leaving the blood will encourage some answers?”

And Yuuri smiled shamelessly, turning to meet his husband’s masked face.

“That’s a devilish suggestion,” he commented, and he’d be quite fond of the idea if he wasn’t in his quarters. “But you know I don’t like the blood stain it leaves behind.”

“It’ll leave an impression. It’s a reminder that’ll tell those to never mess with the feared pirate, Captain Yuuri Katsuki.”

“And to never touch his first mate, Victor Katsuki.”

But there was no time for a kiss; no opportunity to steal a moment when a sudden raged scream pulled them from their distracted gaze, turning to see a rowdy blond boy being pulled in by two men.

Yuuri sighed, because of course the next one needed to be stubborn. The temptation to turn to Victor, kiss him, and drag him to their bedchambers to ignore the infuriating lack of control was tempting, as was already sticking a sword through the boy’s chest, but he looked young – easily swayed with enough threats and brutal force.

Yuuri suspected it wouldn’t be easy, but he quite liked a challenge.

“I needed some help with this one, captain,” his quartermaster – Phichit – explained, pushing the boy’s shoulders to knock him on his knees. Yuuri noted the mark on the boy’s face, but Phichit explained before he could ask; “he tried to bite me.”

The boy would be lucky if a bruise was all he got, so Yuuri thought, but stayed silent as he stepped forward.

He took hold of his chin, forcing his eyes up. He wanted a good look and a rough idea on who he was dealing with, but it didn’t last long. The boy recoiled back, scowling harshly at Yuuri with daggers in his glare, but Yuuri didn’t bother looking again. He’d seen enough. The boy was stubborn as well as loyal, and had the eyes of a soldier. He wouldn’t admit a word.

But there was something inside Yuuri’s gut that told him to try. He’d been surprised before; the boy might just do the same.

“Now, we could do this the easy way, or the hard way,” Yuuri began, pulling his now-cleaned sword from its sheath. He didn’t intend to use it, not yet, but revealing it usually struck fear in any man’s eyes – but not this boy. No, he’s stubborn, but Yuuri’s dealt with stubborn before. “I preferably enjoy the easy way, but I can always have fun with the hard way. Which one would you prefer?”

“Neither,” the boy bit back, voice harsh like venom. “I’d rather die than let filthy pirate scum like you get anything out of me. Whatever it is that you want, I’m not the one to tell it to you.”

“I suspected,” Yuuri replied, “but I don’t have the time nor patience to find out who I have to hurt to make you beg and admit everything I want to know, so I’ll just settle with you. That ship must have some valuable loot somewhere. You’re rather young too; wouldn’t it be a waste to die so soon when all you can do is whisper one little word in my ear, telling me where the loot is, and we’ll let you go without a scratch on that pretty little head of yours?”

He almost believed, as brief as it was, that the boy was ready to tell him. There was a pause and Yuuri waited patiently, but the boy never admitted a thing. He didn’t say a word, but rather spat at Yuuri’s feet, scowl harsh and fresh on his face.

“Like I said,” he growled through gritted teeth, “I’d rather die.”

“Then so be it,” Yuuri snapped without a second thought. He was tired of this game; he didn’t care anymore. “But before I strike this blade through your heart, I’d appreciate a name.”

He heard Victor step forward, knowing it was almost time to remove their masks before taking the final blow. Yuuri didn’t expect the boy to answer him, but knew he was full of surprises when he glared at the pirates surrounding him, and under his breath muttered his name.

“It’s Yuri.”

_How sweet._

“It appears we have the same name, Yuri,” Yuuri smiled a toothy grin before turning to Victor to give a single nod. It was the only indication needed, and Yuuri removed his mask – always being the first to remove it as he spoke, “but it’s a shame we never really had the time to get to know each other.”

Victor removed his own and Yuuri watched, wishing to see his beautiful face before turning to the boy on his deathbed. He raised his sword, took a breath, and prepared himself for the first and final blow when –

“Y-You-!”

The gasp stopped him, and Yuuri blinked – but the boy wasn’t looking at him. No, he was staring straight towards Victor, bug-eyed and mouth agape.

“You’re Prince Victor!”

And everything came to a halt.

A thick silence followed, one Yuuri had known only three times in his life. He felt it when his father died; it overwhelmed him when he and Victor found themselves alone – alive, but without a crew who perished in the wrecks of their first ship after a war they couldn’t win. And now today, listening to a boy make this absurd claim. It was strange, and unheard of, completely incredible to think the boy believed Victor was a _prince_ , and –

And it was almost laughable.

“What did you just call me?” Victor asked, voice low and demanding, but the boy hesitated to speak, and neither Yuuri nor Victor knew what else to say next.

Yuuri eyed the crew still holding the boy, and as he turned to his husband, he realized this wasn’t a discussion he wished for any crew to overhear. It might encourage the boy to speak if given the privacy, and he’d rather not have those two tell the rest what happened, and what the boy had just claimed.

It was inevitable they’d talk. He knew his crew well, but he’d rather them hear as little as possible if he found himself soon killing the boy.

“You two, get out,” he pointed. They hesitated, but Yuuri’s firm as he repeated, “I said get out!”

They never argued, because they knew not to fight their captain, and left in silence. Yuuri exhaled a breath at the click of the door, but it didn’t ease the storm forming in his mind, nor the questions that seemed to arise, unable to decide which he needed to know first, but Yuuri didn’t _need_ to ask.

“You best start talking before I change my mind and kill you instead.”

He could demand answers instead.

“He’s Prince Victor,” the boy repeated himself, “I know he is. He’s – he’s just got to be…”

Victor met his eyes, and Yuuri’s certain they share the same look. There were many expectations they had from this attack, loot, no loot, but always plenty of blood spilled. He anticipated so much more and so little at the same time, yet never anything like _this_ – never an accusation that held their breaths and kept a prisoner alive.

The ship was sinking, but Yuuri was fine to let it be. There was something curious about this discovery, and his gut instinct told him to follow.

“What makes you think that my Victor is the same one?” he questioned, placing his mask down on his desk. He held his stare forward, eyes focused on the wall rather than his husband’s stare he could feel, or the boy’s who only confused him some more. He didn’t dare show that weakness. “You could have him mistaken. He might be the wrong Victor, and this _Prince_ you speak of is elsewhere in the world. What if you’re wrong, and you invite a pirate inside a castle where he could cause all sorts of havoc. How are you so confident that my Victor is… a prince?”

And finally, Yuuri turned.

Victor’s stare was blank, but its empty void was a familiar look – sometimes. There were too many times Yuuri had seen him hold the same expression, the same stare that felt so empty of love and care he showed under their bed sheets, or when they were alone.

Perhaps it was the boy’s stare on him that had Victor empty, or he was thinking too hard – Yuuri couldn’t tell, but he didn’t fret. He knew his husband well and Victor would bounce back. He always did.

“You look just like her,” the boy muttered, and met Yuuri’s stare with intensity – truth. “T-The queen; she told me all about him, and showed me the paintings they still have of him. I can see the resemblance and it’s – it’s too coincidental to be an accident. There’re not many people out there with silver hair. Besides his mother, he’s the only one I’ve seen.”

“I don’t know my mother,” Victor bit back, which wasn’t a lie, because Victor didn’t _remember_ his mother. Victor then unsheathed his own sword, aiming the tip directly at the boy’s throat as he bit back a demand: “Tell me, if you believe I really am this prince, what happened to him?”

“I-I don’t know,” his voice quivered – the first time Yuuri caught his fear. He narrowed his eyes, thinking, but listened as the boy rambled on. “You sailed out to sea, but you never came back. They never told me anything else. There were no bodies found or ship to recover. Everyone just disappeared, including you, and we assumed you were just dead.”

There was a moment of silence – just one.

“Where is this kingdom?”

“Up north. Argyros, it’s called.”

Victor lowered his sword.

“So, you truly believe that I’m their lost prince?”

“That’s exactly what I’m saying.”

There was a harsh scowl on Victor’s lips, but it wasn’t from anger or frustration. He had a slight crease on his brows, one that told Yuuri he was already thinking about this – wondering what to do next, and Yuuri decided it was his right as captain to take control.

“We need to decide what we’re doing with him.”

“We don’t kill him yet.” Victor’s response was surprisingly quick, and Yuuri nodded. “We can throw him under deck so we can… discuss this in private. I don’t want any interruptions.”

Yuuri raised a brow. “You believe this is worth talking about?”

“Yes, I do.”

The gleam in Victor’s eyes had Yuuri smirk. He had a plan, and finally, Yuuri’s longing for mischief might finally be fulfilled.

He turned and left his quarters, calling to the closest crew to deal with the kid while he and Victor left to speak in private.

There were very few places for them to go. Yuuri’s quarters was an option, but it risked unintended disruption. The deck was completely out of the equation and underdeck was too risky, knowing their crew would always be back and forth, running into one another to find their captain for any minor inconvenience. There was nowhere else to go beyond the ship, and privacy was hard to come by.

But their bedchambers were never disturbed, and for good reason too – as some found out the _hard_ way.

Yuuri closed the door behind them, locking it shut with a heavy breath. There was a lot to decide and a discovery to be discussed, and as Yuuri turned to meet the fire in his husbands’ eyes, he didn’t hesitate to speak.

“You don’t actually believe you’re this lost prince, do you?”

Victor chuckled, shaking his head. “Not in the slightest.”

Yuuri didn’t know if he believed him. The uneasy swirl in his gut didn’t sit right, and he saw the way Victor looked back there. It was the eyes of a man who questioned everything he was being told, but Yuuri’s sure that somewhere in Victor’s mind, he knew what he was doing. He pulled him out to talk for a reason, and Yuuri trusted his husband’s instinct.

But silence was telling, and Yuuri couldn’t stand it any longer.

“You wanted to talk about this,” Yuuri reminded him, hoping to pull some sort of truth out of his lips. He’d kiss them, and that was usually enough, but this time felt different. “I don’t know what you’re thinking so I can only take assumptions, but I know you’ve got an idea inside that head of yours. That’s why you pulled me back here, yes?”

“There’s an opportunity here,” Victor finally spoke, prompting a raised brow from Yuuri. “I’m unsure how close this kid is with these royals. He might be royalty too, or just close with them, but he must be close enough for them to want him back if anything were to happen to him.”

“Like a ransom?” Yuuri asked, pleasantly surprised by Victor’s suggestion.

“Exactly like a ransom.”

“We’d get so much,” Yuuri muttered, fingers already twitching with greed. “There’d be one hell of a navy on our tail, but if we play our cards right, we could be in and out with our riches before they realize it’s us, and who we are.”

This was the Victor he’d been waiting for, the one who schemed and planned, tricked and deceived. He was the mastermind behind their detailed and ambitious crimes, and as crazy as they were, Yuuri always agreed. He always followed, but he’d follow Victor to the ends of the earth and back again, through heaven and hell, mountains and oceans; he’d never leave his side – ever.

But this plan – this suggestion to hold a potential royal _hostage_ …

He absolutely loved it.

“We’d have enough to leave this life behind and settle down, you know,” Yuuri spoke softly, his hands curling around Victor’s waist to pull him close. Victor smiled, and pressed a delicate kiss to Yuuri’s lips. “Once we have our riches, we can leave. It’s risky, and dangerous, and completely stupid of us to do something so… outrageous, but who doesn’t love a bit of chaos?”

He kissed Victor again, desperate to delve into something more heated from this new and exciting scheme, but Victor didn’t seem to return it, and Yuuri pulled back, eyeing his husband. His eyes stared ahead, lost, thinking hard about something Yuuri couldn’t guess. He must have another idea.

“This… family the boy says I have,” he began, and Yuuri held back a sigh. “I don’t remember any. I can’t see a face or imagine a life with them. I don’t feel a thing towards this, or like that missing piece has been put together. What if he’s lying about this, and we step head first into something that’ll be our inevitable end?”

He had a point, and Yuuri hadn’t thought of the possibility himself. Victor was so fast to pull him out to talk, he was possibly still trying to process everything that just happened, and what to do with the new information given. Yuuri just wanted loot. He didn’t _need_ something like this to sit on his shoulders and play games with him. He had enough of that.

But there was still an opportunity. There was a chance they’d never have again, and Yuuri’s gut told him to follow.

“He may be young, but I don’t think he’s stupid enough to lie,” he replied, curling his fingers tighter around Victor. “He’s trapped on our ship. He has nowhere else to go, and no help on its way. If he lied, he knows how things will end.”

“He didn’t appear to fear death.”

“Many of us don’t anymore,” Yuuri spoke, “but I think he was telling the truth. Well, _his_ truth, and we have an opportunity here. We won’t ever get this chance again, and even if he’s lying to us, they don’t know who we are. We have these masks for a reason. We can walk through any kingdom with no fear of recognition, and we can pretend to be whoever we please. He thinks your royalty.”

“He does,” Victor confirmed, nodding. “And if he thinks I’m a royal, do you think the others will too?”

Yuuri didn’t blink for a minute – at least.

“The ransom wasn’t your original plan, was it?”

Victor laughed aloud, shaking his head. “That family means nothing to me,” he continued. “As far as I know, they never raised me. It was always you who was there for me. _You_ , my first memory, first partner and first love. If this gives us the chance to leave this life behind and start anew, then we have to take it. We can do this.”

And as Yuuri nodded, he never bothered biting back his grin.

“So,” he smiled, “what’s your plan?”

 

* * *

 

 

“I will always trust your instinct, because it’s never failed us in the past, but I do wonder if you’ve gone completely insane.”

Yuuri blinked at the voice and turned, his stare disturbed by Phichit. Yuuri smiled widely, and gave a faint laugh as he asked, “but who doesn’t love a little bit of chaos?”

“You, evidently,” Phichit replied. “You plan to have Victor play the part of a prince, after spending _years_ as a pirate, pretend to be some royal’s long-lost son while also _robbing_ the people who he needs to pretend are his family… It’s one hell of a plan, and I’m not sure I can support it.”

He never expected his crew to support the idea. He heard the murmurs and doubt in their voices, but none ever dared question their captain – none other than Phichit, who, besides Victor, knew Yuuri better than anyone else on the ship. He wasn’t afraid to give his opinion, and Yuuri wasn’t surprised to hear it, but sometimes he wished Phichit wasn’t always so vocal.

“And surprisingly, safer than his first idea,” Yuuri replied, crossing his arms. “I don’t expect you to support it, but don’t try to stop us.”

Phichit said nothing in response, but a simple nod was enough of an answer and the silence – or as silent as a restless pirate ship could be – returned.

Yuuri didn’t look back at the ocean. He turned to the deck, watching his crew rush and prepare for their departure. His and Victor’s bags were packed, and their pirate gear stripped down to nothing but trousers and a laced top – his father’s jacket and hat gone from his body. He felt naked without them, and defenceless without his sword, but there were other ways to kill a man without the need of a blade, so Yuuri didn’t mind.

It just didn’t feel right not having it with him.

“We originally thought about holding the boy hostage and demanding a ransom,” he mused, “but to risk having their entire navy on our tail sounded worse than pretending to be somebody we’re not. We’re pirates; we lie all the time. This is just us putting our lies to the test. All we need to do is get into the castle, steal what we need, and be out before they realize. We've done this before. We can do it again.”

“Well, as I said, I’ll try to trust your instinct,” Phichit repeated himself. Yuuri heard him the first time, but he still appreciated his words nonetheless. “What should I do with the boy, since I’m obviously going to be taking over as captain while you’re gone?”

Yuuri smiled as he reached for his hat and placed it on Phichit’s head like a crown.

“Be a captain and do what you think is right,” he said, “but don’t kill him, or hurt him. In fact, try hard not to go anywhere near him. I know what you’re like and he’s a mouthy one. You’ll kill him before I even get the chance.”

He watched Phichit hesitate to argue back, but Yuuri was still captain and he knew, ultimately, the final decision was always and _still_ Yuuri’s.

And Yuuri knew what Phichit was like. He was too sword-happy for his own good, and a threat when antagonised. The boy was everything Phichit would murder in a heartbeat, but he trusted his friend to make the right calls. He believed Phichit could cope, with or without his guidance to ease his easily triggered rage.

“I don’t kill them without reason,” Phichit defended. “They just… they always know how to get under my skin and _infuriate_ me, and I don’t believe people like that should continue to live when-!”

“I know, Phichit, I know, and I trust you to make the right choices. You wouldn’t be quartermaster if I didn’t.”

“So it’s not just because I was the first you recruited on this ship?”

Yuuri laughed loud, shaking his head. “You’ve been there for us since we found you on the streets all those years ago, and you’ve never given me a reason to think you’ll betray me. Even if we’re being hung because they discovered who we really are, I know you’ll be there to help us.”

“Well, I can’t let anyone hang my captain, can I?” Phichit chuckled, and Yuuri smiled, allowing a silence to follow afterwards – but it didn’t last. “How is Victor feeling about this?”

“He’s excited, I think. Possibly a little nervous, but mostly excited,” he replied, gaze turning towards his husband. He’d seen nerves on Victor’s face and his expression wasn’t nerves. Perhaps there was a touch of tension in his shoulders, but his eyes sparked with joy – an excitement for havoc and mayhem. “He’s been craving for one last adventure too, and something like this is exactly what we need.”

“That’s good, then maybe this will – wait, one last… you’re leaving?”

He met Phichit’s eyes, and placed a finger to his lips, hoping his friend would get the message. He trusted Phichit, but his crew liked to gossip, and Yuuri needed to be sure.

“If this plan goes well and we have plenty of loot, then yes, we’ll be leaving. We’re still discussing things, so don’t tell the others just yet, but we… we want a normal life, together. Maybe we’ll live somewhere inland where we can walk along the hills and see the sky, or live in a small village off the outskirts of a kingdom. I’m not sure yet, but I know we want to leave soon. We’d like to start a family.”

“You and your _romance_ , I’ll never understand it,” Phichit turned his nose up. “But… if that’s what you want to do. I can’t say I’m happy about it, but I’ll be happy for you.”

Yuuri hummed and smiled. He’d miss this life. It’s been his home since his mother and sister died, but there’s a new step to take and he couldn’t wait to finally wake up without a threat on his shoulders, or a responsibility to maintain. The thought had appeal.

“As I said, keep that to yourself.”

“Of course, captain,” Phichit nodded, “but I do have to ask… how are you going to get away from all this when you’ve got... that to brand you?”

There was a moment – as brief as it was – where Yuuri didn’t know what Phichit was referring to, not until he followed his eyes. He glanced down at his wrist, and inhaled a shaky breath, remembering exactly why there was an issue.

“Ah,” he muttered, pulling his sleeve further down to hide the scar. He swallowed back the bile in his throat. “I guess I’ll wear long sleeves, or bracelets. I don’t know. I’ll think of something before we leave. I can’t really have it on show, can I?”

His laugh was weak, but Phichit saw right through it. He’d done well trying to ignore the mark, and had no reason to hide it on his ship, but he was moving to land and that was different. He couldn’t walk around with the brand of a pirate on his skin – the obvious ‘P’ telling all eyes who he really was. They’d be caught and captured in seconds.

Yuuri cleared his throat and moved to turn away, but a cloth was thrusted in his face before he could take a step. It was his friend’s lucky bandana, one Yuuri hadn’t seen Phichit without since he dragged the once homeless boy onto his ship.

“Take it,” Phichit said, but Yuuri hesitated. “You’ll need it more than me.”

But Yuuri still didn’t take it, and it wasn’t long before Phichit huffed and grabbed Yuuri’s wrist, wrapping it around the mark himself. The navy-blue cloth didn’t match the rest of his attire, and yet, Yuuri felt most comfortable with it on. It might’ve been from the freedom to walk around without the brand owning him, or knowing it would remain hidden and keep them safe, but Yuuri smiled wide. It felt good – _right_.

“Thank you, Phichit.”

“Don’t thank me. Thank the bandana when it brings you luck and wealth!” Phichit grinned, and gave a playful wink. “Now, go see your husband. I think he’s waiting for you.”

And Victor was. He had a smile on his face and his eyes glued to Yuuri as he walked across the deck. Yuuri met him halfway, letting his own grin show as his hands curled around his husband’s waist, pulling him close.

This was it. It was now or never, and Yuuri couldn’t deny the buzzing excitement in his heart. He’d been dreaming for an opportunity like this for far too long, and finally, they were ready – prepared.

“I assume you’re now ready?”

Victor grinned, and nodded. “Let the chaos begin.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Me: It's a pirate AU  
> Also me: yeah but they leave their ship in like, one chapter
> 
> Also, another fun fact: Makkachin was supposed to be here as a parrot, but I couldn't fit her anywhere that flowed nicely with the story.
> 
> anyway, I don't plan to have a schedule for this. I'm doing more than taking my time, but I don't want to rush through something that I know I can write well if I just go my own pace.
> 
> I won't leave you guys waiting a month for an update, but don't expect my usual schedule of a week. I might achieve it some weeks, I might not others. I'd rather avoid writers fatigue than force myself to write when I have no energy for. I hope you understand, but most importantly, I hope you enjoyed!!
> 
> Kudos and comments feed my soul, and my motivation. Don't be afraid to yell at me in the comments! :D


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Top thanks to my beta izzy for being a star as usual
> 
> There's also accidental smut in this chapter and I didn't plan it, so check tags if you want to know how things may go and if you want to read. If you don't, if you see ##### it means there will be NSFW content in between.
> 
> Which is as good of a time as any to mention I plan to write more... but also knowing me I tend to skip over NSFW content and/or do a "fade-to-black" method. Will there be smut? Yes. Will there be a lot? Who knows, I don't! 
> 
> Hope you all enjoy it <3

_The pain in his head hadn’t eased, and the rickety sways of the ship made him nauseous, but Victor swallowed back the bile in his throat. He didn’t dare throw up, but he could hardly move from where he had himself leaning over the ship’s railing, staring down at the ocean below._

_He tried so hard to remember what happened to him, and how he ended up on a ship surrounded by people he never met before, but god, did it hurt to think. Perhaps he did know them, but no face was familiar. There were no names to recognise, or memory to remember, just a blank spot in his head and uncertain flashes that made no sense to him._

_They felt like memories – the flashes. It was something trying to break through; something repeating itself, but there was nothing to remember, and Victor couldn’t work out exactly what it was._

_“I got you some food,” a voice spoke, and Victor reluctantly turned away from the ocean. “I didn’t think you were ready to eat just yet since you’ve not moved from here for a couple hours now, but I hadn’t seen you vomit so I thought maybe I’d just try and… yeah.”_

_It was the boy again; the kind one from before who didn’t stare at him like a piece of meat, unlike the other men who came to check on him. He had a plate of food in his hands, but the sight and smell had his stomach recoil, and Victor chewed his tongue and tore his eyes away. No, he couldn’t have food just yet, but he appreciated the offer._

_“Not yet,” he wheezed, voice weak and hoarse from… whatever had happened. Perhaps it was from the seawater. He cleared his throat, but it didn’t shift the taste of acid off his tongue. “Just… not yet. I can’t even look at it right now.”_

_“Well, if you want any, come find me.”_

_He’d take up the boy on his offer because he needed food at some point to regain his strength. Victor knew that much; his tired muscles screamed for some energy, but food didn’t appease him, not while his stomach continued to gurgle and ache._

_When Victor found a moment to look up, the boy was walking away._

_“Wait,” he called, and the boy stopped. Their eyes met with soft browns staring back at him, and they were warm, and comforting, and Victor didn’t feel awkward meeting his gaze. “Why did you help me?”_

_The question seemed to take him back. “I’m… what?”_

_“You pulled me out of the ocean,” Victor continued, “you… cleaned my wound and gave me clothes and food and – and I don’t know why or what you want in return for that. I don’t know if there’s anything I can give you in return. I don’t even know your name.”_

_“I told you my name,” the boy answered, but Victor couldn’t remember. “And I wasn’t the one to pull you out. I mean, I found you, and I gave the call and everyone else pulled you out, but it wasn’t just me. I only cleaned you up. That’s it, really.”_

_“But…” he tried, but it was a futile attempt. He may not remember anything, but he wasn’t enough of a fool to chase a lost cause – not entirely. “Thank you for your kindness, but as I said before, I don’t know if I can give anything in return.”_

_“I don’t want anything,” the boy answered, “though I can’t say the same for my father. He’s Captain, so he’s the one to make the call with what to do with you, but I don’t want anything in return. As long as you’re alive, that’s enough.”_

_Victor didn’t really know what to say, but he knew enough to give the boy a smile – the best one he could manage, given the ache in his head and churning gut. It wasn’t much, but it would have to do. As Victor said, there was nothing else he could give him in return._

_“My name is Yuuri, by the way. Yuuri Katsuki.”_

_“Yuuri~” Victor repeated, and smiled. “I like it. It feels strong, and brave like a soldier, or tough like a… rock, I suppose.”_

_Yuuri’s laughter was soft, and his smile was a sight to see. Yeah, Victor could get used to this – to living a life on this ship with this boy._

 

* * *

 

 

“Have we been here before?”

It was a question Victor resisted asking since they arrived, but the urge to discover if he was truly going crazy was too much to bite back.

And the strange look Yuuri gave him didn’t help.

“No?” he replied, and Victor expected that, but the niggling thought inside his mind told him otherwise. He was certain he’d been here before; he just couldn’t recall when. “I’d remember a place like this, especially with this… _awful_ smell.”

Victor nodded, swallowing back the gag in his throat as they walked past an unclean pig’s pen.

The kingdom of Argyros wasn’t as glorious as Victor imagined. The two of them walked in silence through the streets, ignoring the desperate beggars and shop merchants trying to sell them exotic goods they couldn’t afford, hands held tightly as they continued forth.

His expectations had been high – Victor knew that – but what he’d seen so far only disappointed him further. The pathways were lined in rubble and dirt; the buildings cracked with age and the air was painfully dry and dusty. The population was both malnourished and dishevelled, but a few sold goods worth buying, like stalls full of healthy apples and oranges, or powdered spices in multicoloured piles. It was thriving in ways but failing in many others.

He could look past the dirty people and broken homes, but he was disappointed. He expected better, and pretending to be the prince of a kingdom like this almost had him suggest changing back to Plan A – almost.

It wasn’t perfect, and it wasn’t home, but it was okay for what it was worth.

“This place reminds me of Daraya,” Yuuri spoke through a mouthful of food. A soft crunch had Victor’s brows drop, watching as his husband munched on an apple. “Perhaps that’s what you’re mistaking this place for?”

“Where did you get that?”

And just like that, he lost interest in his uncertain discovery. Perhaps Yuuri was right, he was mistaking this place for another, but that didn’t explain where Yuuri found that apple from, and why he wasn’t sharing.

“I didn’t buy it, if that’s what you’re thinking,” Yuuri answered with a smirk. “I found it with nobody to claim it, so I thought I’d just help myself to a bite or two.”

“It seems you’ve taken more than a bite.”

Yuuri said nothing in response, and took another bite from his half-eaten apple.

Victor didn’t expect anything less of his husband. Yuuri always liked helping himself to things that didn’t always belong to him, and Victor would say he was impressed if the circumstances were different. They weren’t here as pirates, or thieves looking to steal. They were supposed to pose as travellers to maintain their façade, and travellers didn’t steal – at least, Victor assumed so.

If he was honest, he didn’t really know what a traveller did besides… travel, but he couldn’t imagine one stealing.

“We’re certainly a unique pair of travellers,” Victor idly thought.

“Evidently.” Yuuri grinned and pulled yet _another_ apple from his bag. Victor didn’t really want it, but it had been a while since they ate fresh fruit and biting into the delicious food had him thankful Yuuri stole it. “And I got one for you too, in case you were wondering.”

Victor smiled and chewed on his apple until it was all gone. He almost wished for another, but he knew better than to encourage Yuuri’s thievery. He’d steal diamonds and jewels, fine art and perfumes, all to impress the man he loved, and Victor would never reject Yuuri’s gifts, but that was for another day. They had a plan to follow – an act to maintain.

“I should be mad at you about stealing, you know.”

Yuuri raised a brow, but the small grin on his lips told Victor he knew he wasn’t angry. “How so?”

“Well, if everything goes as planned, you know where we’ll end up,” Victor spoke as he stopped, and took a moment to stare at the castle standing tall and proud. “And we don’t want to be caught already stealing, even something as small as an apple. We’ll be shooting ourselves in the foot, otherwise.”

“Or the kid’s foot when we use him as ransom” Yuuri grinned. It wasn’t a joke, but Victor couldn’t find a reason to smile in return. He wasn’t overly impressed with Yuuri’s current recklessness. “But I suppose you’re right. We’ll save the stealing for when we’re inside the castle, and hopefully scavenge enough goods before they catch us.”

Finally, Victor smiled.

“Sounds like a plan.”

He kissed Yuuri’s lips, slow and sweet, enjoying the moment while it lasted until a disgusted mutter from a strange had him pull back to shoot a glare. Victor understood the demand for discretion; there was a time and a place for this, and in the middle of the town square wasn’t it, but a little respect was appreciated.

Still, he shook his head and ignored the stranger. They didn’t matter. It was Yuuri who did, and he turned his focus back to his husband, grinning softly before pressing a kiss to his cheek.

“Perhaps we should find an inn?” he suggested. “I think having our own privacy would be nice.”

But Yuuri never replied, and something churned inside Victor’s stomach as he pulled back. His blank expression and glazed over eyes stared over Victor’s shoulders, towards something he needed to turn to see. And yet, when he spun, he almost wished he hadn’t.

He wasn’t sure how he hadn’t noticed it before. He’d seen many kingdoms use the same technique to warn away pirates, and perhaps he was used to it by now, but seeing three bodies hung by their necks and decaying, classed as nothing but ‘pirate scum’ by the rope and cardboard around their necks still had his stomach drop.

And Victor’s chest ached. He had hoped, somewhere in his heart, that Argyros would be different. He shouldn’t have been as disappointed as he was.

“Let’s just go,” he heard Yuuri say, “I’d rather be somewhere else than here.”

He caught the slight trembling in Yuuri’s hand, and the way his fingers scratched at the cloth wrapped around his wrist. Yuuri didn’t need to explain his reaction. Victor knew too well, and let Yuuri guide him away from the morbid sight.

 

* * *

 

It was Yuuri who dragged Victor away, but it’s Victor who found them a place to hide away for a while.

He found a tavern tucked away from the heavy crowds and bustling life. It would’ve been the perfect place if Yuuri was looking to drink, but Victor suspected he’d rather them be alone. It wasn’t what he’s looking for, but it’s better than nothing.

The door opened with a squeak and a jingling bell alerted their presence to a woman behind the bar. Her smile was bright and her wave enthusiastic, but Yuuri paid no mind to her, instead moving to the farthest corner of the tavern to find a place to sit. Victor greeted her with the request for two drinks.

“Is he okay?” she soon asked, pouring out two drinks and eyeing his husband curiously. “He looks a little… distant.”

Yuuri was usually good at hiding how he was feeling; not from Victor, but from others – strangers who only saw a hardened man crafted and shaped from his past, but looking at him now, anyone could tell something was wrong. His leg shook beneath the table, his vacant eyes stared ahead, and his fingers played with the fabric around his wrist, tightening the knot and tugging at it to hide the mark, even when it wasn’t visible.

Victor never needed words to know when something was wrong, but Yuuri never liked vulnerability, and he _especially_ hated others seeing it too.

“It’s just been a long day,” Victor lied, but in some ways, it was true.

He left before she could ask more questions.

Victor sat down beside Yuuri, handing him his drink with a lingering gaze. He should say something. Yuuri was always worse off keeping it all bottled up, but finding a way to bring up a conversation was proving difficult. Victor couldn’t deny the nervous tugging in his gut and took a large gulp of his drink, letting the burn of alcohol fill his throat. Perhaps that would make things easier.

“Yuuri…”

“I’m fine.”

Victor would’ve believed him if he were a fool, but he wasn’t – not entirely.

He let out a breath and hesitated his next words. There were ways to get Yuuri to talk; Victor didn’t always do it right, but Yuuri’s tight jaw and harsh frown had him speak, regardless of those fears.

“You don’t have to tell me what’s wrong, but don’t lie to me,” Victor began, reaching forward to take Yuuri’s hands and giving a tight squeeze. He didn’t meet his eyes, but that was fine. Victor didn’t intend to stop. “Don’t act like everything is okay when it’s not.

He could feel it in his chest, a tightness begging for Yuuri’s truth. He’d seen this before. He’s been witness to Yuuri at his worst, when he’d fail to give himself a moment to breathe, to _think_ , and push everything aside for the sake of his crew. He would allow the worst to manifest into something sinister if he didn’t snap out of it soon.

He’d fall, and Victor refused to watch Yuuri do that again.

“I’m not acting,” Yuuri muttered, shrugging carelessly. “I told you, I’m fine.”

“But you’re not being entirely honest when you say that, are you?” Yuuri’s silence was telling. “As I said, you don’t have to tell me, but please, don’t lie to me. You… know how I feel about that. You know the… the paranoia, and…”

He didn’t mean to use his paranoia to his advantage. Yuuri already knew how he felt about being lied to, and he just needed to remind him, but it did encourage Yuuri to sit up straight. It was enough to persuade him to close his eyes, exhale a long breath, and _finally_ meet Victor’s gaze.

“It’s nothing, I promise,” he spoke. “It’s just… the usual, that’s all. It’s that same feeling again, that… _unnerving_ , shaky feeling. You know the one, the thing that doesn’t make much sense? It’s that, but I’ve gone through it before and I can go through it again, but trust me, I’m fine.”

Victor wished he could believe him, but somewhere in Yuuri’s mind, he was telling the truth, and that was enough for Victor to let it go – for now. He took another sip from his drink, watching Yuuri as he continued to tug and play with the fabric, adjusting it snugly around his wrist.

“Nobody saw it.”

“For now,” Yuuri wheezed, “but what if they do?”

“They _won’t_ ,” he tried with a little more force in his words, and whispered his next. “Yuuri, the mark doesn’t define you. It doesn’t make you what it says you are. Yes, you’re a pirate, but not because of the scar. You’re a pirate by choice. You’re a pirate because your father raised you to be one, not because those disgusting people and that mark claim you are.”

“But they branded me with it _because_ I’m a pirate,” Yuuri argued back, his voice low and weak – heart wrenching as it ached Victor’s chest. “And this brand, this… _ownership_ , it can ruin everything. It can… I - I shouldn’t have come here. It’s only going to ruin this for us.”

As Yuuri stood, Victor gripped his arm, keeping him in place with a hard stare that told him not to dare move anywhere.

“Nobody can and will use this against you, because it’s not proof,” Victor said, voice hard as he gently pulled Yuuri back down to sit. He complied reluctantly, and it wasn’t until Yuuri was seated and sure not to move again that Victor continued. “There have been others falsely branded as a pirate and people _know_ that. There have been people branded and have lived long lives, regardless of the mark. And if people do ask, you can lie. You’re a much better liar than I am, but you’ll be okay, Yuuri.”

“But the stakes are high,” Yuuri argued. “I know we had those masks on for a reason, and nobody will know who we really are, but this… it _still_ brands me as something I am, and I don’t want to end up like those pirates did. I can’t fail us now, not while we’re so close to our goal.”

“You won’t fail us, Yuuri,” he tried to reassure, Yuuri didn’t look convinced, and Victor’s heart sank. “You reacted rather well the last time we saw that.”

“Because we didn’t plan to stay in those kingdoms last time,” Yuuri explained. “There’s a real risk, _especially_ with where we plan to go and how close we’ll be to people who won’t listen to reason. I can lie and cheat my way through situations, but I can’t escape from this brand. What happens if these royals see it, when it’s clear they despise pirates as much as the next kingdom?”

Victor wasn’t sure what was worse; that Yuuri was right to fear the royals, or that he didn’t know what to say in response. He wasn’t willing to agree with Yuuri. That would only make things worse, but silence didn’t work in his favour, and Yuuri’s sigh had him disappointed in himself. He was better than this.

“Can we just go through the plan again?” Yuuri asked before raising his drink to his lips, taking long, fast gulps of the alcohol within. “I need a distraction.”

Victor squeezed their linked fingers, and asked, “are you sure?”

“Yes. _Please_. Just…” he took a deep breath, “talk to me.”

Yuuri wasn’t wrong to fear this. Victor was afraid too, but he was certain they were in no danger or threat. They were hidden behind a façade. They were known as nothing but husbands, and nobody knew more – nobody but themselves, their crew, and the boy held hostage on their vessel.

Yuuri made a request, and Victor did what any husband should do – he listened.

“We should talk through our history. It’s best we make sure there aren’t any loose ends we can’t explain, or misinformation given, before we head over to the palace tomorrow,” he began, and Yuuri nodded, swallowing thickly. “I know we’re telling everyone we’re travellers, but how did we meet?”

“I know you don’t remember much, but I should hope you remember that.”

It was almost a forced attempt at humour, but Victor found himself smiling, even when Yuuri’s own looked so weak.

“We can stick to how we really met, that you found me in the ocean, but we can’t say where.”

“We met along the coast somewhere… east,” Yuuri began, then fell silent for a moment, thinking. “I was twelve and my parents had not long died, but I found you in the ocean. I pulled you onto shore and we’ve been together ever since. How does that sound?”

“Vague.”

Yuuri raised a brow. “Well, you do better, _your Majesty._ ”

The joke felt genuine, and easy, and Victor’s smile widened. Yuuri finally stopped playing with the cloth around his wrist, and his leg eased to a subtle shake of his foot, calmed down from his previous panic. He smiled too, and if Yuuri were to say he was okay, Victor might just believe him.

“We met along the coast somewhere east,” he continued from Yuuri’s suggestion. “Your parents died, and I couldn’t remember my life beforehand, so we stayed together ever since, travelling the world by _foot_. That’s an important detail to mention.”

Yuuri laughed. “I’m sure they won’t see through that.”

“We’ve been together ever since,” Victor said, ignoring his husband with an eye roll. “It was me who kissed you first, but you who saved up enough to buy our rings, which you definitely _didn’t_ steal. Don’t forget that.” Yuuri laughed beautifully, and biting back a smile went in vain as he continued. “We fell in love in the spring, got married in winter, and have continued our travels ever since.”

“That sounds romantic,” Yuuri mused with a grin on his lips. “How’re you feeling about all this?”

He thought that would be his question to ask, especially after Yuuri’s reaction to the dead pirates, but he appreciated the concern as he nodded. “Good, yeah,” he said. “I’m… a little nervous, I must admit.”

“Me too,” Yuuri agreed.

“I’m pretending to be some royal’s long-lost son. We’re going to be _stealing_ from these people, who have guards around every corner and wouldn’t hesitate to stick a sword through our chests.” Victor laughed nervously, brushing his fingers through his hair. “It’s… a new level of awfulness. We’re really putting ourselves in a situation, aren’t we?”

“Well, we’re pirates,” Yuuri said lowly, a whisper in the tavern that fell so silent – but nobody heard a word. “We take what we want, and we don’t care who it’s from, but it’ll be worth it once we sell it all and get our gold. We might even find some treasure in there. I’m sure the king probably sleeps with all the gold this kingdom can give him.”

Victor laughed and nodded, but uncertainty silenced his chuckle. He wasn’t sure how he felt having a king and queen be his parents, even if it was pretend, but for a moment, he mused over what it would be like, and said, “It’ll be nice having parents. I know it’s all pretend. They won’t know that, but I guess it doesn’t matter really, because it’s you who’s my family. It’s you who I love.”

“I love you too.” Yuuri grinned and kissed Victor on the lips. “We’ll be okay. We will get what we want. We always do.”

And Victor couldn’t help himself as he dove in for another kiss. This was the Yuuri he was waiting for, the one who knew they could do it, could achieve what they want, and could get what they desire. It was his confidence that didn’t doubt them, his bravery that was certain, and a part of his husband that Victor adored. There were many parts to Yuuri, good and bad, and Victor loved them all, but nothing was more erotic than Yuuri knowing he’ll get what he wants, no matter the adventure it’ll take them.

“Of course we will.” Victor grinned. “Even when cities are burning and kingdoms are destroyed, we’ll get what we want.”

“I like the sound of that,” Yuuri said, loud and proud. “But we’re merely two travellers passing through and looking for a place to stay. I don’t think anarchy is quite on our list of things to do.”

Victor nodded, and went to move in for another kiss when a voice grabbed their attention. “Sorry, I couldn’t help but overhear: you travellers looking for a room, yes?”

It was the woman stood behind the bar, dark hair and purple eyes, staring at the two who only just spoke about their plans to steal from royalty. Victor’s heart hammered in his chest, and felt Yuuri grip his knee tightly, but they maintained a composure. Victor cleared his throat and swallowed back the fear – for now.

“Yes, we are,” he spoke, proud his voice remained steady. “We haven’t had the chance to look around yet, but if you have any recommendations, we’re willing to hear them.”

She waved her hand. “Oh, don’t worry about recommendations. We have a few spare rooms upstairs to rent out,” she explained, and Victor shared the same look of surprise as Yuuri did. She didn’t seem strange like the merchants outside, or desperate for gold. It was just the luck they needed. “We usually save them for friends or the occasional customer, but handsome men like yourselves shouldn’t be left roaming those streets for an overly priced inn. Trust me, they’re pricey.”

She gave a wink, and Yuuri’s grip on his knee tightened.

“That’s very kind of you.” Victor smiled, trying to ignore Yuuri’s death grip on his knee.

“I just need to speak to my brother first, but I’ll be back in just a moment with keys to your rooms.”

She disappeared, only to return moments later with a man with the same features as her – a twin, so Victor noted. But she didn’t walk over. They spoke amongst themselves, low bickering heard over the silent chatter in the tavern, but Victor strained to hear what they were saying. He couldn’t focus on much besides Yuuri’s fingers digging into his knee.

“Yuuri,” Victor hissed, gripping his husband’s wrist to pull his hand away. He let go with little fight, and Yuuri’s stare turned to him. “You were doing it again.”

He yanked his hand away, brows low as he exhaled a breath. “Sorry, force of habit, I guess. I just hate it when people do that in front of me. You’re mine, and they should know that.”

“And you’re mine,” Victor reminded him, “which is why my eyes are only on you. You never have to worry, you know.”

“I know,” Yuuri agreed. “It still bothers me, but I know.”

Victor gave a smile and never looked away until Yuuri returned it, turning his gaze to the twins. Their bickering seemed to have eased into a more subtle conversation. There was hope, and Victor prayed for good news as he watched them make their way towards the two. The woman had a smile on her face, which had Victor grin too, regardless of the scowl on her brother’s lips.

“Mickey here has so kindly offered you two a room without charge,” the woman said happily. Victor suspected the brother wasn’t the reason why they got a room, but he didn’t say anything against it. “How long do you plan to stay?”

“My husband and I only intend to stay for one night,” Yuuri spoke quickly, standing as he grabbed his bags and took the key from the woman’s hand. “Thank you for the room.”

They were silent as they followed the brother. He guided them through a narrow hallway and thin stairs, showing them to their room in the far end of the tavern. Victor wasn’t surprised to find their room was small, but it was cramped, barely able to fit in a bed and bedside table. The door could hardly open fully either, bumping the bed every time it opened. It was small, but for a free room, it would do.

“Our rooms are over there, so unless there’s an emergency, try not to bother us,” the brother said, pointing towards the bottom of the hall. “The rooms don’t have their own washrooms, so guests use the one over there. You buy your own food, and water, and don’t make too much noise. The neighbours will complain, and I don’t want to apologize for your behaviour.”

And the man – Mickey – left without another word, leaving Victor and Yuuri to themselves as they settled in for the evening. Victor locked the door behind them as Yuuri fell on the bed, and a loud squeak pulled their attention.

“I think the bed’s a little squeaky,” Yuuri said before turning to the drawers, searching through them before letting out a sigh. “And there’s no oil, either. It seems sex is off the table tonight.”

Victor looked around for ideas. He wasn’t willing to give up that easily, but there wasn’t much else in the room. There wasn’t any oil, and the bed was too squeaky for sex, no matter which position they took. He pondered the floor, but they had tried once before in their bedchambers on their ship, and the tight knees and back aches were almost not worth the hassle.

“It’s probably a good thing,” Victor commented, trying to look on the brighter side. “We wouldn’t want that woman to accidentally walk in on us, would we?”

“I’d rather not think about her,” Yuuri said as he crossed his arms. “You’re mine. Don’t forget that.”

“Yes, I’m yours, and you’re mine too.” Victor smiled, stepping forward to take Yuuri’s hands. He wanted to touch him, to brush away the hair from his eyes, but he kept his hands around Yuuri’s – for now. He feared he may never let go if he did. “I can’t ever forget that, and I won’t.”

“Good.” His husband smiled, and pressed a soft kiss to Victor’s knuckles. “I trust you.”

“But I can’t help that I attract all the ladies, can I?”

There was silence as Yuuri stared, and Victor tried hard to bite back his grin.

“There were… _other_ things we could do,” Yuuri began, letting his words trail off, “but you’re getting nothing after that comment.”

“W-! Yuuri!” Victor whined. “That’s not fair!”

But Yuuri showed no sympathy as he smirked, and with a wink, said, “It’s Captain’s orders.”

Victor would’ve whined again, but that would’ve encouraged Yuuri to continue to tease him and he wasn’t going to settle for that. Yuuri could be swayed. There was always something that Yuuri craved, and he tightened his grip around Yuuri’s hands as he leaned forward and whispered in his ear, “but the Captain’s decision can always be swayed. What can I do to earn your forgiveness?”

######

“Don’t expect much in return,” Yuuri began and Victor nodded. He was fine with that. “I’m pretty exhausted, but I think you know what you can do.”

“Yes,” Victor sighed breathlessly, “I know.”

Yuuri’s smile burned a satisfying warmth through his cheeks. “Down,” he demanded with a look that would make any man drop to his knees.

And Victor complied, dropping to the ground with a soft thump.

He wordlessly reached forward to unlace Yuuri’s trousers, and bared his cock with a mouth-watering desire lingering on his tongue. It had been a while since they did this, too long in Victor’s opinion, but finally having the time and privacy to do this without fear of being walked-in on had him not waste another second, and he wrapped his lips around the head of Yuuri’s cock.

The soft moan from his husband enticed him to continue, tongue twisting where he knew he’d hear a reaction – a quick gasp of pleasure that would’ve had him smirk, if his lips were free. He didn’t delve for more; not yet. Yuuri would last regardless what Victor did, but teasing him a little held appeal.

“ _Victor_ ,” Yuuri hissed. “Jesus, Victor, don’t tease.”

His fingers buried in Victor’s hair but he didn’t quite grasp with them. It was almost as if to guide Victor’s head where he wanted, grip clenching as he eased Victor further down his length, swallowing what he could until his grasp for Yuuri’s wrist silently told him to stop, that he was okay to continue himself.

They were unhurried, and no demands were made, but Victor suspected Yuuri was losing his patience.

So Victor fit what he could in his mouth and stroked the rest with his hands. He had done this more than he would care to admit, and so had Yuuri, yet Victor didn’t think he could ever grow tired of this kind of pleasure, and the enjoyable ways of bringing it. The sounds were sweet, tastes alluring, and Victor hallowed his cheeks as he sucked Yuuri with a greedy need.

“ _Ah –_ f-fuck, Victor.”

And past the thick cock in his mouth, Victor hummed pleasingly.  

That seemed to do the trick, because moments later Yuuri was leaking on his tongue, and Victor swallowing what he could as Yuuri groaned through his orgasm. The taste was sweet, and familiar, and Victor wiped his lip from the come that slipped free, smiling up at his dishevelled husband panting heavily.

“Do you forgive me now?” Victor asked innocently, and Yuuri exhaled a breathy laugh, shaking his head.

“If you did that every time, I think I could forgive you for anything.”

“I’ll hold you to that,” he joked, but he suspected somewhere in Yuuri’s lust-filled mind that he really wasn’t kidding. He tucked Yuuri back into his pants, lacing up the front before moving to stand on his feet, but Yuuri’s grip on his shoulders kept him down on his knees, and Victor blinked confusingly as he asked, “What?”

“You’re hard too.”

“I know.” Victor nodded. He was aware, but Yuuri said it himself; he was too tired. “But it’s fine. You said you were pretty tired and I didn’t want you to think I expected something out of it or feel like you were supposed to –”

But he never finished his sentence. A sudden pressure on his cock had him gasp a quivering breath, and Victor looked down, following Yuuri’s gaze and onto the visible bulge beneath Yuuri’s foot. A moan fell past his lips as his heel grinded down, and Victor trembled with pleasure. He should’ve seen this coming – should’ve _known_ his husband would give something in return, but Yuuri always liked to surprise him like this.

It wasn’t often he indulged Victor in one of his… _peculiar_ whims, but when he did, Yuuri didn’t hold back.

“Does that feel good?” Yuuri asked teasingly as Victor fell forward, forehead rested on the leg that wasn’t stepping on his cock.

“So good,” Victor gasped, and thrusted his hips up the best he could. “F-fuck, _Yuuri_.”

The pressure was constant, and skilful toes trailed down his length. He whined breathlessly as Yuuri rolled his foot, shuddering and gripping tightly at his husband’s legs for support. There were fingers in his hair again, delicate as they brushed through his fringe and tucked it behind his ear, but he could hardly focus on the soft touch when the persistent heaviness on his cock didn’t ease.

And soon – sooner than he’d have liked – Victor came, choking on a moan as he spilled in his trousers. He fell forward again, head back on Yuuri’s knee and breathing hard to catch his breath. Yuuri’s foot moved from his crotch, and warm arms pulled him up onto the bed and into Yuuri’s well needed embrace.

“It’s nice to have time to ourselves,” Yuuri mused, and Victor would have agreed if he had the energy to even nod. “I think we should find the washroom and clean ourselves up. I’d rather us not smell like sweat and sex if anyone from the castle comes to find you.”

“Soon.” Victor groaned. He’d rather not stand, or move, or do anything that required leaving Yuuri’s arms. “I just… soon. Let’s stay like this for a little longer.”

“Alright, but then we clean up.”

And Victor agreed. “Then we clean up.”

#####

 

* * *

 

 

Victor woke up the next morning with a grumble, a dead arm, and rapid knocking on their door.

Yuuri was already awake, sat up and staring without moving an inch, not until Victor pushed himself up too, curious what was happening and why he was being so rudely disturbed.

“Who is that?” he asked, voice rough from sleep.

“I don’t know,” Yuuri answered before pushing himself up to his feet. “But if it’s someone looking to hurt us, be prepared.”

Victor was always prepared as he and Yuuri dressed as quickly as they could. Yuuri didn’t reach for the lock – not yet. He moved to grab his bag instead, taking hold of a rock he stored for defence and hiding it behind his back. His hands would’ve done just fine, knowing Yuuri’s strength and skill matched his own, but anything to inflict a wound if attacked was good enough for him.

He gave a nod and they got into position, Yuuri at the door and Victor behind him. He was silent as he twisted the lock. He let out a breath before pulling the door ajar, but to Victor’s anticipated surprise, there was no attack – no loud noise that usually followed. Everything was silent, almost.

“Can I help you?” Yuuri asked to the stranger behind the door, but Victor couldn’t see. He assumed it was the twins, but Yuuri would’ve opened the door further by now.

“My name is Otabek Altin,” the voice spoke, “I was sent here by the Queen to query about a man you have with you, somebody by the name of Victor?”

Yuuri said nothing. He didn’t move either; it was not until Victor moved around him that Yuuri finally pulled the door open, and what Victor saw wasn’t much of a surprise, but what truly took him back was how quickly this was happening.

It wasn’t just a man standing outside, nor a merchant, but a guard covered in light armour as if he was a knight. He stood tall and right, a man shaped to be the perfect soldier from possibly years of experience, yet he didn’t seem to be too old. His face was young, a little older than the kid on their ship, and Victor wondered his age more than he did his reason for being here.

“Why do you ask of me?” Victor eventually asked, arms cross to keep his own guard up.

“I’m afraid I cannot say as I do not know, but the Queen has required you to accompany me to the palace.”

He and Yuuri shared a look of triumph – victory. It was too early to tell, but the odds were in their favour and this was promising. And Victor wordlessly agreed as they grabbed their bags and followed the guard as he exited the tavern, beginning their nerve-racking track towards the palace.

This was it – Victor didn’t doubt. It was the beginning of their plans unfolding before them. There were nerves, and excitement, and their fingers linked as they continued forth.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Victor's foot thing was an accident and I am not sorry
> 
> Kudos and comments are always appreciated. I hope you all enjoyed it and are excited for the next chapter! Thank you <3 <3


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Big love to my beta Izzy <3

The castle walls were the strongest thing for miles around there, yet when Victor looked closer, he noticed the stones. It wasn’t built from marble and mahogany, carved and polished so it would shine. It was built from stones of various shapes and sizes, each one unique but just as brittle as the homes outside.

It was still a castle, the crown of the landscape and protector of its people, but it was a fort of stone built on sweat and bones, and Victor pondered the bloodshed that happened within these walls.

From a distance, the deceiving view could trick anyone into thinking the castle held riches, but the gold wasn’t spent on architecture. It was wasted on luxurious drapes and ridiculously large rugs, like makeup that disguised the castles flaws and scars with a  _ god _ awful colour scheme, but Victor tried not to judge.

But the luxuries were good. The gold, while wasted, was also well spent because that made their plans easier, and Victor couldn’t wipe the smile off his face when he realized this.

“What are you grinning about?” Yuuri whispered as the guard, Otabek, guided them through the castle walls.

Victor didn’t respond. His smile should’ve been enough of a hint, the smug grin on his lips projecting confidence, and he suspected Yuuri soon understood when his eyes turned to every valuable item they walked past, greed twitching his fingers with a desire to grab.

Not after long they were left alone in a room and told to wait, not touch anything, and most definitely not break anything. It took Yuuri only a minute to break exactly two of those rules.

“Yuuri…” Victor sighed, watching his husband scramble to fix the candelabra that fell to pieces in his hands, its candles cracked in half and broken on the floor. “You had one rule.”

“It was two rules, actually, and it was broken before I touched it,” Yuuri argued, eventually giving up trying to fix it by shoving the remnants into a drawer and kicking the candles under a nearby chair. He cleared his throat and straightened his shirt. “There, I fixed it.”

Victor didn’t say anything as he smiled, shaking his head to himself. It wasn’t exactly how he imagined their plan unfolding, with Yuuri breaking the first thing they could steal, and surprisingly, he wasn’t as frustrated as he expected to be, though he still wished Yuuri was a little more careful. They wouldn’t want to get kicked out for Yuuri breaking one small thing.

But Victor still laughed.

“You’re incredible, you know that?” Victor grinned as he stepped forward, hands curling behind his husband’s neck and playing with the ends of his hair. “You’re a remarkable Captain and an amazing husband, and you still find ways to surprise me.”

“In good ways, I hope.” Yuuri smiled, hands burning a loving warmth as they fell on Victor’s hips.

“The best,” he said, pressing a delicate, lingering kiss to Yuuri’s lips. Their foreheads touched when they pulled back, but a breathy laugh soon bounced from Victor’s chest as he met his husband’s gaze. “Just don’t break anything else. We can’t sell broken loot, remember?”

“I told you, it was broken before I touched it,” Yuuri still defended with a lie, but Victor wasn’t a fool. He watched it happen, and yet, his humour still remained. “Perhaps I should grab something bigger, like a fur coat, an ashtray, or that painting over there.”

Victor glanced over his shoulder to see the painting Yuuri pointed to, and blinked hard.

“Have we seen that before?” he asked, a sense of familiarity filling his bones and invading his mind, striking him with a question he wasn’t entirely sure was silly of him to ask. It was too late for him to take it back, but he still wondered.

“I don’t think I recognise it,” Yuuri answered. It was enough to satisfy his question, and yet, the familiarity didn’t ease. “Perhaps if I steal it and hang it up in our room, we could work out if we really have seen it before?”

Victor laughed loudly. “At least wait until we’ve settled in. Imagine if we grab it just as the  _ Queen _ walks in the room. I know I said you’re a good liar, but I don’t think you can lie yourself out of that one.”

“You’d be surprised.” Yuuri winked, and Victor smiled a lopsided grin. “Like you said, I’m a good liar. I bet I could talk my way out of it if I tried hard enough.”

“Perhaps, but I’m the better planner, so maybe listening to my ideas are worth more than your chaotic plans?”

Yuuri hummed loudly. He clearly wasn’t thinking, but rather playing a game, giving Victor something to anticipate as his gaze switched from the painting to him, finger on his lips with thought. And Victor waited, because he enjoyed Yuuri’s playfulness, hands on his hips and anticipating the response.

“I would agree with you,” Yuuri trailed off as Victor raised a brow, “ _ if _ you gave me a kiss.”

Victor couldn’t help his laugh. “Is that all?”

“It’s all I care about.”

And that was all Victor needed as he kissed Yuuri again. The hard press of their mouths filled him with a burning desire – a yearning to turn it into something more heated and passionate, but he held back with a tight grip of Yuuri’s shirt. He had better patience than this, but he almost lost it when Yuuri’s fingers dipped below his shirt, fingertips trailing up his naked back and earning a soft gasp from his lips, but Victor kept his composure. He maintained control.

“Yuuri,” Victor murmured against his lips, and already missed the warmth of them when he pulled back. “You’re stupidly impatient, you know that?”

“I know.” Yuuri smiled.

A sudden click had them pounce back, and Victor wiped his mouth dry as he spun to watch the entrance doors begin to open.

A woman walked in, but it was clear she was no ordinary woman. From the crown on her head to her expensive garments, it was enough to tell Victor exactly who she was, and he wasn’t particularly impressed. By all appearance, she was a Queen – but she was everything Victor expected her to be.

The kid was right when he said he looked just like her. There was a resemblance. She had similar silver hair which darkened with age, and her eyes were the same blues, striking him with an uneasy stare, but that was all Victor could relate to. That was all he could agree with, and if the kid were here, he’d laugh.

He couldn’t deny the similarities, but he could reject the relation.

“What is your name?” she suddenly asked, voice harsh and cold – a demand Victor wouldn’t dare let anyone make.

He may have hesitated to reply, but it wasn’t out of fear.

“It’s Victor,” he settled with, deciding to use the only name he remembered and not his husband’s last name, who reminded him he was still there as their fingers linked. “But I thought you would’ve known that, as the guard you sent asked me here by my name.”

She never responded. Victor supposed it wasn’t important enough, but he wondered what was going through her mind as she moved close enough to touch. She then raised a hand. He would’ve flinched if not for his tight grip around Yuuri’s fingers, but she cupped his cheek gently, soft and tender and completely dissimilar to the cautious stare and hardened expression she held moments before.

“You’re wounded,” she commented, looking over the scars on his face – the marks from tough battles won and lost. “Life hasn’t been so kind to you, has it?”

And swallowing thickly, Victor shook his head.

There was an urge to explain every single one to her, and express how tough life had been, but his memory often failed him and to tell would reveal a past they wish to keep a secret. But her eyes showed the kind of gentle concern only Yuuri would give him, the same one that soothed his chest and calmed his mind. He didn’t know what to think, or do, but something burned within him – a yearning he couldn’t quite explain.

Perhaps it was for the gold on her head or jewels around her fingers. Perhaps it was his desperate need to know who his family was, and this woman – this  _ Queen _ who resembled him in hair and eye colour – was the closest he ever got to having one.

But Victor always imagined upon meeting his birth parents that he would remember them, and looking at this woman, she was just a stranger. He recalled nothing. There were no repressed memories to recover, no strange flashes like he saw in his dreams, nothing but a desire for something he couldn’t explain.

And as her fingers brushed through his fringe, pushing it back to reveal his deepest trauma hidden beneath – the scar on his forehead from the day Yuuri found him – he couldn’t stay silent any longer.

“Is this something you do to all your guests?”

As Victor scanned the Queen’s face for a reaction, silence hung in the air. He expected to see a smile, or perhaps even disbelief that Victor was the son she’d been waiting for. And she smiled, but she crumbled too, dissolving into tears as she cradled Victor’s face.

“It’s… you,” she wept. Her tears didn’t encourage him to support her. He was a pirate, taught and trained to feel numb towards tears from a stranger. He only pitied her. “It’s you; it really is you. My – my son, Vitya, you’re finally back home.  _ My Vitya _ .”

_ My sweet, sweet Vitya. _

And Victor blinked, heart coming to a stop.

“Your… what?”

He had nicknames before. There was Captain Katsuki’s not-so-kind nickname where he called Victor ‘boy’ for the first two years on board his ship, and the pet names he and Yuuri called each other under the sheets in their bedchambers. He wasn’t unfamiliar to a nickname, but Vitya? It was new, and he didn’t wish to have an opinion on it.

But that flash of a voice – the gentle tone of a person calling him that name in his memories… He didn’t know what to think. It was a brief moment, but easily mistaken for something he could have heard last week, or maybe in his sleep. It didn’t mean anything because nothing else came to him; no recognition, no familiarity – nothing.

“Vitya,” she repeated again, but Victor’s brows hung low. “Do you… not remember me?”

His heart tugged at her words, but he still shook his head.

She appeared at a loss for words, mouth hung open as she stared wide-eyed, but Victor wasn’t sure how to ease her shock. He lost his memory. It was as simple as that, and he would’ve assumed she figured that out when she saw his scar, but she never pieced it together.

“You disappear for twelve years, and return with no memory of me?” she murmured, and Victor’s tugging heart didn’t ease. He understood the confusion of not knowing – he knew that too well – but then her glare turned harsh as she suddenly pointing an accusing finger towards Yuuri and demanded, “What did you do to my son?”

Victor never got the chance to get between them before Yuuri snapped, “I’m the one who saved his life so don’t go pointing that finger at me, lady.”

“He never hurt me,” Victor spoke fast, pulling her attention away from her accusation. “He was the one who found me after I lost my memory, and stayed with me since then. His name is Yuuri, and he is my husband.”

He raised a hand to show off his ring, proud of the gold band around his finger as Yuuri did the same. It was a delight watching the realization dawn on her, and regret her false accusation, but she never gave them an apology. She only blinked, no words given, no queries that asked for more – nothing but absolute confusion.

“If it helps, Yuuri has a better memory than me. He’ll be able to tell you everything that happened.”

And finally, the Queen spoke.

“Tell me,” she gasped, voice weak and frail. “Tell me everything.”

And they did.

She was sat as they explained everything, stunned into a muted silence while Yuuri told their lie. She fell for it. She believed every word when Yuuri told her they were nothing more than poor travellers, and Victor almost couldn’t believe how well their plan was going, but this was Yuuri. He was an expert in lying, skilled in deceiving, and Victor let him take control. He knew what he was doing.

That wasn’t to say Victor  _ didn’t _ , but he became distracted. When she soon found sense to speak, she showed them around the castle, and focus was hard when he turned to every valuable and treasured antique, fingers twitching to grab and run. It was tempting, but he had to resist. There was nothing more tasteless than a reckless plan, and Victor didn’t intend to fall victim to mindless greed just yet.

“You are more than welcome to roam these halls to your heart's content.” The Queen grinned when she stopped, turning to the two pirates in disguise. “There are few rooms that you are restricted to, but they’re guarded, so don’t think you can sneak past them. You used to try that often when you were young, Vitya.”

Yuuri chuckled behind his hand as Victor elbowed his side, but the smiles on their faces went unnoticed by the Queen.

“With how big this place is, I doubt we’ll ever find them,” Victor said with a laugh, hoping she won’t catch onto anything suspicious – and she didn’t, thankfully. “We’ve never stayed in a place quite like this before.”

“Will we be meeting the King soon?” Yuuri suddenly spoke, mischief playing in his eyes, and while Victor was curious too, he wondered about Yuuri’s intentions. “It’ll be nice to meet the man in charge of all the gold, and I’m sure Victor’s excited to see his father too.”

If the Queen noticed Victor’s glare at his husband, she didn’t say anything.

“He is out of town for the time being. His return is uncertain, but he will let us know before he does,” she answered. “In the meantime, once your father returns home, we should have a ball to celebrate. It sounds rather fitting, doesn’t it?”

“A ball?” Victor asked, his nerves fraying quickly. “I’ve never been to a ball before.”

“I assumed.” She smiled, and for just a moment, that insulted Victor. “It’ll be great for us to introduce and announce your official return. The expectation will be high, but I have people who can teach and remind you what it’s like to be a prince. I expect some form of sophistication. The same goes for your husband.”

“I’m not the most elegant person, I’m afraid,” Yuuri spoke, clearly trying to hide his laughter but his voice gave it away. “But I’ll try if Victor does.”

Victor had to admit; it was hilarious. The expectation of two pirates who spent their entire lives as anything  _ but _ elegant was unheard of. Besides his sword fighting, Victor didn’t know gracefulness, and he wasn’t entirely sure what  _ poise _ meant either. It was sophistication that was completely alien to them, and Victor wasn’t sure if they could pull that off.

But, of course, she didn’t know they were pirates. If following her expectations meant maintaining their façade, then he’d have to learn fast. Yuuri would need to do the same, but Victor suspected he would test his luck before submitting to their ideals. He always liked to have fun.

“And try you will.” The Queen smiled, and said nothing as she turned, expecting the two to continue to follow.

Victor expected more of a tour around the castle. He would’ve like that. He had already forgotten what rooms were where and if he’d already been down the hallway they were walking through, but he should have been fine. Yuuri would be there to guide him.

And he took hold of Yuuri’s hand, squeezing tightly. Yuuri had never let him down before, he wouldn’t do it now, and Victor reminded himself of that as the Queen guided them to the far end of the castle. She led them away from the busyness, stopping in front of a closed door that both anticipated to see inside.

And she opened the door.

They’ve known luxuries in small forms, like capturing a vessel and razing it from its goods. There were lucky attacks, ones which finally gave them a bed to sleep in and a new desk to replace the old one Yuuri destroyed. They found good loot and treasure, sharing it evenly between their crew, only to have their gold gone within a month, lost by their carelessness as they drank themselves silly to celebrate and treat themselves after.

But the luxuries in the castle – in their  _ room _ – was nothing they’ve known. It was half the size of their ship, furnished with a neatly made bed and a wardrobe full of brightly coloured clothes that might appeal if Victor took a proper look. And unlike their room in the tavern, there was space to move, and too much furniture than Victor felt needed. There was a balcony too, and large windows that filled the room with too much light, but it felt warm, and comfortable. He could see himself settling in rather nicely.

Yuuri walked in first, but Victor never got the chance, suddenly trapped by a pair of arms around him. The embrace was tight, and warm, and Victor never recognised it was the Queen until he heard her mutter, “Welcome home, my son.”

It was strange, and not in the way Victor expected it to be. He never anticipated his heart to ache the way it did nor for his gut to drop in guilt. It wasn’t from shame. Victor had done worse, and made bolder claims that benefited him so selfishly, but there was something about knowing how much this woman missed her son, and how long she waited with the hope that he’d return home… Victor wasn’t prepared to realize that so soon.

He also didn’t care – at least, he convinced himself of that. There was an opportunity here. There was a chance to live the life they deserved, a future they desired, and Victor refused to allow the guilt to fester. He’d be a pathetic excuse of a pirate if he did.

And although he returned the hug, finding a moment of solitude to grip a little tighter, he told himself he didn’t care. He repeated it over and over. He didn’t care. He didn’t.

But then she pulled away, feet moving fast as she left without another word. It all happened so quickly. Victor wasn’t sure if he should look back or turn away, and the annoying ache in his chest didn’t ease. It didn’t make sense, but he shook his head to himself and moved onwards, stepping into the room that already had him admiring its size and riches.

“Now this is what I call royalty,” he commended, and smiled watching Yuuri touch and prod at everything they could potentially steal. “I would tell you to slow down, but this is our room now. We can do whatever we want in here.”

“Exactly.” Yuuri grinned as he turned his attention to the wardrobe. There were clothes inside, and Yuuri showed no care as he pulled out each garment to throw them on the floor, quickly looking through the selection of clothes they had. And glancing at the growing pile, Victor wasn’t impressed.

“I can’t say these royals have good taste,” Victor muttered as he picked up a long red tunic, turning his nose up at the ugly green patterns accompanying it. “Why can’t they just go with something a little less bold?”

A snort of laughter caught his attention, and Victor looked as Yuuri picked up a rich gown of thick materials made up of browns and gold. He held it up against his hips, twirling in a circle in a dance not fit for any royal, but Yuuri laughed as he swayed his hips, meeting Victor’s eyes with light-hearted joy.

“Oh, my.” Victor laughed behind his hand, chuckling to himself as he shook his head. “Yuuri, you look absolutely ridiculous.”

“I think I look rather dashing, actually, but don’t think you’re getting a glimpse of my ankle. I may be your husband, but I have my standards.”

And Victor’s laugh sprung out of him, loud and careless. “You know, I’ve seen more than just your ankle.”

“And I’ve seen more of you too,” Yuuri replied, grinning like an idiot when Victor winked. He then threw the gown on the ground, linked fingers with Victor’s hand and shot him a look that was all just love – just the right amount of softness for Victor’s heart to swell. “Do you remember the bed we had in the tavern?”

“Of course,” Victor nodded. How could he forget?

Suddenly, Yuuri grabbed him tighter and led him away from the pile of clothes on the floor. Victor wasn’t entirely sure what Yuuri had planned until he looked back, and there was no doubting that look.

“Lie down with me,” Yuuri asked, gently tugging his grip for Victor to sit down on the bed too, and he sat, bouncing a little before sinking into the thick comforter. They lay down on their backs. Their eyes turned to the ceiling and their fingers stayed linked in a tight grip, comfortable in silence and content with their goals.

“I think I could get used to this, pretending to be a prince and all,” Victor mused, grinning as he snuggled closer to Yuuri. “We should take advantage of this while we’re here, sleeping in a large bed, eating good food. We should stay in this bed until someone comes looking for us, or perhaps they’ll leave us alone? That’ll be nice.”

“Or we could just steal the bed,” Yuuri replied with a wink. Victor laughed, swatting his arm lightly. “Come on. I’m sure they won’t notice a giant bed had gone missing, or catch us in the act. Maybe we could throw it out the window? It seems sturdy enough.”

“Oh, shut it.”

There was then a moment of nothingness; silence that caressed his skin like a cool summer breeze. It had been one hell of a day. He’d been anticipating this since he came up with the plan, sparked by mischief and encouraged by his husband to go ahead with it, and they did. They stormed onwards without a glance back, and Victor couldn’t believe how well it worked.

He never doubted himself for a second, but the niggling feeling that something could go wrong was unsettling. It could’ve eaten him alive, but here he was, inside a castle with a façade to maintain and a plan to work through. It was almost impossible to believe but too real to ignore, and that was a little too much to take in so soon.

But his husband was here, lying beside him with his hair splayed out on the pillow. It was unfair how he could look so beautiful, all messy dark hair and sun-kissed skin, sleek muscles that’s grip was tight but secure, and Victor couldn’t believe how lucky he was. Yuuri could’ve chosen anyone to marry, and fall in love with, but Yuuri chose him. He fell for a man with half a memory and a forgetful nature, but Yuuri loved him – flaws and all.

He proved it with every kiss, every touch, and every ounce of concern he showed to nobody else but him.

“How are you feeling?”

And just like that, Yuuri proved it – time and time again.

“Good. Yeah, I’m good.” Victor smiled, nodding. “I might get lost in this place. I’ve already forgotten where almost everything is. I think I’ll need to follow you around for a little while.”

“I don’t think most of this castle is that important for us anyway,” he replied with the wave of his hand. “It’s those restricted rooms I’m curious about. I bet they have all sorts of treasures hidden in them. Maybe diamonds, or jewels. Perhaps even a crown. Imagine how much that would be worth!”

Victor was imagining it now. He and Yuuri would sneak into a darkened room and find the crown ready for the taking. Yuuri would grab it and perhaps even wear it as they rushed out the castle, guards and soldiers on their tail, but they’d never catch them. They’d laugh as they run, hands linked and hearts beating as one because they did it – their plan worked.

And Victor smiled dreamily as he muttered, “This worked out so well.”

“And all because they believe you’re their son.” Yuuri nodded, brushing his fingertips along Victor’s arm. There was a pang inside – a sudden familiar ache in his chest, but he ignored it. “How long do you think we should stay for?”

“How long are you thinking?”

“Perhaps a few months,” Yuuri answered, shifting to lay on his side. “We could gradually move things out one by one, get Phichit to discreetly move everything onto the ship, then leave without anyone knowing. That’s if we don’t try to sneak into those restricted rooms, but they sound fun, don’t they?”

“Let’s just survive this ball first,” Victor told him, hoping to calm Yuuri’s excitement. He was excited himself, but Yuuri was more chaotic in his joy and careless when planning. “We should look around and decide what to do. We need to learn what guard walks around at what time, when their schedules are, their route. We need to find a place to hide stuff too, somewhere Phichit can meet us.”

Yuuri said nothing as he smiled, and the shake of his head had Victor’s brows drop.

“What are you smiling about?”

“This is why you’re a better planner than me.” Yuuri grinned, raising a hand to brush his fingers across Victor’s cheek. The compliment eased his expression, as did the touch, but he knew that already.

“I know,” he smiled, and gently took hold of Yuuri’s wrist to plant a kiss in his palm, “but you’re still the best Captain to sail the seven seas, and the crew and I will follow you anywhere, into any battle, no hesitation.”

“I’d be nothing without you,” Yuuri replied, his expression pained and his voice broken. “I’ve never been the most level-headed. Father always told me that would be my downfall. I don’t know where I’d be without you to keep me in check.”

“I think even if I wasn’t here, you’d prove Captain Katsuki wrong,” Victor told him, and although Yuuri didn’t look convinced, he felt no need to repeat himself. Victor wouldn’t lie to him, and Yuuri knew that. “But we’re a team. It’s you and I, sailing the seas until we find somewhere to call home.”

“And we’ll find it,” Yuuri answered, his eyes sparkling with the confidence Victor adored to see. “If this plan fails and we escape with our heads still attached, we’ll find another way. We’ll get our gold, and our future, and nothing will stop us from getting what we want.”

“It hasn’t in the past, and it won’t happen in our future.”

It wasn’t entirely true. They’ve had plans go sour, and a few lives lost in the process. They’ve tried to find gold only to be hours too late or following a lost trail, greed getting the better of them as they desperately tried and tried again. But they’d prevail. They’ll one day get what they want because they haven’t died yet, and neither intended for their blood to spill – not now, and not ever.

“I don’t know what I ever did to be this lucky, and have you as my husband.”

“I think the same thing,” Victor admitted, “but I fell in love with you, and you did the same. I’m the luckiest man in the world.”

And Victor leaned in for a kiss, the kind he wanted to last forever. He often forgot how rough Yuuri’s lips could be sometimes, dry from the ocean air but still delightful to feel, and Victor wondered if the castle might have something to help keep them smooth, but his thoughts didn’t stay for long. There was the hint of something more, then the press of Yuuri’s tongue in his mouth, and a sweet familiar taste that left Victor in want.

Then after a moment he withdrew to gaze at his husband’s face. Yuuri smiled a stupid grin, and with his voice low he whispered, “Have I ever told you I love you?”

Victor grinned. “Not nearly as much as you should.”

“Well, I love you,” Yuuri said, but Victor heard his words before he said them. “I’d say more, but I fear I’m getting a little too cheesy. I’ve never really been good at expressing myself, but you already know that.”

“I think you express yourself perfectly,” Victor replied, and gave Yuuri a kiss – slow and sweet. “And I love you too.”

 

* * *

_ Victor knew the Captain was watching him. _

_ His eyes were sharp, fast to watch Victor when he helped out the crew and quick to judge his capabilities, telling him he was doing something wrong before he could even acknowledge it himself. _

_ There were things Victor could do and picked up rather quickly. Yuuri showed him the ropes, guiding him through everything he was allowed to do and what he was too young to learn just yet, and Victor learned fast with Yuuri. He could tie a tight rope, climb up high to keep a lookout, and do everything he was told to do. There was a lot Victor could do, but just as much he couldn’t do. _

_ He struggled with things that required him to remember. His memory often failed him since waking up on this ship, and he couldn’t even remember what the ship was called. It was strange what he could keep in mind compared to what completely vanished within an hour. He remembered specific rope ties, but forgot how to use the spyglass. He recalled the insignificant story Yuuri told the day before, but forgot important details the Captain wanted him to remember. It was strange. Victor didn’t understand it himself, and his nerves ate away at his heart when the Captain finally spoke to him about it. _

_ “You’ve not been able to remember much, have you?” he asked, and Victor wordlessly shook his head, afraid defending himself would do him more harm than good. “I’d say that’s enough to throw you off board, but you seem rather capable.” _

_ Victor blinked, his heart doing a double-take as he asked, “I do?” _

_ “I have yet to decide,” he replied. “You’re not where Yuuri is, but I believe you have potential. However, if you do wish to stay here, you can’t run around this ship without knowing how to handle a sword.” _

_ “Are you going to teach me?” he asked, rather excited to be taught how to use one. He watched the other pirates fight one another, a game they played to pass the time, but as the Captain chuckled and shook his head, Victor held his breath. _

_ “Not quite,” he answered, and turned to grab a spare sword from the side. It appeared he planned for this, but Victor hadn’t as the sword was passed to him. The Captain then unsheathed his own, and Victor really didn’t like where this was going, especially when he began to circle around him. _

_ “I don’t expect you to disarm me,” he smiled, stopping to get in position – sword aimed directly at Victor, who was the least bit prepared. “But I’d like to see how long you can hold up against me.” _

_ He may have been prepared but not ready for when the sword came swiping towards him, its intention to wound if he didn’t block. He reacted fast enough, clanging metal echoing around the ship, and Victor smiled with pride until the next swipe caught him off guard. It didn’t cut, but it was close, and his heart hammered in his chest. _

_ “Come on boy,” the Captain mocked, laughing loud as he aimed for the sword shaking in Victor’s grip. “You can do better than this!” _

_ He managed to block the attack, but not the next as the blade caught his borrowed shirt, cutting through the fabric and slashing his arm. He recoiled back with a hiss, hand pressed over the wound to ease its ache, and it seemed the Captain allowed it, granting him a moment of rest, but Victor knew it wouldn’t last long. _

_ He needed to focus. If he had any chance of staying on this ship, even when everything was telling him to dive into the ocean and swim for shore, he needed to fight back – logically and wisely. He exhaled a breath and gripped his weapon tighter. He focused on the blade in hand rather than the terror rushing through him, and when the next attack came, he was prepared. _

_ There was strategy in the Captain’s brawl, as he was far more skilled, and wise, and knocked Victor down with ease. _

_ He caught Yuuri watching at some point when he found himself on the ground again, disarmed from an attack he hardly saw coming. His cheeks burned with embarrassment as a crowd built, but Yuuri seeing his fall – his pitiful attempt at earning his worth to stay on board – was the worst humiliation. _

_ And sure, it wasn’t expected of the kid with memory loss to put up a good fight, but he still hated how weak he felt. He hated how everyone laughed when he failed to defend himself, and mocked him for trying, but Yuuri wouldn’t want to see him give up. He was the only one who hadn’t laughed, and that was enough to push Victor to keep going. _

_ He may have mixed opinions on the crew, and felt awful intimidation from the Captain, but this was all he had – all he knew. He’d rather have this than loneliness. _

_ And on his third fall with the tip of a sword against his throat, the Captain called it finished. _

_ Victor didn’t dare turn to Yuuri. He couldn’t stand seeing his reaction to how miserably Victor failed. He already prepared himself for his eventual departure midway through the fight, so when the Captain helped him to his feet, he waited for the inevitable. _

_ “I wasn’t surprised that you didn’t put up a good fight,” he began, taking the sword from Victor’s hand, “but you did try. And you didn’t back down. I see potential in that.” _

_ And Victor stared. “There is?” _

_ “What’s the point if you’re going to let your enemies knock you around? You may as well be dead, but you didn’t let me hold you down. You kept going and I think with enough training, you could do well,” the Captain spoke, and it took a lot for Victor to bite back his surprise. “You’re not where Yuuri is, but there’s potential.” _

_ Victor’s heart stopped. “Wait, so that means…” _

_ And as the Captain grinned, Victor returned a smile. _

_ “Welcome aboard.” _

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Me: Yeah theres gonna be some smut  
> them: no we're gonna be romantic and shit
> 
> BUT WE GETTING SOMEWHERE! 
> 
> I also wanna give a shoutout to kathe for drawing [Pirate Victor](https://twitter.com/mandolinearts/status/1123684051003506691)  
> based off this fic!! You all should check it out! ❤⃛ヾ(๑❛ ▿ ◠๑ )


	4. Chapter 4

“How long do you plan to keep me here?”

The kid’s voice startled Phichit, but only for a moment, distracting him from cleaning his boots as he looked up.

He hadn’t moved. He stayed sat in his cell with his back turned, past wrath settled to a bitterness Phichit could taste with every word, but it was a divine taste – a sweet satisfaction from a kid who induced so much rage within him.

But Phichit had done well listening to Captain Yuuri’s orders. He hadn’t harmed the kid, nor threatened his life with the end of his sword. They hardly spoke, but Phichit purposefully ignored him much like the Captain ordered him to. His current appearance was supposed to be a quick visit. He planned to be in and out, expecting the kid to ignore him, but it seemed he finally wished to speak.

He shouldn’t respond. He mustn’t engage with someone who can easily trigger his own rage, but what harm was there in answering a question?”

“For as long as the Captain sees fit.”

It didn’t seem to satisfy the kid. There was a huff, and Phichit tried to ignore it.

“Why don’t you just kill me?”

He nearly laughed. If the Captain gave him the permission – the _honour_ of murdering the kid, he’d do it in a heartbeat. He heard the vile words and nasty comments he spat, and the crew told him of the way he’d reject any form of assistance. The temptation to harm him was already hard to resist, but to kill would take that away from his Captain.

Phichit may have a short fuse, but he was loyal before he was reckless.

“That is for the Captain to decide,” he replied with a shrug. “He can be a merciful man, but he’s never allowed anyone to live after seeing his face. I can’t promise the odds are in your favour, but you never know.”

The kid snorted a laugh. “And what will he do, force me to walk the plank?”

Phichit clenched his fist, nails digging into his palm, resisting the urge to grab him by the throat and demand his silence, but he knew better. He’d never stop if he did. He didn’t appreciate the smart comment, nor the way the boy spoke about his Captain, and usually he’d never allow anyone to get away with that unharmed, but he made a promise. He couldn’t break his word.

But he had a thought, one which would terrify the kid. If he noticed the smug look on Phichit’s face, he didn’t say anything, but his eyes revealed more than he liked and Phichit didn’t hold back his smirk.

“Perhaps you’ll be lucky. He might just blind and cut your tongue out. I’d say that’s a far more merciful ending. You can survive without sight or a voice, so perhaps I could persuade the Captain to do that instead. It sounds better than death, doesn’t it?”

The kid didn’t respond, and Phichit’s smirk never wavered.

He resumed cleaning his boots in silence. It was nice, especially around such a chaotic and loud crew like Yuuri’s own, but they were family and Phichit didn’t mind. He wiped away the blood left to dry from their previous fight, scrubbing the stubborn stains that refused to budge. It was his fault for leaving it so long. He wasn’t efficient like his Captain, but he was trying to be.

He gave up eventually, slipping on his stained boots with ease before standing.

When he next looked up, the kid was standing too, fingers clutched around the cell bars and glaring daggers at Phichit. The temptation to punch the look off his face was tempting, but he promised not to hurt him. His Captain told him not to.

So, Phichit bit his tongue – literally; teeth dug into his tongue to hold back the lump of rage in his throat as he turned to leave.

“Your Captain will betray you in the end.”

But Phichit stopped in his tracks, and against everything _screaming_ at him to listen to Captain Yuuri’s warning, to _not engage_ , he turned. He returned the glare, staring back into the eyes that hated him so much and tilted his head, daring the boy to speak ill of his Captain.

“I know what you pirates are like,” he spat, but Phichit had nothing to say – yet. “You’re all the same. You’re selfish and desperate, and as soon as your Captain has his gold, he’ll be gone. None of you will see a single bit of it. He’ll run. He’ll leave with that idiot of his, running away with their gold and riches. He’ll forget about you, and–!”

He never saw himself move. There was no awareness when he lunged, gripping the kid’s shirt so tightly he nearly ripped the fabric, but he did catch the kid’s reaction, and it was worth going against Yuuri’s word to see it – almost.

Yuuri always told him he was a ticking time bomb. Always. Any provocation, no matter how small, and his temper would blow. He’d react before he could think, always grasping for the throat as if it were his signature move, and it appeared to be what he aimed for. The kid must’ve seen it coming, recoiling back when Phichit tried to reach for his goal and instead grabbed his shirt.

Which was fine. The fear was still the same and Phichit _indulged_ in it, especially when the kid gripped his wrist, tight fingers silently begging for freedom. But unlike his Captain, his anger controlled him.

“Don’t you _dare_ speak about my Captain that way,” he growled, his voice cold and harsh but usually steady for someone trembling with rage. “He is a man worth my loyalty. He’s earned it, because after all the years I’ve sailed with him, he’s never once failed us as a Captain. He demands every ounce of our being, but what he gives in return is more than we deserve. He’s a leader, and he’s given me more than anyone ever has. My loyalty will lie with him until the day I die.”

“Your loyalty is misplaced.”

Phichit scoffed. “And yours isn’t?”

“I’m honourable.”

He couldn’t help his loud boisterous laugh, but it was needed. The kid had guts. He couldn’t deny that, but if Phichit’s loyalty was misplaced, then so was the kid’s honour – his spirit.

“My loyalty is with a man who’s proven it, but your honour is for selfish dictators,” he told, speaking before the kid had the chance to argue back. “I know what you royals are like too. You make choices to benefit yourselves and your needless armies. You bleed kingdoms dry of gold and wealth to support your idea of superiority, uncaring to those struggling to get by.”

“That’s not me,” the kid growled through gritted teeth, fighting against Phichit’s hold but it was too strong and tight. He’d have to rip his shirt if he wished to get away.

“You wonder why we steal, and fight, and be what you call _scum_ . It’s because we have no other choice. It’s because of people like you who’ve forced us into poverty, who made choices for selfish reasons to benefit yourselves and hurt others. That’s why I’ve turned to my Captain who’s given me more than any royal could _ever_ offer, so tell me, why should I not assume that’s you?”

“Because I know that!” the kid shouted. “I know Kings and Queens like that, and I never support those who think of themselves more than their people. There are many bad royals, but plenty of them try their best. You don’t know how hard it is to make the right choices, and decide what’s best. I am not what you claim to be, so don’t presume to know me.”

Phichit was… mildly surprised. There was logic somewhere in the kid’s rant, something that made him exhale a breath and release his shirt. Perhaps it was the truth behind his words, or how Phichit truly didn’t understand because he made presumptions towards a child who looked no older than fifteen. He’d never admit it, but he did wonder.

But his statement still stood – royalty was a dictatorship, and the poor suffered from its consequence. He was still right, but as much as he wanted to scream and shout at the closest person there was to make his point valid, he was still blaming his past on a _child_.

He couldn’t tell if Yuuri would deem this as ‘Captain worthy’, but any doubt in his act meant he should move on.

He exhaled a deep breath. “Listen, kid…”

“It’s _Yuri_.”

“Ah, you have the same name as my Captain.” Phichit grinned, finding this more amusing than it should’ve been. “I bet he had a good laugh about that, didn’t he?”

“Shut up.”

Phichit let out a breathy laugh as he stepped closer, inches away from the kid’s face who refused to back down, and grinned widely.

“Look, I don’t care who you are or where you’re from. You may be royalty but you’re not on this ship. You’re just a kid, and the sooner you accept that, the easier things will be.”

“Filthy scum,” the kid muttered before turning to sit down again. Phichit was surprised by his reaction, tucking his legs against his chest to ignore everything around him. And for a moment, he truly looked like a child – vulnerable and innocent, but Phichit still rolled his eyes. At least he was beginning to _act_ like a child, but he wondered if that was any better.

“I just want to do what’s right.”

And Phichit was thankful the kid’s back was turned because something inside him shifted, a feeling that was distressingly similar.

It was all he ever wanted too – for his Captain. Yuuri trusted him with this responsibility for a reason, and although his rage made him a liability, Yuuri believed in him. He saw more in Phichit than just a man with rage, but the will to lead a crew to victory. He will never let his Captain down because Yuuri had yet to do the same. He made a vow. A promise.

“I suppose we all want to do right for the people we care about.”

He never stayed to see the kid’s reaction. He didn’t wish to see it. He turned to stride out onto the deck, filling his lungs with fresh ocean air as he inhaled a long, steady breath.

He expected better of himself. He should’ve listened to his Captain’s orders and not engage, and now there was a temptation to throw his blade at the deck walls, releasing his anger alongside his self-hatred, but Yuuri wouldn’t be pleased. He already did enough damage by speaking with the captive; he shouldn’t add insult to injury.

But while he went against the Captain’s word, he maintained control. He never let his anger get to him – almost, and Yuuri would be proud of him.

 

* * *

 

 

Yuuri was a man of many things, but a morning person wasn’t one of them.

Victor always told him he was a night owl, preferring the stars over the bright glare of the morning sun, and Yuuri wouldn’t deny that fact. The pure black of night was his comfort. It was safe and peaceful and everything always felt so far away, but that didn’t mean he disliked mornings; it was just rare for him to be the first one awake.

He wasn’t sure what awoke him that first morning in the castle. He suspected nerves, or the bright morning sun shining in his eyes, but none of that felt right. There was something bothering him. It was a thought in the back of his mind, an itch he couldn’t quite scratch, and while Yuuri tried to ignore it, he lasted for as long as his patience could handle.

Then Yuuri was on his feet, pacing for a while until he found himself stood by the window, resting against the stone wall and looking across the kingdom.

It was a strange view, unlike anything he was used to. The land was too steady and there was a fresh smell in the air, one that didn’t reek of fish and salt, but Yuuri wasn’t sure if he liked it. It was too unfamiliar. He missed his ship, and his crew, and the gentle roll of waves crashing against the ship’s walls. This was so alien to him, but it wasn’t all bad.

This was a luxury he never had – an indulgence he intended to take advantage of, and Yuuri found himself chuckling. If only his father could see him now.

He couldn’t decide what his father might think of him. He was a strict man with raw honesty; Yuuri was sure there’d be some criticism, but everything he did, he learned from his father. It was his guidance and leadership, and Yuuri followed the man until the very end. He rebuilt his honour in a way his father could never do himself. Yuuri took what was learned and made it _better_. He was sure his father would have something to say, but deep down, he knew he did the man proud.

Yuuri almost hated that he saw himself in his father. He owed it to the man who raised him, but where his father did right, he also did very wrong, and Yuuri refused to follow the same path.

He never hated the man, but he was a Captain before a father. Always. He was a man with no other responsibility beyond his ship, who didn’t have a wife and daughter to return to. He was a man who disappeared for months only to return for a few days, expecting that to be enough before leaving again, and his negligence had been his downfall.

He left, as usual, but returned to a village razed to ashes and dust, and the bodies of his loved ones buried beneath. There was no reason behind the murders. Nobody knew who did it or why, but his father changed that day; for better or worse, Yuuri couldn’t decide, but he became certain on one thing. His opinion of the man changed that day too.

He should’ve done more. If Yuuri ever had to leave Victor alone for that long, he didn’t dare leave without knowing he’d be safe. He promised to protect Victor, and Yuuri would be damned if he ever abandoned him the same way his father did his mother and sister. He’d choose his love over his life, but his father was a selfish man.

Yuuri didn’t hate his father. He was just an idiot – a neglectful, selfish idiot.

But none of that mattered. His father died the way he lived – surrounded by the ocean, and Yuuri long learned to stop dwelling on the past. It was the present and their future that mattered, and Yuuri found himself grinning again.

“Since when was I not the perfect view in the morning?”

When Yuuri turned, his breath escaped him. Victor was always so beautiful; there was no doubt about it, but his husband knew how to put on a show. There he was, naked body on show with the sheets barely covering the lower half of his body, and faint bruises blossoming across his chest with a pleasant reminder of the night before. The morning sun kissed his pale skin with a soft glow and there was a smile on his lips, warm and bright and so beautiful, it was like the stars themselves.

“You always will be,” Yuuri replied with a grin and absolute truth in his words. He sat on the side of the bed, fingers brushing through Victor’s tangled locks as he gave him a good morning kiss. “I was just looking. It’s a strange view, that’s all.”

“I know,” Victor mused, a faint smile on his lips as he stared past the window, looking beyond the kingdom and towards the ocean they knew so well. “It’s weird how still everything is, and we can’t hear the ocean. It’s not like on our ship, but just think, this’ll be what it’s like when we leave. Everything will be so silent and still… I’m not sure if I could get used to it.”

“I was thinking that,” Yuuri commented as he stared. He’d seen enough of this view in the few hours he’d been awake, but it hadn’t helped him grow used to the sight. It was still so strange, and unfamiliar, and Yuuri found himself thankful when Victor’s fingers trailed up his arm, tugging his gaze away to be on him instead.

“I’m the perfect view, remember?” he repeated, and Yuuri’s smile grew – wide and bright. His husband was always the perfect view. “Also, it’s early and I’m hungry. Do I get breakfast in bed?”

He pulled a face before laughing. “Just because they think you’re a prince doesn’t mean I’m going to treat you like one.”

“I always thought you treated me like a prince.”

“Which is why I don’t need to get you breakfast in bed, _your highness_ ,” he teased, and kissed his pouting husband on the forehead. “But I suppose I could find us someone to bring us some food. It’ll be nice having someone to wait around on us, wouldn’t it?”

Victor nodded happily. “As long as I get some food in me, I’m happy.”

And they kissed, once again, excitement growing inside. They had their fun. They took pleasure in the luxuries and had many more days to take advantage of it again, but they had a goal to achieve. Their plan wasn’t going to unfold itself and as Yuuri pulled away from the kiss, he smiled a mischievous grin.

“We begin this plan today,” he told, watching his husband nod pleasingly. “We’ll look around together, get familiar with this place, and see what we have to work with.”

It was time to get started, and Yuuri could only hope things would continue to go easy on them.

 

* * *

 

 

Yuuri recalled the Queen telling them they had an expectation – a requirement to be appropriate royals, but the first few days went by with little bother.

She appeared, sometimes, talking to Victor for a moment before disappearing for another few hours. Yuuri didn’t know how the woman could be so busy, or what she had to do that always required her constant attention, but he didn’t care enough to investigate. It was good she was out of their way. It meant freedom to talk, chances to steal.

Victor followed Yuuri, fingers twined together as they searched the castle for rooms that sparked interest. There was something to steal no matter where they looked, rich goods and expensive possessions, all stupidly easy to grab and valuable, possibly worth more than Yuuri’s ship. His fingers twitched with a need. His mind encouraged him to take the risk and steal, but Victor wouldn’t be pleased with him.

It was hard not to steal. It was so easy to slip an ashtray in his pocket, or a necklace in his palm, hidden from view until he’d gift it to Victor, but it was too early. They hadn’t found a way to get anything back to the ship; if they stole now, they’d be wasting an opportunity.

Yuuri knew, logically, that waiting was their best option. Victor explained it to him. He spoke over it a thousand times now, and it made sense, but the plan almost didn’t feel real. There was nothing to show that they were here to steal – no valuables taken, or gold to show for. The plan felt delayed, and the longer Yuuri waited, the harder it became to bite back his need for recklessness.

He just wanted chaos, and gold, and the plan to _finally_ begin to feel real.

“It’s getting hard not to grab something like this plate,” Yuuri admitted one evening over dinner, whispering to Victor from across the table. They were alone this time, the Queen too busy to make an appearance, but the household staff still walked around to serve them. _Slaves_ , as Yuuri suspected they actually were. “I’m sure they won’t notice a fork gone missing, or a small ashtray. I just want to grab _something_.”

Yuuri knew he was getting desperate, but his patience wore thin.

“And I told you, we should wait until after this ball,” Victor explained to him. _Again_. Yuuri imagined he was growing sick of repeating himself but Yuuri couldn’t help himself to try. “If I gain these peoples trust as a prince, we can do so much with that, but that means being patient. I know it feels easy, but you have better self-control than this, don’t you?”

He did, and he nodded to prove that. Yuuri was fully aware he was just being paranoid, not that he’d admit it, but then Victor reached over to grasp his hands tightly. He held them in his own, stopping Yuuri’s nails from unknowingly scratching at the scar, and Yuuri cursed himself for being so obvious.

“What’s bothering you, Yuuri?” Victor whispered, voice calm and soothing – almost enough to ease the ache in his chest and the need to tug at his sleeve. But while Victor could read him like an open book, he didn’t intend to tell the truth.

“Nothing,” he replied with the shake of his head. “It’s nothing, really. It’s just… nothing.”

“Nothing,” Victor said, unamused. “I know you don’t like to talk about how you’re feeling all the time, but you don’t scratch at your scar for nothing. You also don’t lie to me. You don’t have to tell me what’s wrong, but don’t lie when you say it’s nothing.”

“It’s something, then,” Yuuri admitted. “It’s something, but I don’t want to talk about it. I know it’s just me being… me. I’ll make sense of it eventually.”

Victor exhaled a long breath, eyes turned to the table as he spoke; “If it’s about the scar…”

“It’s not,” Yuuri said, quickly denying the assumption. “It’s not the scar, I promise.”

“Then you’re worrying about the plan, aren’t you?” Victor guessed a second time. He still didn’t want to talk about it, and Victor guessing had him frustrated, but he always said Yuuri was better off admitting his thoughts than bottling them up, so he mutely nodded his head, giving in to Victor’s prying.

“I’m just being impatient,” Yuuri confessed.

“And it’s okay to be impatient,” Victor told him. “You’re allowed to look at this and wish for it to go quicker, because the sooner we get out of here, the better, right?”

“It’ll just make me feel like we’re progressing if we did.”

“But we’ve also only been here for four days. I know we’re good, but we’re not _that_ good,” Victor said, squeezing his fingers in support as Yuuri huffed. He knew that. He was very aware of their time spent here, but Yuuri didn’t think rationally like Victor – not always. “I’ve been wanting to grab something and run too. It feels so easy, but Yuuri… you’ll be the one to lead us to success. I come up with the plans, but you ensure our victory. You’re brave, and _so strong_. If anything goes wrong, I know you’ll get us out of it.”

Yuuri chewed on his lip for a moment until a faint laugh exhaled past his lips. “You really believe in me, don’t you?”

“Yuuri,” Victor spoke, pulling his gaze back onto his husband. “You trust me, right?”

“Always.”

“Then trust me when I say we’ll be alright,” he spoke, words forceful and full of truth – but Yuuri still hesitated. “Whether things go right or wrong, I trust my husband and _my Captain_ to get us out safely. I’ve never had a reason to doubt that. I know how… _huge_ this plan is, and how bad things can turn if something goes wrong, but you can do this and so can I. I believe that wholeheartedly, and you should too.”

Yuuri didn’t argue back. He knew better than to do so. His husband was calmer and more calculated in his responses than Yuuri, who often spoke with his heart and not his mind. His father always complained about that, so Yuuri stayed silent. He turned his gaze away until a soft kiss pressed to the fabric around his wrist, and Yuuri’s heart burst with the need to cry.

But he wasn’t going to. Captain Yuuri Katsuki never cried.

“What did I do to deserve you?” he asked, blinking back the tears with a heavy breath.

“You won my heart.” Victor grinned, moving to kiss Yuuri’s knuckles. “You won’t let me down, Yuuri. You never have and you never will.”

 

* * *

 

 

It was day eight when they found a passageway.

Victor found it after losing Yuuri somewhere in the castle. He found himself in the garden, stumbling around trying to find his way back when he discovered an overgrown hidden walkway, leading to what appeared to be an abandoned dock. Then Victor waited. He stayed put, hoping Yuuri found find him so he wouldn’t forget his discovery, and Yuuri did find him, eventually.

“Yuuri!” Victor gasped, rushing towards his husband when Yuuri rounded the corner. “I’ve found something I think will really help us out. It’s this – I found, ugh… just – follow me.”

And, at the time, Yuuri didn’t know what to expect. He thought Victor wanted to show him a cute animal, or a flower that had a deep romantic meaning he wished to express, but what Victor showed him was better. It was _so_ much better.

They struggled through the overgrown passageway, pushing past thick weeds and tall grass, but the worry he had spiders all over him was quickly forgotten when Yuuri saw what Victor had found. It was just what they needed. The area was secluded, hidden from any cautious eyes watching them. The walkway was too dangerous to walk across, planks of wood missing and decaying with age, but they didn’t need that. There was a river, its steady flow seemed to lead to the ocean and would be perfect for Phichit to meet them without being seen. It was the perfect find – almost too good to be true, and Yuuri couldn’t help his excitement as he kissed Victor hard and fast.

“Victor, this is amazing!” Yuuri grinned, hands cradling Victor’s head and kissing him all over his face. “You’re amazing! This is just the place we needed. It’s perfect. I can’t believe how lucky we are that you found somewhere like this!”

“I’m a little starstruck myself,” Victor admitted, shrugging. “I didn’t expect to find anything but I just… stumbled upon it, really. It’s almost too good to be true.”

“It’s perfect,” Yuuri said, turning to gaze upon his surroundings. It wasn’t beautiful by no means, or somewhere Yuuri would wish to spend time at, but it was exactly what he was hoping for. It was just the place he needed – the struck of luck they deserved.

“We can get word out to Phichit,” Victor began as he pointed down the river. “He might be able to sail up here in a small boat, but if not, he should be able to walk if he begins by the shore. It’ll be a trek, but if we don’t overload him with stuff, _or_ he manages to get a boat up here, we should be alright.”

“It sounds like a plan.”

“But we wait until after the ball,” Victor reminded. “When that’s out the way, and I have the trust of the King and Queen, we can begin thieving.”

Yuuri remembered their agreement, and he was a little disappointed Victor still wished to make him wait, but he still nodded. “Until after the ball,” he agreed. “I’ll get word out to Phichit once we have something worth stealing. It’ll make more sense for me to disappear for a few days than you, but I want to check out those guarded rooms first – wherever they are.”

“I’m surprised we haven’t found them yet,” Victor said, eyes turning towards the castle, but neither could see it. The overgrown weeds towered over them, hiding them from sight and mind – but that was just what they wanted.

“We’ll find it,” Yuuri said, turning back to Victor with a grin on his face. “But this is good. This is progress. And I must admit, it’s nice to finally have a plan not go wrong somewhere along the way. I don’t think we’ve ever had something go this smoothly before.”

Victor laughed, nodding. “It’s a nice change of pace,” he admitted, “and hopefully, it’ll stay this way until the very end.”

Yuuri hummed, a smile on his lips as he nodded. It wasn’t often their plans worked so well. Many were successful and they came out victorious, but there was always something that held them back – a person, or a situation that would almost ruin everything. Yuuri hoped this time was different. There was a light feeling in his gut, a faint tugging that told him not to assume that so soon, but with their luck, Yuuri had hope.

“I do like the privacy,” Victor whispered low in his ear, and Yuuri’s grin stretched wider. “It’s not the most romantic place, and I think I’d be disappointed if you brought me here for a romantic evening out, but it’s quiet. It’s private, and the chances of anyone finding us are slim.”

Yuuri turned, brow raised as he asked, “What are you trying to suggest, _your highness_?”

“I’ll leave that for you to decide.”

“Ah, but for you are a prince and I am a pirate,” Yuuri teased, hand pressed to the low of Victor’s back, turning him to face one another. “Just imagine what the others may think, the royals and your kingdom, if they so dare find that a prince is in love with a pirate – a Captain, no less!”

“But I do not care what they may think. Those who dare question the prince may risk a fatal end, for I’ve found love. No man or kingdom can take that away from me, or fear my wrath when I become King!” Victor declared, and paused for a moment before they both broke into a fit of giggles. “We really got into that, didn’t we?”

“We did.” Yuuri nodded. It was so stupid, and he wasn’t sure why he played along, but it was fun in the end. “You know, I like to think that even if you were raised as a prince, we’d still find each other, one way or another.”

“Of course.” Victor smiled softly. “Captain Yuuri Katsuki would catch sight a beautiful prince he wishes to have as his lover, fine treasure to add to his collection, and kidnaps Prince Victor as his own.”

“But Prince Victor wishes to be taken away,” Yuuri continued. “He desires to escape his life alongside a man who’d show him the world – pirate or not. And Prince Victor still falls for him.”

“They get married a year later, no arrangements or expectations – just two lovers with rings on their fingers.”

“And a life to live as their own.”

They fell silent, neither speaking a word, but their smiles spoke for themselves – their stupid grins that broke out into laughter once again. It was so silly of them, but their laughter fell short as Victor’s hand reached for Yuuri’s, interlocked as they kissed.

“This is exactly why I married you,” Victor said in barely more than a whisper.

“Was it my stupid jokes or my charm?”

“Everything,” Victor replied before gently leaning in and kissing Yuuri’s lips. “It was everything.”

Yuuri hummed pleasingly. “I love you.”

“I love you too.”

 

* * *

 

 

They never found the guarded rooms, but during their search for something rich, they discovered a library instead.

Yuuri didn’t have much interest in the room. He wasn’t much of a book fanatic, but Victor demanded they return another day when they had time to kill, wishing to browse through the large selection of books that were shelved. Yuuri agreed because he wasn’t one to deny his husband something he enjoyed, even when he had no interest himself.

And Yuuri, while bored out of his mind waiting for Victor to decide which book he wanted to read, stayed put. He may have had no interest, but watching Victor browse through the bookshelves had a certain appeal, one which made him smile fondly.

“You’re going to read all those?” Yuuri questioned, eyeing the pile of books in Victor’s hand.

Victor picked up another book, giving Yuuri a look and ignoring his comment before placing the pile on the desk with a huff.

“I intend to.” He nodded and turned to search for another. “We never did have a lot of books on the ship, and the ones we did have were always water damaged. I want to catch up with a bit of light reading while we’re here.

Yuuri decided not to make a comment on Victor’s ‘light reading’. There were twelve – possibly thirteen books on his pile, far too many for Yuuri to consider as anything light. He shook his head to himself, sighing as he picked up the first book he grabbed and flipped through the pages with no interest in reading.

“It’s too many words for me.” He frowned. “I’d rather things be simpler.”

“You never really did care about reading, did you?”

Yuuri shook his head, smirking as he placed the book back onto its pile. “I prefer the ways my words can make a man drop to his knees. Out of pleasure or terror? It doesn’t matter. If he listens to my words and understand that I’m the one telling this story, and I’m the one in control, my words will mean more than some storybook I have no interest in reading.”

Victor’s stare was blank, like his brain stuttered for a moment to take in his husband’s words. Yuuri still smiled widely, arms crossed over his chest as he waited for a reaction, but Victor stayed silent for a moment. He hesitated, blinking hard before finally letting out a faint, breathy laugh.

“Dare I call you sadistic?”

“You can, but only because I don’t know what the word means,” he admitted, but the look on Victor’s face had him thinking. “Actually, perhaps I should read a book or two. Reading is an important skill to have, but father never really did give us an education, did he?”

“He never gave us a lot of things,” Victor commented, turning to resume his search. “He taught us how to fight and man a ship. He showed us the ways of being a pirate, and how to steal without getting caught, but he never showed much parental love or praise. I think I was just that kid with half a memory to him, but I guess I should be thankful. He gave me a home, after all.”

Yuuri exhaled a long breath through his nose. Too often did his father come up in a conversation in a less than positive light, and sometimes, Yuuri wished his father would remain just a memory – a past that they should let go.

He may have his own demons to fight, but his father never helped Victor with his own, and Yuuri’s heart ached when he said, “You’re more than someone with half a memory. You know that, right?”

“I know,” Victor nodded, and smiled. “I’m also your husband.”

“And?” Yuuri asked, encouraging him to continue.

“And I’m your first mate.”

It wasn’t enough. “Keep going.”

Victor hesitated for a moment. “And I’m a careful planner, and…”

“And you’re smart. You’re _brave_. You’re beautiful inside and out. You’re a man of wit, and you’re serious when you need to be. You know how to read people, how to assess a situation and think of a logical way around it. You’re an absolute goofball and you make me laugh so much. I could list off more, because Victor, you’re more than someone with half a memory. You’re more than my father’s crew and my first mate. You are so much more.”

Victor looked away before Yuuri could see a reaction, attempting to hide his face to possibly disguise the blush Yuuri caught creeping up his cheeks. He kept his eyes down, focused on the book in hand as if Yuuri’s words meant nothing, but alongside his blush was a sheepish smile – a grin that set Yuuri’s heart alight.

“I suppose you’re right,” Victor replied, his smile heard in his voice. “I’m not defined by my role but who I am as a person, right?”

“Exactly,” Yuuri agreed. “I’m not just a Captain, and you’re not just a man with half a memory. My father never bothered to see past that, and he didn’t know what he was missing.”

For the moment their eyes met, Yuuri didn’t want to look away, but Victor soon hummed in response and turned back to browse for another book. He was glad Victor did, in a way. His father really did miss out on an incredible person, and that was his own loss, but Yuuri didn’t wish to talk more about his father. It seemed Victor didn’t either.

“I’m really enjoying this, you know.”

Victor paused. “Watching me choose a book?”

“No – well, yes, but…” he paused, exhaling a breath. “I mean this going exactly the way we planned. It’s nice to be in control. All we did was tell them you’re the prince and they believed it without question. I’m really looking forward to this ball, now that I think about it. If we convince this kingdom that you’re the prince too, just imagine the _power_ we’d have. I don’t know how things work as a prince, but you’ll have an influence. We can use that to our advantage.”

“Dreaming big, I see.” Victor smiled, winking.

“I always dream big, but so do you,” Yuuri pointed out, and although Victor didn’t deny the statement, he knew it was true. “I keep thinking of what I’d like to steal. There’s been a few things I’ve seen that we could sell for a lot, but honestly, I won’t be happy unless I have a crown.”

“A crown?” Victor laughed as he placed his final book on his pile to join Yuuri sat on the desk. “I’ve been wondering if the prince had one himself. They might show it to me eventually, and when they do, it’s mine for the taking, right?”

“Exactly!” Yuuri grinned. “I wonder if you’ll need to wear one for this ball. I think you’d look rather dashing in a crown.”

“I’d rather not think what we’d have to wear after seeing the state of our wardrobe,” Victor frowned, shuddering at the memory. “But anyway, if they don’t crown me at some point, I’m sure if I gain enough trust as a prince, I can just walk in and request the King’s crown without needing to sneak around, but we have to find it first.”

“You can use your status to your advantage,” Yuuri pointed out before letting out a cheer of delight. “This is going so well!”

“For our final attempt at stealing treasure it’s going stupidly well,” Victor laughed, “but I’m glad we did this.”

Their conversation fell short as Victor picked up a book from the pile, eyes scanning the words on a random page he flipped to. And Yuuri watched, because he liked to watch his husband when he had the chance. Victor was always quite the beauty, and seeing that up close only reinforced that truth. His ocean blue eyes held such an intelligence and serenity that it was impossible not to be held prisoner by them, and when he smiled and laughed, Yuuri couldn’t help but smile along too.

His husband was beautiful in more ways than he could count, and though Yuuri was not one for textbook definitions, it still surprised him that not even ‘beautiful’ was enough to describe Victor.

“How has your day been?” Yuuri found himself asking, lost in a trance before he could stop his stupid question from slipping out.

And Victor looked up, surprised by the question. “You should know,” he stated, “I’ve been with you the entire day.”

“I’d still like to hear it.”

Victor smiled and placed the book down. “Well, I woke up next to the most beautiful man this morning,” he mused, moving to his feet and standing between Yuuri’s legs, arms draped and fingers linked over his shoulders. “We ate some lovely food for breakfast, had a romantic walk around the garden, and I wondered how I was so lucky to have married a man like him.”

“You’re so cheesy sometimes.” Yuuri grinned, hands on Victor’s waist to pull him closer. “But I like it.”

There was no chance for a kiss when a faint knock at the door startled them, both turning to see the intruder who disturbed their moment. It was the same guard from before whose name Yuuri almost forgot. He was slightly out of breath, but disguised it with a tall stance as he stepped inside the room.

“Your majesty,” he spoke, eyes directly onto Victor as he stepped forward. “I’ve been looking all over for you. You’re certainly not the easiest person to find.”

“We’ve just been… adventuring around the castle,” Victor told, which wasn’t a lie, but there was a truth hidden between his words that neither intended to tell. “Is something wrong? You seem a little out of breath.”

“It’s not an easy task searching through every room to find you,” he admitted, exhaling as he tried to catch his breath. “The Queen wishes for me to pass on a message. Your father, the King, is on his way home.”

There was a moment of silence.

“What?”

“The King?” Yuuri questioned, and when Otabek nodded, Yuuri’s stomach twisted into nervous knots. The Queen was one thing; she was kind, gullible, and easy to deal with, but the King, however, could be completely different. He might see through their act, or claim Victor isn’t their son, and everything that had been going so right could go horribly wrong so soon.

He thought he was prepared for this. He expected better of himself, but his nerves ate away at his chest, merciless as they bit and tugged.

“He should return home in a couple of weeks,” the guard continued as _if_ this was supposed to be exciting news. “This means preparation for the Queen’s ball will begin taking place. It may seem like there’s a lot to learn, if you haven’t already, but don’t worry too much. If you can dance and eat with the correct cutlery, you’ll be fine.”

“Thank you for the advice,” Victor said, and as Otabek nodded, he left the room without another word, leaving the two with their thoughts – but neither said a word. Victor turned to Yuuri, hands already grasping Yuuri’s own tightly in nerves, and Yuuri knew he had to say something.

“We’ll be fine,” he promised. “I’m nervous too, but we’ll be fine.”

He wasn’t entirely sure if he believed himself, but Victor exhaled a breath as he nodded, and that had to be enough.

 

* * *

 

 

_Victor had technique._

_His father demanded they fight. Yuuri wasn’t particularly fond of his father’s decision, but he never argued. He grabbed his sword, faced Victor with a deep breath, and they sparred, just like Victor and his father did days before._

_Yuuri won, which was expected. He had far more experience, and while he couldn’t defeat his father or his crew, Victor wasn’t much of a match. He was scared more than anything, but he had strength, and will to keep going. Yuuri admired that._

_And his father demanded they fight, over and over again until Yuuri’s fingers bled from broken blisters and Victor collapsed on the floor, exhausted from the day of continuous fighting. He helped him to his feet. He fed Victor and stayed with him until he was able to walk again, guilt eating away at his soul because he should’ve stopped his father. He should have said something. He had every right to call it quits, but he never did; and yet he suspected if he tried, his father wouldn’t be so fond of him for a few days._

_The fighting didn’t stop. When Victor was on his feet, they were sparring again, swords in hands and a lesson to be learned. Yuuri could tell Victor didn’t want this. He just wanted to stay alive, not fight a losing battle, but weeks went by. A month had passed, and while Victor hadn’t won once, Yuuri noted his technique. He was getting better, to Yuuri’s surprise._

_Victor didn’t use brute force like the first mate. He didn’t use skill like his father. He wasn’t even using the same fighting technique Yuuri used, a mixture of all until he found his true calling. Victor analysed. He used his brain, logically deducing what move would be made next and how to counter it by observing his fighter’s technique, and it was working. He almost caught Yuuri off guard. He nearly defeated him one evening, using Yuuri’s own techniques against him. He was proud of Victor. He was stupidly proud of him, but he couldn’t have him defeating him in a fight just yet._

_Victor was smart. He was smart and determined and Yuuri would be lying if he said it didn’t make him want to blush, but he was a pirate. Pirates didn’t blush over a stupid crush._

_“Yuuri!” his father shouted, startling him one evening from eating. He didn’t need to say anymore. Yuuri was already on his feet, rushing to his father’s side. “Follow me.”_

_He was guided out onto the deck, alone. There were no other crew in sight, all eating before they’d soon leave to indulge in some rum. Yuuri was too young for that, but Victor should be out soon. Yuuri looked behind him, hopeful he’ll make an appearance before he said the wrong thing to his father, but he never arrived and Yuuri’s heart raced. It was never good news when his father wished to speak with him alone._

_“I’ve noticed the boy’s been improving,” he commented, and Yuuri chewed on his lip. “He’s developing a technique. I’m not sure how well it’d be against myself, but it seems to be countering you, at times. Are you not practicing?”_

_“I am,” Yuuri argued. “I’ve been practicing alone, and with Victor when we fight. He’s… good. It’s almost like he’s just out of practice, but he’s gotten himself a good technique and it’s hard to fight against that when I’m not certain of my own.”_

_When his father exhaled a sigh, Yuuri’s fists clenched tightly, already preparing himself for a scolding he didn’t wish to hear._

_“What did I tell you?” his father asked. Yuuri didn’t want to listen. “You don’t decide for yourself on your technique. You let it find you, and you stick with it. You should know yourself better than anyone else, and if that boy who hardly remembers a thing can already defeat you in a fight_ – _”_

_“But he hasn’t,” Yuuri cut him off, “and he won’t. At least, not yet. He’s good. He’s probably a natural born fighter, but he won’t defeat me just yet. I’ll keep practicing and I’ll keep fighting. I’ll prove myself worthy because I know I can do it, and I know I’ll find my technique.”_

_His father said nothing for a moment, but when he smiled, Yuuri resisted the urge to yell at him. He patted Yuuri on the head, allowing him to smack his hand away, but that didn’t encourage his father to frown. He looked down at him. He smiled, still, shaking his head as he walked away from his son._

_Yuuri’s fists clenched into tight balls, nails digging into his skin. His father didn’t believe in him. He laughed at his determined claim, but Yuuri would prove him wrong. Victor may have a good technique, but Yuuri had experience. He’d help Victor become a better fighter. He had no doubt in that, but he wouldn’t defeat Yuuri in a fight just yet. He wouldn’t accept that._

_And as Yuuri picked up his sword, he clasped it tightly. He wouldn’t let anyone defeat him. He’d refuse to back down, no matter what._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this was one hell of a monster chapter and I think only like, 2000 words of this is relevant to the plot. I was going to split it into two chapters and post two close together, but I thought eh, just upload the entire thing. I've made ya'll wait 12 days for this, you're getting a mega chapter
> 
> But like i always say, this fic is writing itself. These boys just want to be gay and romantic and talk all the time and I have no reason to stop them at this point XD It's becoming pure self-indulgence, but it's slowly moving its way to the main plot. Perhaps I should've tagged this fic a slow burn XD
> 
> Also phichit man what did i do to him, but expect more Phichit/Yuri conversations soon! These two have something to develop, and pasts to reveal. They're both hot-headed but they gotta look past their differences to realize they're not entirely different after all. Stay tuned! 
> 
> hope you all like it. Comments and kudos feed my soul <3 Thank you!


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Love you izzy <3
> 
>  
> 
> Also, there's some smut in this chapter... sorta. Between ##### is the skip by!

The King’s arrival was something Yuuri anticipated, and in more ways than just one.

He wasn’t afraid. Captain Yuuri Katsuki feared no man who used sovereignty as a war tactic, or any royal for that matter. He’d be no different to the Queen or any duke or duchess he had yet to meet, and although Yuuri hated to admit it, he was still nervous. It was a lot to take in. This was the _King_ after all, and he had no choice but to wait.

He was curious to see the King’s reaction to Victor and how accepting he’d be that Victor was their son. The Queen welcomed him with open arms, but the King may be different. He could be stubborn. He may not believe it, or refuse to accept Victor as anything but a traveller. Where it could go right, it could also go horribly wrong. Yuuri just hoped their luck hadn’t run out yet.

But where his nerves ate away at his chest, Yuuri noticed something. There was a strange shift in the air, one he couldn’t put his finger on. It was like a heaviness had swept across the kingdom, a weight pressing down on his chest that had him wonder if it was just his nerves getting the better of him. But the feeling felt universal. It seemed to affect everyone.

Nobody said anything. There wasn’t a soul that even hinted at the possibility that Yuuri wasn’t going crazy, but he felt it so _strongly_ in his gut, it screaming at him that something wasn’t right, but it made no sense to him. There was no reason behind the feeling. He couldn’t place his finger on it nor find one specific reason why it was torturing him this way, and Yuuri was at a loss. He didn’t know what to think.

And during one evening in bed, his mindless thoughts wandered when Yuuri found himself asking, “Do you feel as weird as I do?”

He was quick to bite his tongue, but not fast enough to stop himself from asking. He shouldn’t have said anything, but his words were out. He couldn’t take them back, and Victor’s raised brow didn’t help the embarrassment burning his cheeks.

“What do you mean?” Victor asked, suddenly sat up with his palm pressed against Yuuri’s forehead, but Yuuri pushed it out the way. He didn’t need Victor questioning him. He wasn’t even sure how to answer him. “Are you unwell?”

“No, I’m not sick,” Yuuri corrected, shaking his head. “I’m just… confused by something.”

He didn’t want to talk about it. He just wanted to word-vomit to his husband over something that didn’t make sense, and not expect an answer in return. He didn’t need Victor to find a solution. He just wanted to talk and hopefully find his own answer somewhere along the way, or learn to accept that he may never know, and that it was okay not to know.

But Victor was silent for a moment, thinking over Yuuri’s question. He almost wanted to tell him to just let it go, that he was being silly and he’s probably just worrying over nothing. He did that sometimes, but Victor didn’t let things go so easily. Yuuri appreciated the concern. He forever adored his husband caring about him, but he didn’t always wish for answers. He just wanted to ramble.

“I’m not entirely sure how to help you here, Yuuri.”

“That’s fine,” Yuuri nodded, exhaling a long breath. “I’m not really sure myself. I can’t make sense of it, but I don’t really want you to help me find an answer. I just want to talk it out. Maybe I can find a solution that way, or learn to let it go.”

“If you just want to talk, you can talk,” Victor told him, his supportive grip tightening around Yuuri’s thigh. “I won’t stop you.”

Yuuri swallowed thickly. He wasn’t entirely sure where to begin, but he supposed the basics was a start when he found himself saying, “It feels like there’s this strange atmosphere, like a shadow is towering over me and I can’t outrun it.”

He paused for a moment, watching Victor’s reaction. He didn’t give much away. He hardly reacted, but Yuuri saw his brows drop – out of curiosity or judgement, Yuuri didn’t know, but he didn’t wish to continue watching his husband. He wasn’t sure how he’d feel if he believed Victor thought he was going insane.

“It’s not just me,” Yuuri continued, eyes turned and away from Victor. “It feels like it’s affected everyone, like it’s spread across the kingdom and I’m not the only one feeling it, but I can’t put my finger on _why_. I know the King’s returning, and I think that might be it, but it doesn’t seem to add up. I’m not afraid of him. I’m hardly scared because what can he do to us? But I just… I don’t know what to feel about this shift, or whether it’s something I should be afraid of. Do you understand?”

“I must admit, I don’t believe I do,” Victor admitted, head bowed in defeat. “I’ve not been feeling that, but more… familiarity.”

Yuuri’s brows hang low. “Familiarity?”

“Like I’ve been here before,” he continued. “I see things that look familiar. I enter new rooms and it’s like I’ve been there before. It’s strange, but I know they’re not real. I’ve never been here before. I hardly know my way around, yet I feel like I’ve been here? It doesn’t make sense, but it doesn’t bother me because I know my truth. Perhaps it’s the same for you?”

Yuuri thought about it for a moment. It didn’t feel the same. His feeling wasn’t familiarity, but unnerving dread and, dare he say, _fear_. It didn’t feel right, whatever it was, and Yuuri’s issue was that he couldn’t tell what was his truth.

“No,” he said, shaking his head. “No, it’s… it’s not that.”

Victor’s silent for a moment.

“Then perhaps it’s the King’s return that’s causing it?” he tried, a new suggestion on the table for Yuuri to deny. “ If I’m honest, I’m a little nervous about it too. You’re not worried about your scar, are you?”

“No, it’s not the scar,” Yuuri denied. His scar hadn’t bothered him for a while now, confident Phichit’s lucky bandana was doing its work, but rejecting that suggestion didn’t do enough to help Yuuri feel content. It wasn’t his nerves – he knew that much. It was something _more_. “I can’t explain it better than that. I know what’s not causing it, but I can’t figure out exactly what is. My gut has been telling me something too, but it doesn’t make sense. It’s not telling me something bad will happen, but I know this feeling isn’t good either. I don’t really know what to think, or assume, and it feels like everything is slipping out of my grip again. I hate this. I just… I hate feeling so powerless over myself.”

He heard Victor sigh as he sat up, hands scrubbing over his face. His head was a spinning mess, uncertain what to think or assume or do, and Yuuri despised this. The plan was going well. Everything worked out the way he had hoped, even going against the _odds_ , but it wasn’t enough. He still worried over something so insignificant and _pointless_. He didn’t know what to do.

His obsession for control would be his downfall. Yuuri knew that, but control meant success and success was all Yuuri strived for.

When he felt Victor’s fingers wrap around his wrist, he allowed his husband to pull his hands away. He didn’t wish to look up, but Victor always caught his eye, and Yuuri’s heart skipped a beat when he pressed a gentle kiss to the scar on his wrist.

“You are not powerless, Yuuri,” Victor told him, soft fingers stroking up and down his arm. “You’re in control, even when you don’t know it. How you’re feeling doesn’t change anything. It doesn’t diminish our luck, either. Do you remember me telling you, if anything goes wrong, I know you’ll get us out of it?”

Yuuri swallowed thickly as he nodded. “I do.”

“I still wholeheartedly believe that,” Victor told him, hands lacing with Yuuri’s in a tight, supportive grip. “I know how easy it is to believe something will go wrong, and I’d be lying if I said I didn’t feel the same. This plan has been going unbelievably well, but we’re in control of this. We’re in control of our destiny, and whether that’s to get our gold or none at all, I know no matter the outcome, we’ll be leaving this place _together_ , and that’s what matters to me the most.”

Yuuri exhaled a breathy laugh, shaking his head as he did. “That’s important to me too,” he said, “and perhaps you’re right, but it doesn’t explain this feeling. It doesn’t help me make sense of it.”

“I thought you didn’t want me to help you find an answer?”

“I – I didn’t,” he stammered. “I don’t. I just… I hoped you might’ve had an answer that I couldn’t find. You’re usually the one to work it out.”

Victor laughed lightly. “I can only help where I can,” he said, hand cupping Yuuri’s cheek as his thumb stroked over his cheekbone. “I can’t control how the plan may go, but I know for certain we’ll be okay. There’s only one way to go from here and that’s up. Nobody will get in our way. You’re the one to always say that, remember?”

He remembered, but that didn’t mean he always believed his own words.

But sure, it helped him feel better. It never explained his confusion. It didn’t lift the pressure from his chest or change the strange feeling that had no meaning or answer to it, just another confusing thing for Yuuri to work out, but he felt just that little bit better. While things almost remained the same, being in Victor’s presence made it easier to breathe. He could exhale a breath, turn to his husband, and remind himself that he was Captain Yuuri Katsuki. He’d gotten them out of worse, and he’d be damned if he didn’t do it again.

And Yuuri soon found himself smiling. His crew may believe in him, but nobody ever showed as much support as his husband. It was always Victor who told him he was admired and respected by his crew. It was Victor who believed in him, in more ways than he could count, and each time always reminded Yuuri how much he loved his husband.

“I don’t tell you that I love you as often as I should.

He didn’t express that often enough, but now was better than never.

“You don’t have to,” Victor replied, smiling as they kissed. “I already know.”

 

* * *

 

 

The days continued, and Yuuri anticipated the unknown with vague lies to help himself feel better.

There were enough distractions to keep his mind occupied, to Yuuri’s relief. The entirety of the castle was busy preparing for the ball. The King, so the Queen said, would return within three weeks, and that meant Victor and Yuuri had less than that to learn the ‘appropriate’ ways of being a high-class royal.

There was so much to do, too much to learn, but the Queen stayed true to her word. The ball was being planned and they were quickly thrown into a world so alien to them, but Yuuri tried to take pleasure in the learning experience. It was the perfect distraction, but absolute _stress_. He tried hard not to complain.

There were times where he wished they stuck with the ransom instead. It would have been fun escaping their army and destroying the kingdom. Yuuri daydreamed about it often, canons crumbling the castle walls and screams being heard from his ship, but those were just fantasies.

They had too much to do, and on their list was meeting with a tailor to get some outfits made. They met a man named Chris; overly flirtatious in Yuuri’s opinion, but he and Victor got on well for too many reasons. Yuuri couldn’t say he was a fan, but if that was from his own opinion or jealousy, he wouldn’t answer if someone asked.

“You know, usually I have to decorate these folks in bright colours to show off their wealth, but I have a feeling you two are far more subtle than that,” Chris said after measuring them, finger against his lip in thought as he scanned their clothes.

Yuuri felt like he was being undressed, but his unamused composure seemed to turn Chris’ gaze away, except it went onto his husband instead. He gripped Victor’s arm, gold ring on show to make a point, not that the man seemed to notice – or Victor, for that matter.

“I guess you could say that,” Victor commented with a grin. “I don’t mind. As long as we look good, we’re happy. Just don’t make us look like clowns.”

“You’d look good no matter what I dress you in.” Chris smiled, offering a wink in return.

He never caught Yuuri’s glare, turning just as he shot daggers at the man, but Yuuri made sure Victor remembered he was there by his tight grip on his arm. Victor never looked at him. He kept his head up, ignoring Yuuri’s possessive grasp as the man continued, “I’m thinking fine silks for you both. Maybe velvet. That’s always a fan favourite.”

“Just make sure you dress us in something good,” Yuuri spoke, voice clear as day. “I’m excited to see how handsome my _husband_ will be.”

Then their eyes met. Yuuri raised a brow at Victor in silent question, but his husband only smiled. He patted the hand gripping him tightly, almost to tell Yuuri not to worry – but Yuuri always worried. Victor was beautiful. He always had people drooling over him or trying to start something regardless of the gold ring and husband by his side. It was like the woman in the tavern all over again.

He wished it never happened, _especially_ while he was present, but Yuuri trusted Victor wholeheartedly. Nothing could come from the man’s playful flirting. Victor was right... He shouldn’t worry. So he exhaled a long breath, told himself to let it go, and watched as the man returned with a handful of colourful cloths.

“I found it!” Chris declared, stepping over to Victor first – to Yuuri’s annoyance. He picked out two pieces of cloth from his pile and raised it to Victor’s chest, taking a moment to think about it, humming loudly before announcing, “I think gold and purple suits you best.”

Yuuri may not like the man that much, but he was right. The colours worked well with Victor, so much so that Yuuri imagined how he’d look the night of the ball. He would be beautiful no matter what he wore, but the mental image had him grinning like an idiot. He wasn’t sure what he was more excited about – the buffet of food, or Victor looking gorgeous as ever.

Okay, Victor won by a landslide, but he was still looking forward to the food.

“And as husbands, I’d like you two to have a colour scheme,” Chris then said, raising the same gold silk to Yuuri, but with a dark blue piece instead. “Blue and gold is your colour. It’ll work great as a pair, and it’ll match the gold rings too!”

At least he acknowledged the rings, but that still didn’t excuse the flirting.

They finished sooner than Yuuri expected, to his relief. He almost hoped they wouldn’t see Chris again, but Victor seemed eager to talk again, not that Yuuri had any right to complain about that. And Yuuri ignored Victor’s comment on his possessiveness when they left, turning his nose up at even the suggestion, but he didn’t ignore Victor’s subtle hint that he’d make it up to Yuuri the same way he did in the tavern. He paid attention to that, and wasted not a moment rushing up to their room.

They didn’t have as much free time as they used to. It was hard to find a moment to make love, or fool around as they wish. They were always called out for something, or too tired to do anything else, but they took advantage of their free time while it was there. He didn’t want to waste a moment.

Yuuri didn’t like that they were so busy, but understood why. If they wanted to keep up with the façade, sacrifices needed to be made, and there was still so much to learn – even when it felt like a waste of time, or pointless.

He understood why they needed to learn certain things, such as dressing in the appropriate manner or being a kind gentleman, one which _wasn’t_ rough around the edges. Yuuri had trouble with that. Victor picked up elegance better than he did, but Yuuri already thought he was dashing, and Victor’s charm helped his appeal. Yuuri on the other hand didn’t enjoy it too much, but he was getting there. It seemed easy after a while, and the ball didn’t appear so bad after all.

But then there were other things which Yuuri didn’t understand – that were pointless in comparison. He couldn’t explain the expectation to eat using the correct cutlery. One knife and fork should be enough. Being high-class was hard work, but that was nothing compared to their strict requirement to _dance_ – and not in the way Yuuri was used to.

He was very aware that where there was a ball, there’d be dancing, but swaying side to side with his husband didn’t satisfy their dance teacher one bit. She expected them to learn the routine, and it wasn’t as easy as Yuuri expected. The woman – Lilia Baranovskaya – was a passionate, strict teacher who reminded him of his father, and all enthusiasm to learn was gone, replaced with a pounding headache instead.

But he tried, because it was expected of them and Victor seemed to be enjoying himself – somehow.

“No, no, no! You’re doing it all wrong!” Her yell had Yuuri wince, each clap of her hands radiating pain throughout his skull, but it was almost nothing compared to the ache in his foot where Victor stepped on it for a fifth time. “You’re not in rhythm. You’re hardly following what I told you. You’re acting like you both have a pair of left feet!”

He couldn’t understand how Victor could nod and resume position. Yuuri had to resist the urge to yell back, biting his tongue to keep his vile words silent. Nobody had ever spoken to him like this, not since his father was Captain, but Yuuri reminded himself he wasn’t a Captain in the castle. He was a traveller, so biting his tongue was all he could do.

And besides, he didn’t feel like being involved in a screaming match just yet – not with his pounding headache. Maybe their next lesson, but not now.

“It’s been a while since we last danced,” Yuuri explained with a long sigh, and resumed position too. “But we’ve never done anything like this type of dancing.”

Lilia raised a brow. “When was the last time?”

“Yuuri, I don’t think we’ve ever danced,” Victor replied, genuine confusion spread across his face. Yuuri was the same for a moment, hurt that Victor had forgotten and taken back by his husband’s response.

“Victor, we danced on our wedding night.”

_Surely, he didn’t forget…_

“Wait, did we? I don’t remember – oh! Yeah!” Victor gasped, his memory finally catching up to him with bright eyes and a smile. “Yes, I remember now. Yeah, we just swayed side to side, didn’t we? It was late and there were candles lit, music playing. It was so romantic.”

Yuuri wanted to comment on it. He wanted to now yell at Victor for forgetting such an important part of their life, something so special to them, but just like with Lilia, he didn’t feel like getting involved in a fight. He knew his husband’s memory was terrible. It failed him in the worst ways, but that still didn’t make it hurt any less.

“I can’t believe you forgot that,” Yuuri commented, his voice harsher than he intended.

Victor didn’t say anything, but the wave of guilt in his eyes told Yuuri enough. He didn’t care anymore. He didn’t want to see anyone’s face, or hear their voice. He had no interest looking in the eyes of the man who forgot their wedding night, and Yuuri didn’t wish to be here any longer.

“Are we done?” Lilia asked, her patience wearing thin.

But Yuuri’s was thinner – hardly noticeable in comparison, and he raised his hands as he stepped away from Victor. “I’m done,” he announced, turning to walk away. “I’ll be back tomorrow or something.”

He never heard Lilia’s comment. He heard her voice, but not the words she spoke, which was probably for the best. He feared if he had, he might’ve snapped – but he did hear Victor calling for him. He heard his feet moving quickly behind him, but Yuuri moved just as fast, rushing out of the room and hopefully, away from his husband’s sights.

He had a nasty headache bothering him. He was upset, even when he shouldn’t have been. He just wanted to be left alone.

“Yuuri!” he heard Victor shout, his voice ringing in Yuuri’s brain and aching it in the worst ways. “Yuuri, just – just wait a second!”

He exhaled a breath and turned a corner quickly. He should hear Victor out, but he didn’t care to listen to any excuses or explanations. He needed to be gone, but Victor’s tight grasp at his wrist stopped him in his tracks. He spun, shooting a glare at his husband who moved him aside and into an empty room.

“Yuuri!” Victor scrambled, closing the door before turning, hands on his shoulders to keep him in place. “Yuuri, I just – can I just – I’m sorry for–”

“Forgetting, I know,” Yuuri answered with a sigh, knocking Victor’s hands off his shoulders. “I get it. Really. You’re always forgetting things, even when they’re important. It’s nothing new and I shouldn’t be upset over that.”

“You… didn’t have to say it like that,” Victor frowned with a flash of hurt on his face, but Yuuri didn’t know what to say. “But you should be upset. I – I know I have a terrible memory. I know my amnesia makes it hard for me to remember things, and that I forget a lot from time to time, but it’s no excuse. I’m sorry.”

But it _was_ an excuse – a reason he couldn’t help. Yuuri knew that. Victor’s amnesia made his memory terrible from the start. Always. He forgot silly little things, or important memories like their first kiss, or their wedding day. He’d forget for a moment, sometimes for a while, but he’d remember eventually. He always pulled through, and Yuuri knew he was getting frustrated over nothing.

But his pounding headache made it hard to forgive him, and the temptation to yell was appealing. Yuuri held his tongue. He looked away, exhaling a long breath to ease the tension inside his skull.

“I know, Victor,” he said, hopeful he’d be able to turn and leave straight after. “It’s fine.”

“I just want to make sure you know that I’m sorry.”

And Yuuri sighed again. “Look, Victor… I love you. I always will, but I just want to be alone for a while, alright?”

Victor nodded, but when those two words came out of his mouth again, muttering under his breath, “ _I’m sorry_ ,” Yuuri’s mind snapped like an elastic band – fast and harsh, and there was no turning back.

“Just – just stop!” he shouted, causing Victor to flinch, almost like he raised a threatening hand. “I told you it’s fine so just stop it. God, I know your memory is shit but you can’t have forgotten that already. I want to be alone for a while so can you just back off?”

A bitter laugh escaped Victor’s lips, almost unfazed by Yuuri’s comment, but he knew his husband. He was raised a pirate too, and neither were taught to take that kind of abuse. They were taught to argue with words that packed a powerful punch, then unsheathe their swords if necessary.

“Yuuri, you’re being real fucking nasty,” Victor bit back, a sharp scowl on his lips to hide the hurt threatening to expose itself.

“I’m a _Captain_ , Victor,” Yuuri reminded him harshly, “It’s nothing new, or did you forget that too?”

His words flew from his mouth that he never thought to think, let alone say out loud. He knew tension was high, and he should inject love instead of anger, but it wasn’t always that easy. His cold fury burned with dangerous intensity, and Yuuri knew from the look on Victor’s face that he hit a nerve.

But Victor knew how to hit his, and without a single hint of mercy, Victor replied, “You should have just stayed on the ship.”

And like a fire, Yuuri burned.

“Whatever,” he snapped, tearing from Victor’s glare as he stormed away. “Find your way to your room yourself. I’m going for a walk.”

That was the breaking point of his patience, and Yuuri stormed throughout the castle with heavy feet. His head pounded with the memory of Victor’s words, pain radiating through his skull with each step, so harsh that he needed to stop. He sat on the ground in a dark room. He curled up in a tight ball, fingers gripping his locks and desperate to ease his anger, to rest his mind, and cure his headache the only way he knew how.

It was hard. He swallowed back the anger like he was gasping for a few drops of something cool, but he had nothing to stop the fire raging in his mind. It came out as hot as a dragon’s flame, burning rage directly towards the person he loved the most. He’d never forget Victor’s eyes, how it burned him, left him in pain as Yuuri stood back and allowed it to sizzle.

It was more than his heart could manage, knowing he hurt Victor that way, and as Yuuri’s headache settled, it hit him just how awful he’d been. In his rage, he was blind. He blamed Victor for something that was absolutely not his fault, and Yuuri knew Victor forgot things. He knew that better than anyone, but instead of expressing love, he set off like a tornado. He wreaked havoc between them.

He may have every right to feel upset, especially the night Victor forgot, but Yuuri had no reason to bite the way he had. There was no excuse to insult him how he did - or blame him for forgetting.

Yuuri acted just like his father, and that hurt the most. He was an awful person, a terrible Captain, and the worst husband.

He should apologize, but finding the right words proved a challenge. He wasn’t entirely sure where to begin, or how to explain himself, and the last remnants of his headache didn’t help. He took a stroll through the gardens, roaming around for a breath of fresh air and allowing the last of his headache to ease before finally making his way to their bedroom.

He exhaled a heavy breath, nerves quaking his bones. Victor could still be mad at him. He didn’t expect his husband to forgive him entirely, but he knew what to say. He was ready, and when he knocked on the door, hearing Victor’s sweet voice call, “Come in,” Yuuri’s heart soared.

He opened the door, poking his head around the corner. Victor was sat on their bed with his arms crossed. He had a frown on his face, but he was looking Yuuri’s way, and he took that as a good sign. At least Victor acknowledged him – it’d be worse if he hadn’t.

“Hey,” he muttered, head bowed. “I’m not sure if I’m welcomed yet, but I can come back later.”

When Yuuri looked up, he was still being watched, but the nod of Victor’s head told him he was allowed inside. Perhaps not for touching – no matter how desperate Yuuri was to hug Victor and apologize – but granted access to come in and talk. Which was fine; that was all Yuuri needed.

But being stood there, all words left him. Victor always told him communication was key, and Yuuri agreed with him, but that didn’t mean he could always explain himself with ease. It was embarrassing, admitting his faults. He never knew how Victor could do it so easily, but it didn’t matter. He was here to apologize.

He stepped forward, coming closer to Victor, whose eyes never left him. He stood beside him for a moment, looking at the spot next to Victor and silently requesting to sit down. He nodded, and Yuuri sat, but it still didn’t help him find his words again.

“Listen, Victor, I…”

“I know,” Victor began, interrupting his apology. He turned his head away, eyes cast to the floor and all Yuuri could feel was tension in the air, thick and heavy as it weighed down in his mind. “I don’t think I want to hear you explain yourself. I just… hate the things you said, and I can’t stop thinking about them.”

And guilt ate away at his chest, gnawing and biting, tugging his heart in all directions. He should still say something, even if Victor didn’t wish to hear it, but an apology didn’t feel like enough anymore. He wished to do more to make it up to Victor, but he wasn’t sure what else to do – how else he could show Victor that he was truly sorry for what was said, and done.

“I know,” Yuuri spoke, his voice weak and frail, barely above a whisper. “Me too.”

When their eyes met, that tension faded. An aching loss replaced it, filling his being with a desperate need and Yuuri didn’t know who moved first, but it didn’t matter. Their arms wrapped around each other, heads buried and fingers grasping to hold on tighter. Victor’s body was so familiar to him; their time apart had been short, yet Yuuri already missed it – the feel of his embrace, his tight muscles, and the sound of his beating heart made Yuuri wish for forgiveness even more.

“I’m sorry,” he muttered against Victor’s neck, and breathed in the familiar scent of his husband – the sweet, alluring aroma as he tightened the embrace. “I’m so, _so_ sorry.”

He almost wanted to cry – he nearly did, but a heavy breath held back his tears. He wished for nothing more than for Victor’s forgiveness, but crying would do him no good. There’s no sympathy in tears, only pity, and Yuuri didn’t dare ask for Victor’s pity. That was no way to apologize for what he did.

But then Victor pulled back, hands cradling Yuuri’s head with an intensity in his stare. There was a fire in his eyes – passion and desire, burning high as he kissed Yuuri’s lips hard. He gasped in the touch, startled, but never hesitated to delve into the touch, allowing Victor to pull him onto the bed as he drew back for a breath.

“You better make it up to me.”

 

######

 

“I will,” Yuuri said with a gasp, nodding frantically before planting soft kisses along Victor’s neck. “I will, I will. I’ll do whatever you wish. I’ll touch you however you desire. Just tell me what you want, and I’ll do it, Victor.”

He never anticipated their talk to go like this, not with Yuuri’s hands dipping beneath Victor’s shirt, gentle fingertips slowly trailing up his stomach before pulling off his shirt. He expected Victor to be angry with him – and perhaps he still was with the way he made demands – but this was better than any talk or apology. He’d prove himself to Victor. He didn’t need words to express himself, just touches would do, and that was all Victor seemed to care for.

They’d have their talk eventually, but right now, Victor wanted Yuuri to touch him. And he would, he’d treat Victor the way he deserved – like the Prince he was.

“You could suck me off,” Victor gasped as Yuuri mouthed at the base of his neck, and he already began moving down when Victor stopped him, “but I don’t want that. I don’t want to do all the way, either.”

Yuuri swallowed thickly as he nodded, and pressed kisses along his stomach. “What is it you want?”

“Just touch me,” Victor settled with. “And maybe touch yourself too, if I’m feeling generous, but touch me and only me.”

“I’ll never take my eyes off you,” Yuuri said, splayed fingers caressing along his skin, enticing a soft breath to escape Victor’s lips. He couldn’t help but kiss them – slow and sweet, hands coming up to the back of his neck as he kissed him again. “I’ll touch you, and love you, and treat you the way you deserve.”

And Yuuri kissed him. He touched Victor like he was a man starved for it, brushing delicate fingers through his hair before trailing his fingertips down his arms, splayed hands stroking across his stomach then moving further down to caress the inside of his thighs, never leaving a part of Victor untouched. He planted kisses where he touched, loving every inch of his husband who took Yuuri’s frustration, who listened to his vile words, but Yuuri would make it up to him. He’d replace those words with kisses – cleanse them with nothing but praise, admiration, and everything his husband deserved.

“You’re so wonderful, Victor,” Yuuri whispered as he kissed Victor’s neck, gently pushing his body into his. He heard a soft moan, but Yuuri craved for more – craved for _him_. “You’re so smart and amazing. You’re talented and brilliant and so, so beautiful. I’m so lucky to have you in my life.”

He wasn’t sure if it was his words that set Victor off, or the way he pressed forward again, but Victor met him halfway, fingers sunk into his locks and pulling Yuuri in for a bruising kiss. His tongue tasted Yuuri’s, and Yuuri could feel the desperation in his hands, his tight grasp to hold him close and the willpower it took him to hold back, but Yuuri didn’t want him to. He wished for him to let go, to take pleasure in his own way.

And Victor did, eventually. They slipped out of their trousers; naked bodies pressed together as he finally allowed Yuuri to touch himself too. His fingers wrapped around both their cocks, hot breaths touching each other’s lips and soft, deep kisses shared as he stroked them to their climax. Moans filled the room, the only sound wishing to be heard to replace the nasty words Yuuri spoke before – and their eyes never turned away, not even for a second.

Yuuri was all worn down and tired by the end of it as the two cuddled close on the bed. They were still a mess. The air smelled of sweat and sex, but neither wished to move just yet. Yuuri wouldn’t let Victor go if he did. He wished to stay like this for a little while longer, to forget that he still had to talk to Victor and stay in this moment forever.

But Yuuri couldn’t. They had commitments, responsibilities, and a ball slowly creeping its way towards them. He had to talk to Victor, get his emotions off his chest, and push back the embarrassment burning his cheeks at just the _thought_ of expressing himself. He was more mature than this.

 

#####

 

“I had a headache,” he began, and it sounded as stupid as he expected – but it was out now. He might as well keep going. “Lilia was throwing a lot at us, and her teaching style wasn’t something I enjoyed. She reminded me of my father… in all the worst ways.”

“She certainly had that demanding vibe he had, didn’t she?” Victor said, turning to look at him. Yuuri didn’t respond, but he suspected Victor already knew that as he continued, “How did that turn into… well.”

“I was close to yelling at her. It’s been a long time since someone spoke to me like that, and alongside the headache, it… had me frustrated,” he said, explaining himself the best he could. “Then you forgot our wedding night and that made me really angry. I just wanted to be left alone after that, but you kept on apologizing, and I was telling myself that I was over it, that I’m fine, but I wasn’t. I snapped at you and it wasn’t fair. You didn’t deserve that.”

“You’re right, I didn’t,” Victor agreed. Yuuri didn’t need to be told twice. “I know it’s an important night for you. It means just as much to me too. I knew you were upset and you had every right to be, but it stopped feeling like you were upset with that. It was more like you needed a reason to be angry, and I so happened to be there when you needed to yell.”

“And that wasn’t fair on you,” Yuuri said, repeating himself. “You’re my husband. You deserve more.”

“You certainly made it up to me just now,” Victor said, laughing lightly, but Yuuri still felt reluctant to smile. “I’m still a little mad at you, and upset by the things you said, but I know you didn’t mean it.”

“I didn’t,” Yuuri agreed, head bowed. “But I can’t take it back.”

“That’s the hardest part about an apology,” Victor said, fingers cupping Yuuri’s cheek and tilting his head upwards, allowing their eyes to meet. “It’ll take a little while for me to forgive and forget, but I accept your apology.”

“Thank you,” Yuuri said, biting his lip as their foreheads pressed together. “ _Thank you…_ ”

“I still love you, though,” Victor grinned before kissing him. “Let’s just get through this ball.”

“Yes, definitely,” Yuuri nodded and finally, he smiled. “And I love you too.”

 

* * *

 

_“Everyone, prepare yourselves!”_

_His father’s scream was loud, but it was nothing compared to the deafening explosion behind him._

_Yuuri ran, ears ringing with his fingers clasped tightly around the hilt of his sword. He watched unfamiliar men board his father’s ship. He eyed their swords in despair, listened to their cheers as their Captain made demands, and watched as his father made the first attack – striking their Captain with the intention to kill._

_And Yuuri watched with his heart in his throat. He may have been well prepared for this – taught and trained to fight anyone who dare wished death upon him – but he was still a child, and Yuuri became painfully aware of that with his shaking fingers, his quaking heart._

_But he would fight. It was expected of him, and as much as Yuuri wished he could hide, he wasn’t one to run away. He was better than that._

_He stood his ground with his blade held even, always levelled with the nose, just as his father had taught him. He prepared for when the first rival pirate came striding towards him, and Yuuri fought with every inch of his life. He stalled the man’s strike, but watched a wicked grin stretch on the pirate’s lips as his blade trembled under his brutal strength._

_“A weapon like this doesn’t belong in the hands of a child,” the man smiled a toothy grin, as if he’d already won, but Yuuri wasn’t done until he was dead. “So, which one’s your father, or is Captain Katsuki pawning off children now?”_

_Yuuri never had the chance to bite back a response. His words were ready, prepared to fight fire with fire when the faint glint of a sword was seen, stopping his words as the man dropped to the ground, blood spilling beneath. Yuuri stared in pale horror, the thick scent of death filling his nose as he turned his gaze to his father standing before him._

_“Just this once, Yuuri,” the Captain warned him, a blood-covered finger raised. “I’m not here to babysit you.”_

_“I can fight for myself!” Yuuri yelled back, but whether his father heard him or not was left unknown, ignored as he turned to make another attack._

_He grumbled to himself, frustrated how his father took his kill away from him with continued doubt. He could do it; Yuuri knew he could, and he’d prove his father wrong as he wasted not a second finding a reason to attack someone else. He fought with reckless abandon, clanging swords and slaughter heard, chaos surrounding him with every turn._

_And although Victor had been with them for a year, Yuuri still turned to check on him. He watched him fight like he’s known it for years. He admired Victor’s bravery, no hesitation as he swung his sword and rushed to make another attack. It was hard to tear his eyes away from him – silver locks easy to find, but beauty was captivating and it’d be the death of Yuuri if he didn’t look away._

_A pleasant death it may be, but he suspected Victor would rather him live than die by looking at him._

_“Yuuri!” His father’s yell startled him from his thoughts. “Just get yourself and the boy underdeck now. I don’t want you hurting yourself!”_

_“But–!”_

_“Now, Yuuri!”_

_It was the doubt again – the disbelief that Yuuri could stand his own ground. He had no energy to argue anymore, exhausted in every way as he spun and rushed towards Victor. He grabbed his wrist, tugging him away from the pirate threatening to harm him but was quickly distracted by another fight._

_He ignored Victor’s protests, his father’s demands fresh on his mind, and guided him away from the fight, weaving through the mess of swords and blood as he took Victor underdeck where the battle was hidden, muffled by wooden walls. He moved onwards, his goal on his father’s bedchambers – an easy place to hide out._

_“He sent us down here, didn’t he?” he heard Victor ask. Yuuri stopped him his tracks, but he didn’t dare turn, unable to meet his stare. “He didn’t want us fighting.”_

_“He didn’t, no,” Yuuri muttered, inhaling a breath as he turned. “He said he didn’t want us hurting ourselves.”_

_“But that’s not fair!” Victor yelled, pulling his wrist free. “We can fight for ourselves. We know how to do it and we can help them, Yuuri. We can fight. We can–!”_

_“I know we can,” Yuuri agreed, stopping Victor mid-sentence. “I know, but father, he told us to come down here. I don’t know. We can handle ourselves and I know we can, but he just – he doesn’t believe we can, and I don’t know how to convince him otherwise. I don’t know what we can do to prove we can fight.”_

_Victor exhaled a breath, but when his mouth opened to speak, footsteps disturbed them – unfamiliar and unsuspecting, and they spun with their swords already drawn. Neither said a word. They stood closer together, taking comfort in the other’s company as a man slowly rounded the corner, his own blade drawn and standing before them._

_“Well, look at this,” the rival Captain grinned, his smile all stained teeth and mocking. “I knew Captain Katsuki had a kid, but I never realized he had a stowaway either.”_

_Yuuri’s blood ran cold, but he swallowed back the fear and gripped his blades hilt tighter._

_“What do you want?” he snapped, proud his voice came out steady._

_“Blood, obviously,” the man explained as he raised his sword higher, bigger and heavier than their own combined. “But I’d like for Captain Katsuki to hurt. He’s taken a lot away from me, so how else can I do that by killing more than just his crew, but his children, too?”_

_“He’s not my fath–!” Victor spoke, but a swinging sword came down, knocking him to the ground in his attempt to block the attack._

_There was a mighty laugh as Yuuri helped Victor to his feet, mocking them in the most sadistic way. Yuuri gave Victor a look. Neither of them were confident that this would end well, but there was nowhere to run – no place to hide – and what better way to prove their worth than to win? Yuuri knew that, and Victor did too._

_They had a better chance together than apart. Yuuri repeated that over and over as he gave Victor one last glance, and with their blades held tight, they made their first attack – together._

 

* * *

_By the time they were found, the rival Captain was dead._

_The man lay dead on the floor in his own blood, both their swords driven through his chest, a merciless end to his attempted murder. They hadn’t moved from the bedchambers. The fight left them in the worst ways, both injured but neither wishing to move as they stayed together, arms hugged around each other, ignoring the fighting and war happening around them._

_But the battle was won, and his father was proud. Blood had been spilled for the first time – by both of them – and for the second time that day, Yuuri was brutally reminded that he was still a child, only thirteen years of age. His death count had already begun._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lol so they weren't supposed to have an argument originally, but Yuuri decided he had a headache and tbh I have no control over what these boys do anymore. I don't think I ever had
> 
> to make up for being two days late last week, i'm posting two days early this week. Apparently, I have a 10 day schedule going... don't hold me to that XD
> 
> Also, at some point, I should tag this as a slow burn/build. I didn't actually anticipate the beginning to go this slowly, and long. But then again, if I went any faster, I'd feel like I'd be rushing it. 
> 
> There's a lot to write early on in this fic, and it will be a slow gradual built to the big climax, we will get some /very/ interesting things happen in between. I've tagged assassination attempt for a reason. The same goes for mystery. And anarchy! But we'll most certainly be learning more and more about Victor's forgotten past, but in due time. We've got the ball to get through ;)
> 
> Comments feed my soul, like, a lot, but a couple of you know that by now XD Hope you enjoyed it!


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> big love to izzy for listening to be complain all while writing this, and supporting me when I needed it the most <3

“Are you ready?”

Yuuri watched Victor exhale a deep breath.

“Not really,” he admitted, letting out a weak laugh. “But I don’t think we have much of a choice anymore, do we?”

Yuuri shook his head. His heart sat in his throat and his nerves tugged his chest, but he inhaled a long breath, preparing himself as he took hold of Victor. They stood chest to chest, and with their hearts beating as one, the music began – they danced.

They followed the routine Lilia taught them. They never perfected it to her liking, but they found a way to make it work. Yuuri took the lead, his reliable memory able to guide Victor in a dance he could follow, even when Yuuri wasn’t entirely certain on the steps himself – not that he’d ever admit that. He still lost his footing, and with Victor who struggled to remember at the best of times, he wasn’t overly confident that they’d pull this off.

But they did. They twirled in circles, following the crowd with little incident that it  _ surprised _ Yuuri how well it was going. He anticipated the worst. He expected mayhem, or for him to embarrass himself in front of hundreds of people, but they were pulling it off. Their façade continued, better than he ever hoped.

He’d look around every so often, eyes turned to the crowd who were smiling at them, their fond expressions encouraging Yuuri to smile too. It still didn’t feel real. They’ve never had a plan work so perfectly before, and knowing this could be their last – their final attempt at achieving their  _ dream _ – had Yuuri’s grin stretch wider.

His worth as a Captain felt fulfilled, and Yuuri would be happy to retire on such a successful plan.

“You’re smiling, darling,” Victor commented as they twirled, their feet close to stepping on one another, but Yuuri kept his footing. Barely. “Either you’re loving the attention as much as I am, or you have something in mind. Perhaps a little mischief is playing in there, hm?”

Yuuri laughed. If he could wreak havoc on this ball, he’d do it in a heartbeat. There was so much he could do; his mind had already formulated ideas that would make this event far more interesting, and he bit the edge of his smile when he got a funny idea in his head. There was plenty of gold to steal – jewels and diamonds to grab – but Yuuri would rather throw Victor over his shoulder and steal him instead.

The thought was tempting. He could do it and receive only a slap on the wrist, but the night had only just begun. They had to maintain their façade with  _ some _ form of elegance, to Yuuri’s dismay.

“Just look at everyone for a moment,” he settled with, watching Victor’s eyes turn towards the crowd. “Tell me what you see.”

“A bunch of rich, snooty people who’d chase us out of town if they knew who we really were.”

He wasn’t wrong. Yuuri would’ve laughed if it was the answer he was looking for. “Try again,” he encouraged. “Don’t look at what they are, but  _ how _ they’re looking at us. Tell me what you see.”

Victor was silent as he looked, his eyes scanning the crowd to decipher what Yuuri was suggesting. He took a moment, brows furrowed as he chewed on his bottom lip before finally settling with an answer, and as he turned, he replied, “They’re all smiling.”

“Exactly,” Yuuri grinned. “They’re looking at us, all smiling and happy. There’s not a single person out there looking at you strangely or doubting who you are. They believe you’re the prince too. They genuinely believe it. They think you’re a man of power, a  _ royal _ .”

“But I am, am I not?” Victor asked, the corners of his lips fighting a smile, his eyebrow slightly raised. “I am Victor Katsuki, after all, crowned Prince of Argyros.”

Yuuri laughed. “It has a nice ring to it, doesn’t it?”

“Perhaps,” Victor agreed. “But I think you know which I prefer.”

Yuuri smiled, shaking his head. He already knew that. Victor was a pirate at heart, and held his ranking with pride – Yuuri’s first mate until the day he died – but he worshipped their marriage in ways words could never describe. And after all, he earned it the right way, with hard work, dedication and love; Yuuri never blamed him for flaunting his success.

Whether he was a Prince, a Pirate, or just a man with a dark past, Victor was Yuuri’s husband first. And Yuuri as his – nothing came before that.

“When do you think the King will arrive?” Victor soon asked, breaking the silence with a nasty reminder – one Yuuri had forgotten until now, and he cursed his heart for shrivelling the way it did. “I know the Queen said he likes to be fashionably late, but I would have assumed he’d make more of an effort, given he’s meeting  _ me _ .”

“I don’t even know what ‘fashionably late’ means,” Yuuri admitted, lips curled into a confused scowl. It felt rude, but it must be a royal thing. “But that doesn’t matter. He’s late and it gives me time to breathe. I’m still a little nervous.”

He’d rather keep it this way. There was no King to judge them, and the Queen was already fond of them, as were the crowd with their smiles still bright as he and Victor danced to their approval. It felt peaceful. It was the calm before a potential storm. The night was going perfectly – better than Yuuri imagined, and he’d prefer it to stay that way.

“We’ll be alright,” Victor reassured him, and although it didn’t help much, Yuuri still agreed. “If everyone believes I’m the Prince, including the Queen, then he should too.”

Victor was right, but Yuuri wished he could believe him. His gut still churned with an unsettling twist. It tugged and pulled at just the  _ thought _ of the King, and his gut had never been wrong before. It always knew. It was his greatest strength yet his biggest weakness, and Yuuri exhaled a breath, ignoring his quaking heart.

“We’ll be fine,” Yuuri repeated. Perhaps he’ll believe it soon. “We’re fine.”

* * *

 

 

To say he felt drowned in a crowd made as much sense as a raindrop protesting to join the ocean, but that was exactly what it was like.

Yuuri fell out the doors with a sharp gasp, nearly tumbling to the stone floor in his haste. The panic had been rising since their danced ended, when Victor was quickly pulled away by dukes and duchesses trying to get their hands on his husband – to speak with the ‘Prince’ like he was their toy and gain his approval as if they were starved for it.

He hated it and everyone, but Yuuri despised this fear the most, and how it occurred at the most inopportune times.

He was a pirate Captain; son of Captain Katsuki, raised to be tough and fearless even when terror ate away at his heart, but never did he feel so weak when his own mind turned against him.

Victor would call him paranoid; Yuuri would say it was practical, lying through his own teeth because Victor was right. His fear of the unknown was nothing but a setback, pointless to even consider ‘practical’ because there were worse things to fear than a crowded room, and Yuuri knew that, but his rational thoughts were swayed by unreasonable ones, paranoia taking its toll like Victor said.

But Yuuri still rejected it, stubborn as always. He learned the hard way that nothing good came from a large crowd, and he stayed true to his word. There were far too many people for him to keep tabs on, and he was vulnerable without his sword, unknown to who was lurking within the group, waiting for him to be alone, his back turned, unsuspecting…

He glanced over his shoulder, tugging his sleeve. He was alone, but still his breath got caught in his chest, fear creeping up on him.

The air was sweet and the breeze cool, a perfect summer evening, but it was nothing like the ocean breeze. It was thick and muggy, too heavy for his lungs to feel satisfied but Yuuri stayed put. The outdoors meant fresh air and Yuuri would rather be here than inside where it was hotter and thicker and too small for him to breathe.

He missed the ocean. Its breeze whispered to him like a lover, placing salty kisses across his skin that would make everything just melt away. He wished to hear his crew sing, or to lie on the deck pretending to sleep, watching every little thing his husband did. The deck was his land and the seas an ever-changing view, so vast and wide; it was freedom.

The ocean was his home; nothing could change that, yet he wondered how he’d possibly survive when they retire. He wasn’t sure he could stay away from the seas for too long. It was his life, his home – raised surrounded by water. It was all he knew, and change may be scary, but Yuuri was excited.

His and Victor’s future was to be crafted by this plan – achieved upon their success. When they got their gold, they’d be gone, and it didn’t matter where they lived because in the end, home was where Victor was at. If he wished to stay here or return to the seas, live in the mountains or far inland, Yuuri would eagerly follow.

And he turned, eyes staring past the window. He always caught the soft mop of silver somewhere in the mix – his husband ever-present. He stood out like a beautiful star, radiant and bright as he laughed so handsomely; Yuuri found himself grinning. He could never turn away from Victor for too long, and knowing his husband remained safe and secure settled Yuuri’s restless heart.

If Victor weren’t pretending and Yuuri hadn’t met him when he was young, he could’ve easily mistaken him for a Prince. He ticked off the list. He was brave and smart, willing to see past his flaws and work on becoming a better human being, kinder and gentler, but rough when provoked. He fit the role so perfectly; he almost didn’t need to pretend.

But of course, Victor was still a Prince in Yuuri’s eyes; he always had been. But a  _ real _ Prince by blood?

That wasn’t Victor.

"It's quite overwhelming in there, isn't it?"

A voice spoke nearby, smooth and alluring, turning Yuuri's attention towards a man slowly walking towards him. The darkness covered his face, but Yuuri caught the faint glistening of jewels around his fingers – the most interesting part of this man by far.

“A little,” Yuuri admitted with a sigh, turning away from the busy crowd behind. Their muffled voices lifted a weight from his chest, but they were still so loud. “I’ve never had a pleasant experience with crowds. They grow so quickly. You never know who’s hiding in them.”

“I understand,” the man consoled him. His reassuring grip on Yuuri’s shoulder did nothing to help. He didn’t need his pity, or attempt at understanding him, but it was appreciated, even if it was worthless. “It’s easy to lose yourself in a crowd. You know your enemies by sight, but not by smell or touch. It’s how they can get to you, sneak up behind your back and attempt the unforgivable.”

Yuuri laughed weakly. “You seem to know an awful lot about dangerous men.”

“Of course,” the man agreed. "I've got plenty of enemies myself, but I am the King, after all.”

There was a moment – as brief as it was – where Yuuri’s heart came to a complete stop. His brain stuttered, struggling to catch up as he turned slowly, eyes and mouth frozen wide open.

He could see him now. The light from inside revealed his face, introducing Yuuri to a man dressed in silk and gold. He almost belonged, but not quite, the crown on his head defining him a man of royalty before Yuuri could take him in. He wasn’t quite what he imagined, but he was certainly a King – Yuuri didn’t need a crown to tell him that.

But everything about him was unnerving in a way Yuuri couldn’t explain. He believed the man to be kind and understanding. He  _ gave _ Yuuri that impression, but his voice was the most deceiving; soft-spoken in a way that could easily lull someone into serenity, but his face told a different tale. It left his gut churning, running his blood cold as everything inside screamed at him to run.

But Yuuri stayed put. He was no fool, but he was stubborn, and intrigue always got the better of him.

“The King?” he asked, though he knew the answer was yes. “I – I must admit, I am surprised. I expected you to be inside with everyone else.”

Yuuri exhaled a breath, careful not to let any emotions show. There’s an aura of composed danger about him that had Yuuri on edge, but his years of being a pirate Captain helped hardened his spirit and forced himself into a calm state.

“Well, as I said, it’s easy to lose yourself in a crowd,” the King said gently, almost amused. “I suspect I’m out here for the same reason as you, but enough of that. You’re the man my son decided to marry, correct?”

“I am,” Yuuri nodded, shooting the man a sideways glance; “is there a problem with that?”

The King let out a mighty laugh, like Yuuri’s caution was  _ entertaining _ to him.

“No, there’s no problem.” He chuckled, shaking his head. “I’m but a curious man. You must realize that I haven’t seen my son for so long; we assumed he was dead, so I’d like to learn what he did while he was away, and what life he had with the man he married.”

“I’m surprised the Queen never told you.”

He wasn’t surprised but rather digging for more information, to relieve his suspicion and conclude whether this man had ill-intentions like his gut told him or that Yuuri was judging him quicker than he should. He did that often, but trust was a lot to ask for; he learned that the hard way.

“Mariya told me more than I asked for,” he explained while Yuuri took a moment to remember the Queen’s name.  _ Mariya _ . He never realized. “She told me Victor returned home, alongside a husband – you. That was all I asked for. I wished to speak to Victor myself, but I hadn’t anticipated that I might not see him until the ball.”

“I think that was your fault for being, uh… fashionably late?” Yuuri told him, unsure if he used the saying correctly but when the King chuckled, he assumed it was right. “And there isn’t really much for us to tell you. We’ve been travelling since we met, moving from place to place to see the world while we can. It’s all we’ve done.”

He stared down at Yuuri with a strange sort of interest, like he was studying his words with guarded care.

Yuuri got a good look at his eyes. They were a shade of blue, not quite as bright as Victor’s but that was no comparison. They were a colour that usually reminded Yuuri of the ocean, his home, and his husband’s beautiful gaze, but they only sent a cold shiver through him.

“How did you meet him?”

Yuuri raised a brow. “I thought you wanted to speak to Victor himself about this?”

The King hesitated for a second, reluctant to speak before he finally drawleds out his words; “I suppose I did say that.”

It wasn’t like the man was fighting back. There was no war between them, no reason for Yuuri to bite the way he was, but he smirked, proud that even with a man as well spoken as the King, there were battles he could still win.

Yuuri was cautious and wildly paranoid, perhaps even a fool to suggest there was something ominous between them, but his gut continued to scream at him, his heart in his throat and lead in his chest. It had never been wrong before – so why now?

“You know, for all that I do know of his return, there’s something I can’t seem to figure out,” the King spoke, tugging Yuuri out of his detained stare to turn and look at Victor instead, still a mere silver beauty in the mix of the crowd. “He’s been away for so long… what made him return now?”

“It didn’t.” Yuuri shrugged, his lie slipping out with ease. “He lost his memory, so when someone approached us claiming he was a Prince, we didn’t really believe it.”

The King looked pleasantly surprised and almost entertained, like Victor’s amnesia was humorous to him.

His knowing smile and cold eyes didn’t sit right with Yuuri, and he knew he didn’t intend to keep his mistrust towards the King a secret. Victor might talk some sense into him, or maybe even believe him. He would help, but watching his husband walk towards them with the Queen following behind had his heart gallop in his chest, nerves fraying with each step.

“Zakhar,” Mariya spoke, placing a gentle hand on the King’s arm as Yuuri took in his name.  _ Zakhar… _ “I know you have yet to meet him, but I wanted to bring him out here first, before we announce to the rest his return.”

There was a moment of stunned intrigue from both Victor and the King. They stared at one another, seconds passing before Zakhar finally stepped forward, hands on Victor’s shoulders and looking over him like he’d never seen Victor before. He hadn’t, and Yuuri knew that, but that was part of their plan – to pretend.

And when the King laughed, chuckling deeply as he shook his head, Yuuri fought the urge to smirk.

“Vitya…” the King murmured, smiling a toothy grin when his hands cradled Victor’s face. “I almost didn’t believe Mariya when I heard you returned, but I shouldn’t have doubted her. You’re here. My son, you’re finally home.”

They were apart one moment, together the next, Victor engulfed in the man’s tight hug. When Yuuri caught Victor’s wink, he wished he could laugh it off, but there was something puzzling about the King’s gait, enough to send his hand to reach for his missing sword.

His reaction was much like the Queen's, heartfelt and honest, but Yuuri couldn’t let go of his deep-rooted paranoia. There was nothing to suggest the King was hostile. Yuuri could hardly say he was any different to Mariya, merely thankful their ‘son’ returned home, but their sweet family reunion had Yuuri on edge. His heart ached, pain tugging his gut and encouraging him to reach forward, pull Victor away and protect him from a man who had him so cautious.

But Yuuri didn’t move. He pushed his hands into his pockets, tight fists kept to himself as Zakhar moved away from Victor, turning to Mariya and hugging her too.

“We should go inside and announce him to everyone, just as we planned,” Zakhar declared, his smile seemingly genuine but Yuuri didn’t trust it. “I hope they all remember his name; Prince Victor Nikiforov, my son who’s finally home once again.”

Yuuri blinked in surprise.  _ Nikiforov?  _ He wondered, but shook his head to himself. It didn’t sound right.

“Uh,” Victor began, clearing his throat when everyone turned to look at him. “I would like to talk to my husband for just a minute. Alone, if that’s alright?”

“Of course,” Mariya nodded, and Zakhar never protested as she guided the man away, both returning to the party.

And that left Yuuri alone with Victor.

It took him a lot to not pull Victor away, return to their ship and never step foot in the castle again, but he shook those thoughts away. One man wasn’t going to change their plans. It didn’t matter how unsettled Yuuri felt around him – there were worse men to fear, and Zakhar was a  _ King _ . If he harmed anyone, Yuuri was sure it would be heard.

But then Victor began to laugh, and Yuuri raised a brow, unamused.

“What’s so funny?” he asked, wishing he could see the same humour Victor saw, but it was hard to laugh. Yuuri wished he could let things go.

“He believed me just as quickly as she did,” Victor said, a mischievous grin on his lips. “And did you hear what he called me? Prince Victor Nikiforov. It’s… so strange, but I definitely prefer Victor Katsuki better.”

“Victor Katsuki is definitely better,” Yuuri agreed, finally smiling until his heart missed a beat, an ache following, brutally reminding him of his mistrust as his smile dropped. If Victor noticed, he didn’t say anything, but Yuuri still intended to tell him.

“I don’t trust him, you know.”

“The King?” Victor asked, and as Yuuri nodded, he chewed his lip. “I don’t know. He seemed just as gullible as the Queen,  _ which _ , by the way, she never told us her name. I hope she doesn’t expect me to call her mother or something…”

“Victor you’re not…” Yuuri sighed. He was getting distracted. “I  _ really _ don’t trust him.”

“Talk me though what’s going through your mind. I’m not sure if I can understand your mistrust, but you understand it better than I do. So talk me through it.”

A soft smile curled on Yuuri’s lips as he nodded, heart yearning to tell Victor everything – and he did.

“My gut instinct has been telling me not to trust him,” Yuuri whispered, and watching Victor’s face drop had him both relieved and terrified at the same time. “I don’t know why, but something doesn’t feel right, and I can’t stop fearing the idea that he’s going to stir up some trouble.”

“Your instinct hasn’t been wrong in the past,” Victor muttered to himself, thinking. “But I don’t… I can’t see how he can be bad. He seemed genuine when he hugged me.”

“That’s what unsettles me the most, how genuine he seems,” Yuuri said, exhaling a sigh as he shook his head. “I don’t know. He seems trustworthy. He gave me that impression when I first heard him, but it was when I  _ looked _ at him, when I saw his face that everything changed.”

“Like his voice can lure you into a false sense of security?”

“Exactly.”

Victor stuttered, struggling to find something to say to Yuuri, but he didn’t need the attempt. If Victor trusted his instinct, he was relieved; if he didn’t, Yuuri would be alone in this battle, but he’d still fight to ensure Victor was safe. That meant more to him than his own life, but death wasn’t an option.

He was already thinking ahead, assuming the worst, but Yuuri couldn’t afford to be too cautious. The King was either good or bad. He just couldn’t tell which was true.

“He spoke to me first, you know,” Yuuri said, and Victor was silent as he listened. “And I remember thinking to myself ‘why is he talking to me?’ You are supposed to be his son. It would have made sense if he went to you, and then I wondered if he was almost… afraid to approach you, like he had some dark past with his son and seeing him return had him worried.”

“Perhaps he had a bad history with him?” Victor suggested. Yuuri almost wanted to be stubborn and reject the suggestion, but Victor listened to him. He should do the same. “If he seemed afraid, he might not have wanted to cause a scene in front of everyone, and instead spoke to you first to see if his son was still upset?”

“But he seemed surprised when I mentioned you lost your memory, and I don’t mean shocked but… happy, almost. It was as if that was just what he needed to hear.”

“Yuuri…” Victor sighed. “I know not to trust people who seem trustworthy. We’ve had bad experiences with that in the past…”

“Don’t make me remind you of Captain JJ.”

“No, you don’t need to,” Victor replied, shaking his head. “I do think you’re being paranoid,  _ but _ if your instinct says not to trust him, then I’ll believe your’re instinct.”

Yuuri was only slightly surprised by that, but still hearing those words fall from Victor’s lips had him exhale a relieved breath.

“Thank you,” Yuuri breathed because he didn’t know how else to express himself. “ _ Thank you. _ ”

“I’ll always listen to you, Yuuri, even if I think your logic is… somewhat swayed by paranoia, but your instinct hasn’t been wrong before,” Victor said, stroking a reassuring hand along Yuuri’s arm. And Yuuri just smiled. “Perhaps we should go back inside?”

“Don’t leave my side this time,” Yuuri said, exhaling a long breath.

“I’m not going anywhere,” Victor promised. “Not now, not ever.”

* * *

 

 

Yuuri bolted upright, gasping for a breath.

His body was bathed in a cold sweat. His heart raced, pounding in his chest as Yuuri’s trembling hand pressed to his heart, gasping desperately to fill his lungs with a satisfying relief, but it wasn’t enough. He bowed into himself, hands clutching his head and trying to breathe through the nausea swirling in his stomach.

His tears burned in his eyes but Yuuri bit back his cries. He was better than this. He had more control, power to stop this, and he repeated that over and over. He closed his eyes, inhaled sharp breaths, reassuring himself that he had full control – he was safe.

He wasn’t taken, nor bound. He wasn’t surrounded by people holding him hostage, pressing him down as a burning hot rod pressed against his wrist, burning his skin with unbearable agony and –  _ no. _

He leapt to his feet, stubbornly gritting his teeth and choking down the bile in his throat. He shouldn’t think. He shouldn’t acknowledge it because that meant remembering and Yuuri couldn’t handle thinking about it, or recalling the moment, the pain, the fear…

He paced the room. It wasn’t enough to distract his mind, but moving was a nice reminder. He flexed his fingers and wiggled his toes, gnawing on his already chewed nails until his heart settled and he could breathe without it shaking.

He couldn’t stop the trembling – not yet, but his breathing had eased and that was enough. It had to be.

He slipped on some clothes in the end, mindlessly leaving the bedroom to walk aimlessly through the hallways of the palace. It was a lot quieter than mere hours ago. The ball was once in full swing, people smiling, laughing, and Yuuri met the King for the first time, but now it was silent – peaceful. He took comfort strolling through the halls, knowing only a few guards should be awake to disturb him, if they should even catch him.

And Yuuri walked and walked until he found the library again. There was no reason to be here. He had no excuse to leave his bed and arrive here, but Yuuri still stepped inside, breathing in the dusty air that smelled of damp books and wood. There were a few missing from the bookshelves, but he’d find them laid out on Victor’s side of the bed – some read, others untouched, but still uninteresting to him.

He should really read more. Victor always told him it was good to read regularly and keep his mind learning, but Yuuri didn’t completely understand what he meant by that. He could speak fine and read well enough. He just wasn’t an intellect like Victor, and he didn’t  _ care _ about reading. Books were too long and a lot to dedicate his time to, but Yuuri still picked one up, aimlessly flicking through its pages with little care.

He didn’t care about reading it. He wasn’t going to, but then he found himself sat down, book in hand and candelabra lit, and Yuuri figured he might as well. It was a romance novel, after all, and Victor liked romance. He might learn why Victor enjoys them so much.

But after reading a few pages, Yuuri wasn’t invested. The story told a man making a declaration of love to a woman – a proposal – but she refused for a reason Yuuri didn’t understand. It wasn’t until she made the claim that marriage was a trap that he threw the book on the floor, uncaring for its contents. What did she know about love, anyway?

Nothing, since she called it a trap, but Yuuri was bitter.

“I see you didn’t care about that book then.”

And Yuuri spun, heart in his throat that quickly settled when he saw Victor standing by the doorway.

“How did you find me?” he asked, watching his husband move inside to sit on the desk beside him. “I thought you couldn’t remember your way here.”

“We’ve been here for a while now. I’m beginning to remember the way – ah… sometimes,” Victor replied with a shrug. “But I also think knowing something was wrong helped me remember. It’s not often that you leave our bed this early, and especially without telling me first. So, if you want to talk about it, I’m here.”

“You know me so well.” Yuuri laughed weakly, but Victor didn’t smile. “It was just a dream, that’s all.”

“A dream?”

“A nightmare, even,” he admitted, gulping. “A memory.”

Yuuri went stiff, fighting down the shudder when the memory of those hours clung to him. If Victor noticed, he didn’t point it out, and Yuuri was glad he didn’t. He wasn’t sure what he’d do if Victor noticed every tremble and shudder of fear he wished to hide, even from his husband.

But then Victor looked at Yuuri’s wrist. “You’ve forgotten your bandana.”

He was still shocked when he looked down at his bare wrist, eyeing the exposed and prominent ‘P’ embedded into his skin. He froze for a moment until he let out a nervous laugh, curling his fingers around his wrist to hide the mark.

“I didn’t realize,” he said, fighting down the shiver. He had been in such a rush to get out, he hardly remembered to grab it, and Yuuri cursed himself for his recklessness. He should’ve been more cautious.

Victor moved again, grabbing a chair from across the room and pulling it up beside Yuuri. He sat down and reached forward, pulling Yuuri’s hand from his wrist to lace their fingers together instead.

Yuuri almost wanted to tug away, to rip his hand from his grasp and hide the mark, but Victor wasn’t here to judge. He didn’t care, nor mind that Yuuri was scarred with something that could ruin everything. He just continued to look at Yuuri with soft, caring eyes, like that was enough to block out the terrible truth marked on his skin, and it became harder to hold back his tears.

“Nobody saw it, did they?” Victor then asked, and Yuuri shook his head.

“Nobody that mattered.”

Victor sighed with relief and it was a noise so loud in the quiet room, Yuuri felt loss of his own breath. The library always had an eeriness to it. The silence lingered, yet was forgotten when compared to the rest of the castle, and Yuuri had never been so aware of it until now. It would’ve been peaceful if he wasn’t so on edge.

“It’s been a while since you’ve…”

“Since I’ve had the memory come back, I know,” Yuuri answered for him, shaking his head to himself with disappointment. “I want to say the King was the reason it came back, but I know you’d just tell me that’s all in my mind, and I don’t think I can handle you saying that to me right now.”

“It is in your mind, Yuuri,” Victor still told him, and his heart ached at his words. “But that doesn’t mean how you feel is invalid. If  _ you _ believe the King caused it, then the King caused it. You know yourself better than anyone else, Yuuri. If you say that’s what it is, then I’ll believe that.”

Yuuri grinned, letting out a weak chuckle. “It’s pathetic,” he muttered bitterly. “A man who I spoke to for only a few moments already made me like this, so weak and brittle. I hate this. I hate it so much.”

“Yuuri, you’re not…”

“Weak, I know,” he answered again, sighing hard. “It’s hard to believe it sometimes, but I know.”

“I’m glad you do.”

The quietness returned, light and calming, and Yuuri looked at Victor with a stupid smile on his face. His pathetic dream – the memory – pulled Victor from their bed to come find him. He remembered his way to the library where he could’ve only  _ guessed _ Yuuri would be, and comforted him in ways nobody but him had ever done before. Victor was always there for him. Victor loved and cared for him, and tried his hardest to remind Yuuri everything he was, even when doubt plagued his mind.

And Yuuri knew what he wanted. He shouldn’t ask because he wasn’t in the right mind and Victor would say no, but he couldn’t help himself. He squeezed Victor’s hand tighter, inhaled a long breath and asked, “Can we make love tonight?”

“No.”

Well, he did expect that.

“Okay.” He sighed, nodding. “Okay. Another day. I should probably try to sleep anyway.”

“I think that’s best,” Victor agreed, and Yuuri nodded again when he stood up, but Victor didn’t move. Yuuri looked down at him, brow raised until he spoke again; “We’ll make love in the morning, maybe. But not now.”

“I’ll hold you to that promise.”

And Victor grinned as he stood up. “I should hope you do.

* * *

 

 

_ Sometimes, there were quiet days on the ship where nobody did anything. _

_ Yuuri liked those days. They were silent save for the laughter from other crew mates, loud and rowdy as they drink themselves silly while playing a game of Cards, but even then, the day was peaceful. It was easy to think. It allowed Yuuri’s mind to slip into thoughts he never had chance to delve into. _

_ He liked to lie out on the deck pretending to sleep. He wasn’t bothered that way. His father hardly called him over, the crew mates ignored him, and Yuuri was free to look around as he wished. He’d stare at the clouds to make shapes out of them and look at the crew with intrigue, then after a while, he’d only watch Victor. _

_ Three years had gone by so fast, and Yuuri still thought about him. _

_ It wasn’t in the way he’d been neglecting; how his eyes always turned to his chest, or his features, or those eyes that always captured him in an everlasting stare, pulled away when Victor smiled at him. No, Yuuri wondered who Victor was before all this – before he arrived on his father’s ship, an inch from death and soaked down to the bone. _

_ Yuuri had theories, assumptions, even indulging daydreams he didn’t dare tell, but with Victor who still couldn’t recall his past, there were no hints. Yuuri didn’t have a clue, but he had fun trying to piece the puzzle pieces together, even when they didn’t exist. _

_ He was healthy when he arrived. He wasn’t starved or wearing down, just injured with a mysterious wound. His father deduced he’d been hit hard by something, but what, or by who, nobody could decide. And Yuuri heard the theories from other crew mates too, their guesses what ranged from him being part of another pirate crew or just an idiot boy who got himself in trouble. _

_ Yuuri, on the other hand, believed they were all basic idiots. _

_ They didn’t look at Victor hard enough. When Yuuri watched him, he saw elegance, still, even after a few years being a pirate. Yuuri was hardly the definition of elegance himself, so looking at Victor, there were times where he wondered; when Victor moved with such grace and smiled like he’d been practicing perfecting it his whole life, if he was part of something greater. _

_ He could’ve been a dancer, for all Yuuri knew. He had the charm, the looks, even the award-winning smile that sent Yuuri’s heart ablaze, but it didn’t feel right. His gut didn’t twist with realization, or inform him that he was even on the right tracks, so Yuuri tried again. He pondered and thought, and hated when his theories were just as simple as the crew's. _

_ He must’ve been from a household rich in wealth and gold. It seemed likely, but how Victor came to the position he was in didn’t add up to his assumed upbringing. But still, Yuuri hoped it was true. He liked to imagine Victor being raised around wealth and education and a life that didn’t require him to murder. _

_ Yuuri’s blood ran cold, fighting down the frightful shiver. He didn’t like to think about it. _

_ He sat up with a sigh, turning to Victor who was watching the ocean. The breeze howled a low whistle, tousling Victor’s long silver hair, and for just a moment, Yuuri wondered if his childhood theory that Victor was a siren was true. He was beautiful, alluring in every way, and even a theory as far-fetched as that had him ponder. _

_ “Hey, Victor?” Yuuri called, beckoning him over before he could even stop himself. _

_ But Victor walked over, and Yuuri’s heart raced when he smiled. “Is everything alright?” _

_ “Yeah, yeah,” Yuuri said, frantically nodding because now he had Victor here, he didn’t know what it was he actually wished to say. His cheeks burned with embarrassment, and with the way Victor’s blue eyes peered at him curiously, Yuuri caved. _

_ “I don’t suppose you called me over here to say nothing?” _

_ His voice was soft, humour behind the faint laugh he exhaled. Yuuri wished he could’ve laughed along, but he gulped harshly, fingers playing with the hem of his shirt to distract himself from his own embarrassment. _

_ “I was thinking…” he began, pausing for a moment to collect his words. “I wasn’t sure if I should ask this, but I might as well. Have you never thought of who you were before this?” _

_ When Victor laughed, Yuuri was taken back, but no more than when Victor asked, “Why should I?” _

_ “Huh?” _

_ He then moved to sit beside Yuuri, closer than he would’ve deemed comfortable – legs pressed against each other’s, and Yuuri could’ve sworn their fingers grazed, but he didn’t complain. Victor did this often, and although his heart could barely handle it, Yuuri quite enjoyed being this close. _

_ “To answer your question, yes, I have thought of who I was before this, and no, I can’t remember who I was,” Victor answered with a grin, a little too happy in Yuuri’s opinion. “But I stopped trying to guess long ago. I don’t think I’ll ever remember who I was, but that’s okay, because as who I am now, I have you in my life.” _

_ “You can’t just say things like that.” Yuuri laughed, his cheeks burning a rosy pink. “But… aren’t you at all curious, or concerned? You didn’t arrive in the greatest way. I’d be worried that somebody was, and still is, out for me if that happened to me.” _

_ “No, I know I’m safe here.,” Victor smiled. “And besides, whoever I once was, I can’t really miss it if I don’t remember it. As far as I know, this is my life, and that’s fine. I like it here, even if Captain Katsuki still doesn’t call me by my name, but you’re here, so that makes it worthwhile.” _

_ “Stop saying that.,” Yuuri laughed, lightly smacking Victor’s arm in response, but he knew he wouldn’t and Yuuri was perfectly fine with that. “I’m just the Captain’s son, you know.” _

_ “And one day, you’ll be my Captain. We’ll sail these seas together, far and wide, and who knows what trouble we’ll cause. See, that’s why I’m not curious about my past, because what else could be as exciting as this?” _

_ “I suppose you’re right,” Yuuri eventually agreed with a sigh. It wasn’t the answer he’d been hoping to hear, but it was better. So, so much better. “Let’s make a promise. It doesn’t matter what happens or who gets in our way, we’ll be together for years to come.” _

_ “Together,” Victor agreed, linking his pinkie finger with Yuuri’s. “You know, I’m quite looking forward to our future.” _

_ And in Yuuri’s excited triumph, he smirked. _

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've had one hell of a war with this chapter, and at times, the fic itself. But I keep coming back to it because no matter what I do, I can't stop myself from writing it. It's been the most enjoyable fic I've written to date, and although my anxiety can push me down at times, sometimes so much that it's tempting to just give up completely, I keep coming back to it, and that must mean something.
> 
> But I don't feel like talking about that; I've expressed myself enough this week.
> 
> I do sincerely hope you've enjoyed this chapter, and/or this fic in general. We're only beginning to get into the build of the plot, and we've still got so much more to discover, and new characters to meet! When I say I have a lot planned for this fic, I have a lot, and I hope to take everyone on an enjoyable ride that I'm having so much fun with.
> 
> Kudos and comments are forever appreciated. I've been thinking about trying to post every Sunday, but I know that's a tight schedule that doesn't give me or my beta the chance to take it easy, but who knows :)


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Big love to izzy <3 <3 Thank you for dealing with my repetitive grammar mistakes XD
> 
> This chapter accidentally became a monster, and would you believe how much I struggled with it? XD

There was a lot Yuri would do for a breath of fresh air.

He considered escaping a few times. There were ways and the thought held appeal, but he knew even if he did that it was pointless. He was trapped on a ship with pirates. Even if he somehow evaded them all, there was nowhere else to go besides the ocean’s merciless depth, and Yuri wasn’t ready to die just yet.

He still had pride. It may be tattered and worn, but it was still there, stubborn as always.

Yuri worried it wouldn’t last. Most of his days were spent in a cell, left to rot like the dirty pirates that surrounded him, and even that would drive the strongest wills crazy. He tried to last. He forced himself silent and refused to ask for freedom, but after a month of feeling insanity creep into the edge of his mind, Yuri was running out of options.

But god, did he hate these pirates. They laughed and mocked him, and Yuri often daydreamed about finding a sword and having his way with that pirate Captain’s crew, or grabbing the quartermaster by the throat and demanding his freedom. It was a nice thought to doze off to, but it never lasted before another pirate was there, reminding Yuri every reason why he despised these pigs.

He hated them all, but the greatest humiliation were the times Yuri found himself  _ wanting _ the quartermaster to be in the room. He was fine, sometimes, and nice when he had the mind to be. There was a strange sort of understanding behind his cold eyes, and Yuri almost wanted to talk to him more. He feared the day he might forget he was supposed to hate this man, but for now, Yuri would take what he could get.

But what he could get wasn’t a lot, and it wasn’t too long before he began to feel desperate.

“I want to go out.”

Nothing had changed to his routine. The quartermaster still served him a dish of cold food at the same time every evening, and he was still trapped in his small cell, insanity slowly easing its way into his mind. Nothing persuaded him to assume he’d get what he wanted; Yuri just found the voice to ask.

And the strange look he received from the quartermaster almost had him regret his words – almost.

“That’s nice,” he said, placing the food on the ground and sliding it beneath the cell bars. “But you should know by now that I can’t do that. I can’t risk losing you because I was so kind to let you out for a few minutes.”

“You let me out to use the bathroom. It won’t be any different. There’s nowhere I can go, anyway,” Yuri argued, ignoring his food as he stormed to his feet, stubbornly gritting his teeth as his vision blurred and he swayed. He needed better food – and air. He needed fresh air.

“You can go overboard,” the quartermaster replied. “I don’t think you’d do that, but I still can’t let you out. My Captain never let prisoners out before; I can’t be seen going against his own rules.”

Yuri groaned, pressing his forehead against the cold bars. It became harder to ignore his own desperation. He tried to hide it. He told himself to get it together, to not appear so weak in front of the pirate scum, but something inside Yuri was snapping – a frantic need to yell and scream and cry for freedom, even temporarily.

“You seem desperate.”

“I am desperate!” he yelled, his soul cracking under the pressure. “I don’t know what’s happening to the Kingdom and I don’t know what your pirate Captain is doing to everything I’ve tried to maintain. This room stinks of piss and death, and if I stay in here for another day, I might go insane, and I can’t go crazy. I have too much to return to.”

The quartermaster was silent. He stared at Yuri, hand curled around his swords hilt as he cocked his head to one side. He raised a brow, questioning Yuri’s reaction, but he didn’t reply. He said nothing, and there was a need again – another desire to exclaim his anguish and beg, but Yuri held his tongue.

“Tell me, what does a royal have to return to?” he asked, and Yuri wanted to scream. “Is it the expensive clothes and clean beds? Is it that you can do whatever you like without consequence because you see yourself as superior, looking down at people like myself?”

Yuri wasn’t entirely sure what to say, but not because he didn’t know how to reply. The response baffled him. He needed a moment to find his words.

“I don’t know  _ how _ you came to that conclusion, but you’re an idiot,” he spat, completely taken back by his idiocy. He expected better. “I don’t think you quite realise my responsibility back at the palace, do you?”

“I don’t, no. And I don’t care either.”

And the quartermaster turned to leave. Yuri would’ve let him if he wasn’t so desperate. The company was needed – even if he hated himself for thinking so – and he was the only tolerable pirate on the ship. He may see Yuri as some rich kid with no struggles, but he listened, sometimes. He had to take what he could get.

“You will when I tell you it can ruin your Captain’s plans!” he called out, and that stopped the pirate.

The quartermaster turned, slowly, stalking back towards Yuri with a wary glare in his eyes. There was doubt too. Yuri didn’t blame him, but that kept the pirate here. If he could keep him talking for just a little longer, until Yuri’s mind eased and the insanity grew distant, he’d feel satisfied. He believed he could last another day or so in this cell – he hoped.

“This has something to do with your responsibility?”

“It does,” Yuri nodded, wishing he thought this through a little longer – but he was desperate, still. “My father was Prince Yakov, brother of King Zakhar. When Victor went missing, my father was heir to the throne, until he died a year ago: poisoned, which put that responsibility onto me. Do you know what that means?”

The quartermaster’s brows dropped, crossing his arms in wary interest. “What does you being the next King have to do with my Captain’s plan?”

Yuri almost wanted to laugh. What a stupid, ignorant pirate, but he almost couldn’t blame him. He’d never been open about his past to any of these pigs – not until now, and Yuri’s words taste like ash.

“It means I’m easier to remember,” he stated loudly. “I’m only supposed to be away for a few months at most. Even if the King and Queen forget I’m supposed to return soon, Otabek will remind them. He won’t let me perish with the likes of scum like you.”

The quartermaster smirked. “They should be back by then.”

“And if they’re not?”

His silence was telling, as was the drop of his grin. Yuri couldn’t help but let his own show.

“They’re walking into something they don’t understand,” he spoke, grinning wickedly. “If Victor ever remembers, he’ll know exactly why, but I don’t think he will and that will be their greatest downfall.”

“Is my Captain in danger?”

“They’re in danger no matter what,” Yuri replied. “Their plan is bold, but your Captain risks being caught, and the King isn’t so forgiving when he sends someone to their death. And Victor’s return will surely spark something; if not from his enemies, then from whoever made him forget everything in the first place. It’s like I said: they’re walking into something they don’t understand.”

Yuri was grinning until the quartermaster stepped closer, and something inside him cowered away, but he stubbornly stayed put. He didn’t know what to expect. A quick punch seemed likely, but the man didn’t speak. He only stared with those cold, unreadable eyes.

And when he raised his arm, Yuri flinched as it landed on his shoulder, but his grip wasn’t tight. He squeezed, but not as a threat. He held him there, keeping Yuri faced with his uncertain gaze as he smiled weakly.

“Thank you.”

Yuri blinked. “What?”

“For telling me this; thank you,” he said, and moved his hand away to reach into his pocket. Yuri didn’t know what was happening; even as the quartermaster pulled a chain of keys from his pocket, he didn’t ask.

And when the cell doors swung open, he stood frozen.

“W-what are you doing?”

“I’m letting you out,” the man replied, stepping aside to allow him free. “It won’t be forever. It’s just to show you my appreciation for what you’ve told me. It’s viable information, and I must admit… perhaps you royals don’t have it so easy after all.”

And Yuri blinked again, unsure if this was real or if his mind had finally collapsed, but it felt real. He stepped forward and no invisible wall pushed him back. He moved past the cell door, open and free and able to move where he pleased for the first time in a long while, and even the quartermaster’s grip on his swords hilt didn’t ruin his mood.

“Only for a while. I’ll be keeping my eye on you so don’t think to abuse this,” the quartermaster warned, and Yuri nodded, undoubting and willing to cooperate.

“Thank you,” he said in return, and the quartermaster never replied. He merely motioned ahead of him, allowing Yuri the freedom he’d been so desperate for.

A little while would be enough. That was all he needed – just a little while to breathe fresh air.

 

* * *

There was something oddly familiar about the castle.

Victor had been thinking about it since they arrived. The hallways seemed to stir something in his mind, or a new room would spark familiarity, like he’d been here before years ago, but no matter how hard he tried to remember, there were no memories of this place.

It was like walking through a dream. He knew it so well, but the moment he’d open his eyes, Victor would forget, and that was the most frustrating part.

He once tried hard not to care, or understand the strange feeling twisting his gut. He had no memories of this place. There were no lost thoughts to resurrect a forgotten past, or memories flashing through his mind when he’d see a certain room that appeared familiar. This place was as new to him as it was to Yuuri, unknown and strange, large compared to their ship, but there were days where Victor couldn’t help but look around and wonder – where he’d look at these walls and feel like he’s where he should be.

He hadn’t been sure why it was like this. He felt strange arriving in the Kingdom, constantly asking Yuuri if they’d been here before, but he always rejected the suggestion. Victor believed him, for a while, but the feeling came back. It magnified after the ball – after he met the King who Yuuri hated with a passion.

Victor didn’t hate the man himself. There were few alarm bells, but whether that was from a reason or not, he didn’t know; and unlike Yuuri, Victor wasn’t so quick to judge.

Those feelings came back; the same that plagued him with familiarity and recognition that  _ should _ remind him of something. There was a thought there. He could feel it, a memory hidden deep within his mind but there was nothing to remember. Where he believed he should recall something, there was nothing there, and Victor didn’t know what to do anymore.

And for the first time in a long while, he began to wonder who he was before his amnesia.

He pondered the lives he might’ve lived, and the people he could’ve known, but nothing called out to him. Even assuming he  _ was _ the missing Prince of Argyros didn’t change anything, but it stuck with him longer than he would’ve liked. It clung to his brain, forever present, and it soon became the only thing Victor could think about.

He decided, somewhere during his exhausted thinking, that he should look for evidence. It was a journey he took alone, blindly searching through the castle to find a single piece of the Prince’s past and learn the history of the man he was pretending to be. And soon, Victor found it.

He didn’t find a journal, nor the Prince's old bedroom. He found a family portrait hidden within the depths of the castle, and sat in the centre of the painting was a young boy – Victor himself.

He almost didn’t believe it. He tried hard not to, but Victor couldn’t turn away. There was a portrait of a child who looked stupidly similar to himself that soon, he didn’t understand why he was rejecting the truth. He wasn’t a fool. He knew when something wasn’t a coincidence, and everything about the Prince stopped being so long ago.

He was Victor Katsuki, pirate to his husband Captain Yuuri Katsuki. He’d know that his whole life, but the truth was he was also Prince Victor Nikiforov, crowned prince of Argyros, and he wasn’t sure how to process that. 

He felt so stupid for only realizing this now. The clues were always there. Even his own mind had been trying to tell him in the only way it knew how; those feelings, the occasional word that echoed a voice in his mind, still unknown to its owner but a reminder of a past that happened somewhere in this castle. He should have known sooner. He was smarter than this, but instead he laughed in its face like the pirate he was, blinded by ignorance and greed.

He should tell Yuuri. His husband deserved to know, but he knew how Yuuri could get and it all came down to timing. Yuuri was an overthinker. He worried and panicked, and knowing how he felt towards the King, Victor didn’t intend to add to his paranoia. He would tell Yuuri eventually. He never kept a secret from him, but the guilt was eating him alive and he wasn’t sure how long he could last.

He wasn’t sure why he felt compelled to tell Yuuri over dinner. There was nothing about the day that felt different, but he kept his lips sealed, guilt slowly driving him insane until they were lying in bed, Yuuri asleep next to him that he nearly shook his husband awake just to tell him the truth.

But he didn’t, and there was a moment where he just stopped – just lay there next to Yuuri and really looked at him.

The gentle rise and fall of his chest nearly lulled Victor to sleep, but his mind was too restless. His eyes stayed closed, deep in sleep and his world at ease. He looked so soft and warm and comfortable compared to the hardened pirate Captain he was expected to be, and Victor took pride knowing he was the only one to ever see this. He’d seen Yuuri at his best, his worst, and during those quiet moments neither dared show their crew.

His heart pulled suddenly, tugging in all directions. It was a huge secret he was keeping from him. Victor should tell Yuuri; he should say something, but telling him might not be any better. He couldn’t pile more on him. He had enough with his deathly fear of the King, but Victor couldn’t stay silent. He couldn’t keep something like this from him. He’d be a terrible husband.

But Yuuri was asleep, and Victor had a thought. If he whispered it to him, that would technically be telling him. It would relieve some of the guilt, he hoped, and he could always prepare to tell him again when he was ready. At this point, he’d take what he could get.

Then Victor leaned closer. He swallowed thickly, breath held as he prepared to spill the truth and whispered, “I haven’t told you this, but I found out I’m the Prince.”

He expected very few things to happen. The rational part of his brain told him Yuuri wouldn’t react, but when his husband turned slowly, very much awake and eyes staring at Victor with a single blink, his heart leapt from his chest.

“You… what?”

“Yuuri!” Victor gasped, quickly sitting upright. “I thought you were asleep!”

“I was,” he replied, shifting to lie on his back and face Victor. “But then you hit me with that, and I think sleeping is the last thing on my mind right now, so would you care to explain what you mean by that?”

Victor laughed nervously. He imagined easing Yuuri into it, admitting the truth in his own time and gradually building Yuuri up to the discovery, but his husband surprised him. He hadn’t been asleep like he assumed, but awake and listened to every word – every  _ truth _ Victor spilled, and he stuttered over his words, unable to fully comprehend and explain himself.

“I must admit,” he began, “I didn’t expect you to be awake. I – uh, I hadn’t anticipated you’d be awake, actually. I’m sure you’ve got a lot of questions.”

“I have many, yes,” he replied, oddly calm. “Perhaps we should begin with the basic: what do you  _ mean _ you’re the Prince?”

Victor took a deep breath. It was now or never.

“It means I’m the Prince. I mean the  _ real _ Prince, the one who went missing. That’s – that’s me. It’s who I was before my amnesia, Prince Victor Nikiforov, and these royals are my family.”

And Yuuri gave him that look again, the same one that made him doubt himself, but even his questionable gaze didn’t sway Victor from his discovery. He knew who he was. His realization had too much evidence to be disregarded, and he would happily explain it to Yuuri if he didn’t believe Victor’s words.

By the look on his face, he might have to, but he hoped Yuuri could at least give him the benefit of the doubt.

“You mean to tell me you believe you’re the Prince…?” Yuuri began, speaking slow.

“I don’t believe; I know.”

“Victor…” Yuuri sighed, moving to sit up. “I don’t want you to think I doubt you, but I just… I can’t see it. I suppose it’s not impossible. You were found out at sea, you could be anyone’s son, but it just seems… unbelievable.”

“And I could also be theirs,” Victor said firmly. “And I am. I know I am.”

He could accept if Yuuri didn’t believe him. He suspected so, but Yuuri doubting his words – distrustful of his evidence and gut feeling when Victor was always so open to believe Yuuri’s would break his heart.

“They’re not your parents, Victor.”

And Victor wished his heart didn’t ache the way it did, but Yuuri had yet to hear him out. He wasn’t ready to give up just yet.

“You don’t know that,” Victor replied and ignored the way Yuuri sighed. “But I know what’s true. I’ve seen it. I remember, vaguely, I think. It’s not memories, but I hear a voice sometimes. I hear it when they call me Vitya. I recognise this place from my past, but I can’t see it in my head or remember when I was last here. My brain has been telling me something, like your gut feeling, and I’m done trying to ignore it, Yuuri.”

Yuuri was silent and all Victor anticipated was his response – his words that would finally say he believed Victor, and he would support him, but Yuuri looked down and chewed his lip. He shook his head, denying Victor’s attempt to explain himself, and he almost wished to shake his shoulders and scream at him to face the truth – to stop being a selfish, ignorant pirate for once.

“Victor, I can’t…” Yuuri stopped, exhaling a sigh. “It seems so… wrong. Are you sure you’re not mistaking those feelings?”

“Yuuri, I – It explains the voices. It explains why I found a family portrait of us with  _ me _ in the picture. Yuuri, I know I don’t remember much, but I know how I looked as a kid, and I’ve never seen another child with long silver hair like mine was.”

Yuuri didn’t blink for a minute – at least.

“A painting of you?” he asked, and Victor didn’t hesitate to nod. “Are you sure?”

“I’m positive,” he replied. “There’s been far too many coincidences for me to say otherwise, and I hoped even you can’t deny them by now.”

Yuuri didn’t reply, but Victor didn’t need him to. It was finally getting through to him. He thought hard about it, brows hung low as he took in the information that had even Victor take a while to process. It was a lot. He could understand that, but whether Yuuri would accept or deny his realization would determine what happened next.

If he said he believed him, Victor might not be able to stop himself from kissing him. But if Yuuri denied it, again, he’d drag his husband by the ear until he remembered the way to that room hidden deep within the castle, show Yuuri the painting and prove one and for all that he was the missing Prince of Argyros.

“You seem strangely calm about all this,” Yuuri began, and Victor raised a brow, unsure if this was him believing Victor or not. “How long have you known?”

His breath caught in his throat, but he swallowed thickly. Yuuri deserved to know the truth.

“Since before the ball.”

“The ball?” Yuuri asked, lips slowly forming into an angry scowl, and while everything inside Victor told him to lie, he couldn’t, so he nodded his head. “You mean to tell me you’ve known for that long and you never told me?”

“I was going to tell you!” Victor scrambled, quick to try to explain himself before it got worse. “That night, at the ball. I planned to tell you after you met the King, but you told me how you felt towards him and I didn’t want to add to that. I – I was afraid if I told you, you might –”

“Victor, you don’t get to make that decision for me,” Yuuri stated firmly. “And since when did we keep secrets from each other?”

“No, I know,” he nodded, swallowing thickly. “I know. That’s why I’m telling you now.”

“Well, spill.”

And Victor did.

He told Yuuri what he could remember. He explained it in further detail, telling everything from his thoughts and feelings to the voice in his head – the lost memories – and trying to help Yuuri understand. He didn’t fully understand it himself. He struggled, sometimes, but he spoke until his mouth was dry. He kept talking until he couldn’t remember what else he needed to say, and finalized it all with a heavy, exhausted breath.

Yuuri was staring at him, but he had been since the moment Victor started to speak. There was a questionable look in his eyes, like processing his words were too much for his brain to handle, but Victor knew Yuuri was just thinking about it. He was taking it all in, trying, and possibly failing, to come to his own conclusion.

“I’ll be honest, Victor,” Yuuri began as he laughed nervously, scratching his neck. “I don’t really know what to say.”

“Well, do you believe me?”

Yuuri’s silence was telling, and Victor felt he didn’t need him to explain himself when he said, “I think it’s best I don’t answer that just yet.”

“I know it’s a lot to believe, but I feel it so  _ strongly _ . I’m confident about it. It’s the same way I know how I love you; that’s how much I believe it, Yuuri. That’s how  _ real _ this feels, and all I ask of you is your support.”

“Victor,” Yuuri sighed, and reached forward to link their fingers together; his tight grip sending soft flutters through Victor’s chest. “I made a vow to you when we got married. Do you remember what I told you?”

“I do.”

“Then you know I’m with you every step of the way,” Yuuri grinned tenderly, releasing a hand to cup Victor’s cheek. “It’s you before anyone else. It’s you before my ship, my crew, my wealth – even my own life. It’s you. I may not understand, and I may not believe it, but you will always have my full support.”

Victor wished that was enough. He hoped, somewhere in his heart, that Yuuri would believe him – that Yuuri wouldn’t need evidence but Victor’s own words to believe what he told, but his support would have to do. He’d rather have that than just doubt, and Victor felt so lucky to have a husband as supportive as Yuuri.

“I’ll find that painting and I’ll show it to you,” Victor declared. “It might help you understand, but for now, your support will be enough.”

When Yuuri kissed him, it was hard not to delve into it, to deepen it with his hands on Yuuri’s body and the desirable taste of his tongue, but he held back for the sake of conversation. There was still so much to say. Victor might not have the energy to talk anymore, but he and Yuuri had a lot to talk through.

And as if Yuuri read his mind, he spoke between gentle kisses, “I think we should leave conversations for the morning.”

“You think?” Victor asked, pulling back to meet his gaze.

“I was asleep before you woke me up, if you remember?” he asked, grinning, and Victor chuckled. “We’ll sleep on it and talk in the morning.”

“You promise you’ll still support me in the morning?”

He didn’t doubt, but Yuuri’s nod eased that small thought which questioned otherwise.

“I promise.”

* * *

 

 

Yuuri stayed true to his word. He still didn’t believe it, but he supported Victor in the morning, like he promised.

And in the morning, Victor realized he wasn’t completely pleased about it. He wished Yuuri believed him. He had  _ hoped _ Yuuri would, but they didn’t always agree on things and that was okay, as long as the support was there – which it was.

They talked more that next morning, and again throughout the day, and the days following that. They discussed it during moments where the were alone without interruption, speaking of their plan in a silent whisper and the discovery that Yuuri didn’t believe, but Victor did. He was happy they were talking about it. The more Victor got off his chest, the better he felt, but still he wished he could remember where that room was and show Yuuri the painting that answered all his questions.

But Victor knew, unless something triggered the memory, he wouldn’t remember, and waiting was becoming insufferable. His best chance was asking the King or Queen, but finding time to talk to them was proving harder than expected.

Mariya said she was around often, but Victor never saw her. Zakhar was somewhere in the castle, doing whatever it was a King did with his day, and Victor was at a loss. He just needed a moment, a  _ second _ of their time to twist a conversation his own way, ask if there are any paintings of him as a child and eventually, show Yuuri his proof.

It had to wait regardless. Victor needed a moment with her, ask where it was in the castle, and write on a piece of parchment the directions. He should remember that way. He could prove to Yuuri, once and for all, that he was Prince Victor Nikiforov – for certain.

He did find her eventually. He hadn’t intended on it; he decided to take a morning walk after a frightful dream he couldn’t remember when he found her in the gardens. She sat in front of a canvas, paintbrush in hand and unaware of Victor’s silent presence behind her.

“I didn’t know you painted.”

Mariya spun, gasping and wild-eyed until she realized it was Victor behind her and not some stranger. She let out a breath and put her paintbrushes aside, smiling at Victor as she gestured for him to come over.

“I don’t paint as often as I used to,” she explained as Victor sat on a spare stool beside her. “It’s a skill I’ve always had. I used to paint when I was a child, mostly for fun, but I’m often too busy to indulge in a hobby like this anymore. If I’m awake early enough, I try to find time.”

Victor hummed as he nodded, and allowed a silence to fall between them. He wasn’t quite sure how he would ask, but he didn’t need to bring it up just yet. He’d rather enjoy himself watching her paint for a while. It was relaxing. The colourful mess on the canvas soon became a clearer picture, and Victor finally identified it to be a flower – simple but beautiful, splashes of colour bringing the painting to life.

“I like to read when I have time,” Victor found himself saying, mindlessly and random. Mariya paused to look at him. “I like romance novels.”

She smiled fondly. “A romantic at heart?”

“Yuuri likes to say so.” He shrugged, grinning. “I know some people read them to escape their own lives, but I don’t need to do that. It reminds me of myself and Yuuri. There’s been so much conflict in our lives, but we’ve gotten through it together, and knowing I can also read that in writing makes it all worthwhile.”

“That’s very sweet, Victor.”

He couldn’t meet her stare. He told Yuuri this before, admitting his love for romance novels, but Yuuri never understood it; and yet here he was, telling something he only ever told his husband to a woman he hardly knew – a Queen, no less – but still his mother by blood, and Victor finally met her eyes.

She smiled when she took his hand, and Victor stayed silent as she looked over the gold ring on his finger. He did the same to hers. It didn’t stand out like his own, its shine having faded with age, and he wondered why she didn’t clean it for so long as she released his hand.

“You and your husband are very happy together, aren’t you?”

And Victor smiled brightly, nodding.

“He’s the love of my life,” he admitted blatantly, but Victor saw no shame in love. “He’s… a lot, but in good ways. He’s bold and cunning, mischievous and funny when he has the mind to be. And he’s beautiful too. I honestly don’t know where I’d be without him, or if I’d even be  _ alive _ if it wasn’t for Yuuri.”

“Love is a powerful thing,” she mused with a smile on her lips. “It can bring people up or tear them down. I’m almost glad you were able to choose your own life, and marry the person you fell in love with.”

Victor’s smile suddenly dropped.

“You didn’t get to choose?” he asked, heart tearing in all directions as Mariya shook her head. He didn’t dare think of what it would be like, to love someone you can’t marry, and Victor shook his head to himself, clearing those awful thoughts from his mind.

“It’s not all bad, Vitya,” she tried to reassure, but Victor didn’t want to hear it. “I still live a good life here.”

“Do you love the King?”

“Well, I’m inclined to,” she answered. Victor didn’t know what to say. “It’s just how it is, Vitya. I knew this when I was young and so did you. Your father was very keen on marrying you off to a princess, and live in another Kingdom, but I’m pleased to see you married who you wished. He may not be royal blood, but you’re happy, and that makes me incredibly happy.”

Suddenly, Victor didn’t appear so interested in his search for the painting anymore. He could ask about it later, but there was another chance here, an opportunity to ask about the King and dig for more information.

“I’m happy too,” he agreed, and inhaled a deep breath. “Forgive me if I’m asking for too much, but are you happy with the King?”

“I’m content with him,” she replied strangely quick. Victor almost didn’t have time to process it before she continued; “It’s not love. It’s never been love, but we both know that. I’m happy with the life I have here. I’m healthy. I have wealth and food and a home, and I have my son back. What more could I ask for?”

Victor wasn’t sure how to reply. It didn’t explain more about the King, but he couldn’t stop fixating on their lack of love. He couldn’t understand how that was a good life, to be married to someone you didn’t love. Her ring was meaningless, where Victor’s meant the world to him – more than he could describe to a woman who had possibly never known love before.

It was baffling, and Victor stuttered over his words as he said, “To not love the man you’re married to… I don’t know how you can say you’re content with that?”

“As I said, I have my son back.”

Victor’s chest churned and pulled, and there was a sudden need to cry. He wanted to sob and hug her and feel her warm motherly embrace, something he’s never experienced his entire life, but Victor was stronger than that. She may be his mother, but he was still stealing from her. He couldn’t grow attached now.

“He’s not a bad man, Vitya,” she said, pulling Victor from his thoughts. “He’s… certainly a character, I must admit. He can have his moments where he loses sense of himself, and he’s made some decisions I disagree heavily on, as does the Kingdom, but being a King isn’t easy. He’s had to make sacrifices. He’s lost more than you can imagine, Vitya.”

“If he’s not bad, what is he then?”

“He’s scarred, Vitya,” she answered with a sigh. “His Kingdom tried to overthrow him, and they would have nearly succeeded if it wasn’t for your disappearance that plagued this place in grief. He lost his brother a year ago too; poisoned. It’s not been an easy life for him – for us, together, but he isn’t a bad man.”

Victor wasn’t sure if he could believe her. Her view may be faded, swayed by the ring on her finger and life he’s given her, but all Victor could do was exhale a breath and nod. Yuuri may be right in his mistrustful feeling, and they may be walking themselves into a trap, but backing out was no longer an option.

“He’s lost a lot, it seems.”

“More than you can imagine,” Mariya replied, and if Victor could, he would’ve put that to the test. He and Yuuri lost more – he could guarantee it, but not now. “He’s not been the same for a long time, so forgive him if he comes across as rather… unnerving. There’s been a lot of talk about him, and he’s losing grip of the Kingdom again, but he’ll pull through. He always does.”

Victor went to reply but his tongue got caught in his throat, trapping his voice and nearly choking him when he caught the alarmed stare from his husband peering around a bush. In his grasp was a handful of expensive vases. By the look in his eyes – the manic, wide-eyed state – he needed a distraction, and possibly a loud one too.

“Vitya, are you alright?” Mariya asked, turning her gaze to look behind her. Victor scrambled to keep her eyes forward that in his haste, he knocked over her paints, spilling colours and oils onto the ground.

“Ah! M-my bad!” he declared loudly, laughing nervously as he scratched his neck. He waved a hand behind his back, motioning at Yuuri to move while the Queen was occupied staring at the mess around her. “I’ll – I’ll help clean this up.”

“It’s no bother, really,” she smiled, picking up a few brushes and putting them aside; “I can get someone to clean this up. A Prince shouldn’t get down on his knees and get all dirty.”

There was a mild thought there, one Victor aggressively ignored as he watched her move to look for someone to clean. He glanced behind him, catching a quick glimpse of Yuuri as he rushed past them, soon gone from his sight, and Victor exhaled a relieved breath. His husband was… something else, truly.

“Vitya?” Her voice startled him. “Are you alright?”

“U-uh, yeah. Yeah, I’m fine,” he replied, disappointed for allowing his voice to quiver. He cleared his throat. “Uh, hey, I actually was wondering – watching you painting and all, but why are there no paintings of me in the castle?”

If he was disappointed before, he was proud now, glad he could come up with a way to distract her so quickly.

“Oh, Zakhar put them away,” she replied with a polite smile. “Said it was too upsetting to have them up. I don’t understand why, but I suppose we all grieve differently.”

He didn’t know what to think about that.

“Can you perhaps show me one,” he asked, before adding, “far inside the castle? Somewhere away from here?”

_ God damn it, Victor. Get it together! _

“I can, yes.”

Victor inhaled another breath, running a hand through his hair. He was such a mess, but the Queen didn’t see through his panic. If she had, she never mentioned it, rather agreeing with Victor’s request and moving onwards, guiding him to the piece of evidence he wished to show Yuuri.

It was one step at a time – Victor proving to Yuuri who he was, and Yuuri, clearly, beginning to move things for them to sell. Yuuri may have been reckless, but so was he, in a way, and he decided not to mention it to him later in the evening.

He  _ may _ mention being a Prince on his knees, but that was a thought for later. Right now, he followed the Queen, a piece of parchment in his hands as he wrote down the directions.

As he said, one step at a time.

* * *

 

 

_ Yuuri always liked quiet days, but he had a particular fondness for days where the crew were away, where it was just him and Victor on the ship. Alone. _

_ He was never sure what they did on land. His father rarely ever told him, only ever saying he had “business,” as if that was enough for Yuuri to understand, but he long stopped asking his father questions. If he intended to tell Yuuri, he would say. If he didn’t, Yuuri wouldn’t ask. He didn’t wish to waste his time on his father anymore. _

_ He’d rather be with Victor, if he was brutally honest. He’d rather spend his days with Victor, sit beside him and talk mindlessly about anything and everything. He liked Victor. A lot. He could sit with him for hours, even in silence, and never get bored of just being in his presence. Victor was a special kind of person to Yuuri; one he wished to cherish, to love and protect and treasure for a long, long time. _

_ He always hoped Victor thought the same of him. He was never sure, but Yuuri often doubted the genuine kindness from others. He blamed his father, mostly, for embedding the idea that he should never trust anyone, not even the crew. _

_ But Yuuri trusted Victor, because screw what his father said. What did he know? _

_ “When do you think they’ll be back?” Victor asked late that night; the only sound heard were the gentle ocean waves, and the light creaking of footsteps as Yuuri moved forward. “They’re usually quite late, but I don’t think they’ve ever been this late?” _

_ “They’re probably on their way soon,” Yuuri replied, waving his hand. “I don’t care, honestly. I like it when it’s quiet.” _

_ “I know you do.” Victor grinned. _

_ A silence followed and Victor moved aside, sitting down instead. He brushed his hair back, quickly plaiting it into a messy braid and Yuuri almost told him not to. He loved watching his hair move with the breeze, his locks gently flowing and leaving Yuuri in want – in need to brush his fingers through his long, soft hair. _

_ But Yuuri settled for sitting beside him instead, hands clasped in front of him to keep them to himself. _

_ “You know, I see them sometimes,” Victor spoke, prompting Yuuri to raise a brow. “The crew, I mean. When they leave for land, I see them with women. I know what they do. I overhear them sometimes, but I’ll be honest… I don’t see the appeal in women.” _

_ “Well, they carry our children,” Yuuri replied with a shrug. “And they can be kind, sometimes, and –” _

_ “No, no. I don’t mean like that,” he corrected. “I mean… like having sex with them. I don’t see the appeal in that.” _

_ “Oh.” Yuuri blinked, taken back a little by Victor’s honesty. _

_ He wasn’t surprised by Victor admitting a secret. They often did that during these kinds of nights, but that secret felt… intimate, and special, and Yuuri was honoured to be trusted enough by Victor to admit that to him. _

_ “Is that weird?” _

_ “No,” Yuuri said quick, shaking his head. “No, I see what you mean. I see that interest with women, but I also see it with men too. I’m indifferent, but it’s not weird, Victor.” _

_ Victor said nothing, but his smile spoke a thousand words. He grinned widely, nodding to himself before finally saying – admitting, “yeah. Yeah, I-I like men.” _

_ “That’s good.” Yuuri smiled back. He wasn’t sure how hard that was for Victor to admit. It wasn’t a lot for himself when he realized, but it seemed important to Victor, and he intended to show Victor he didn’t mind by asking, “So, what kind of men?” _

_ “Hm, well, I haven’t really thought about that,” he replied before baring a heart-shaped grin. “I guess I like dark-haired men with brown eyes. They can be very attractive.” _

_ Yuuri’s heart leapt to his throat, trapping his breath and starving his lungs. He knew it didn’t have to mean him. Victor could be referring to those kinds of men in general, but knowing he himself had brown hair and dark eyes, that he was on that list of men Victor found attractive set his heart aflame, burning warmly in his chest. _

_ And usually, Yuuri would blush and turn away. He’d say nothing and make a fool of himself at just a few words, but not this time. If this was Victor trying to flirt with him, Yuuri wished to prove he could do the same. For once, he didn’t want to stay silent. _

_ “I like light-haired men,” he began, proud his voice came out steady. “And blue eyes, too.” _

_ He may have been bold but still he couldn’t look at Victor. He could see him in the corner of his eye. He saw him look at Yuuri, his expression unreadable as Yuuri remained staring ahead. Whatever was read on Victor’s face, Yuuri didn’t see it, but he did feel Victor’s hand link with his. He did feel his grip tighten, and his own heart nearly burst from his chest. _

_ But he still didn’t look. He wasn’t prepared for that, so they stayed in silence, fingers linked and their hearts beating until the crew disturbed the peace. _

_ They didn’t speak of it again, but Yuuri was fine with that. They didn’t need to, because the look Victor gave him the day after spoke enough. It told Yuuri more than he anticipated, and his heart skipped a beat and he smiled fondly, excited for the next night they’d be alone. _

__

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hmMMMmmm, is the King really bad, or am I playing ya'll like a fiddle, making you believe he's the bad guy when the real villain is yet to come??? ;)
> 
> Also, I know it might seem like I glossed over Victor's discovery as the Prince, and technically, I did. Honestly, it didn't seem like a big event for me to write. I think we already knew; it was only Victor and Yuuri who refused to believe it, and making it be such a big thing felt like I was overdoing it. It was never a main focused plot point. We're only just getting into the heavy plot of the story, so more is yet to come!!
> 
> Also, my next chapter may be quite late. I'll be away on holiday for a week, but I might try to get some writing done while I'm out there. Anyone going to Anime Midwest? I plan to go!
> 
> Until next time! Kudos and comments are always appreciated <3


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WHOOPS MONSTER CHAPTER AGAIN LOL SORRY
> 
> Big love to izzy as always <3
> 
> also! WARNINGS!! There will be full SMUT in this chapter, so the usual is ##### if you wish to skip!
> 
> There's also a BLOOD warning in the flashback scene at the end, so be cautious if you don't like that kind of stuff! I'd mostly recommend skipping until the conversation begins

“See, I told you so.”

It was that moment Yuuri realised he misinterpreted Victor’s actions, his words, his expressions for so long. He’d been telling Yuuri this, over and over. He hinted at it, gave Yuuri clues that went over his head. Victor even  _ told _ him, but Yuuri refused to believe it. He shook his head like the stubborn pirate he was, and doubted the one person he trusted the most.

He should explain himself, yet he didn’t know what to say. 

But as Yuuri stared up at the painting, unable to take in Victor’s words properly, he also realized he didn’t need to say anything. The loss of words said enough.

“I think I’ll just let you take this all in,” he heard Victor say somewhere to his left. “It’s a lot. Just don’t think too hard about it.”

Yuuri wasn’t sure how he  _ couldn’t _ think too hard. For all that he doubted – everything Victor told him which he struggled to believe for so long – had been proven by one simple painting.

And he shouldn’t believe it. A part of him told him not to, that this  _ couldn’t _ be Victor and it was all a mistake, but Yuuri could point Victor out from a mile off, even if he was a child, and that painting was him. He shouldn’t be denying this any longer.

It was unmistakable. He had the same silver hair, long and gorgeous – and how Yuuri missed it sometimes. It had his smile with the same little dip in the middle that made his smiles form a heart in his happiest moments, something Yuuri adored to this day. There was even his tiny scar on his hand, faint in the painting but still there, the same place Victor had his own.

This painting was Victor, and Yuuri looked at him wide-eyed and unbelieving, but Victor was right. There had been too many coincidences for this to be wrong. He couldn’t deny this any longer.

“This – this is you,” Yuuri murmured, pointing weakly at the painting as he watched Victor nod. “You’ve… been telling me all this time. You tried to – you’ve been saying this for so long, and I never believed it. I-I…”

And it all came rushing back to him, every moment he rejected and pushed back, ignored and laughed at, all crashing down onto him in a single moment of realisation, and Yuuri acknowledged he was an idiot before he accepted Victor was the Prince.

He had been so ignorant. The clues were there. His own husband tried telling him for so long, but Yuuri had still turned away. He refused it, and he wasn’t sure which was worse, that he struggled to believe Victor, or he acted so alike to his father.

They were just as bad as each other, but knowing he had acted like his father was the worst insult of them all.

“Victor, I –” But he stopped. He looked again, turning from Victor to the painting, his voice caught in his throat as he took it all in. “I’m so sorry. I should have believed you. But fuck, Victor, what do we do?”

“The same thing we always do; we go through this together,” Victor said so easily, reassuring him with a hand on his cheek as he gave a triumphant look. “This doesn’t change our plans. It’s like you said about our vows; it’s you before anyone else, and that stays true.”

“Even your family?”

Victor didn’t hesitate when he nodded. “Even my family.”

“We’re robbing from them, you know,” Yuuri told him, turning away from his touch with his eyes cast to the ground. “They’re your birth parents. They’re family, Victor, and we’re stealing from them so selfishly. Are you sure you’re okay with that?”

When Yuuri turned, he caught Victor hesitating, but he didn’t mention it as Victor nodded again, saying, “Yes. I’m fine with that.”

He didn’t completely believe him. Victor told Yuuri enough truths for him to know when his husband lied, and for all he denied, meeting his family meant something to him. He wouldn’t admit it. Even to Yuuri, he’d shake his head and suggest he was wrong, but Victor had finally met his birth parents, the same people they planned to  _ rob _ . There was no way he was completely fine with that.

_ But _ Victor said he was fine and Yuuri made sure to stick to his promise – to support Victor. He was sure, somewhere in Victor’s logical but forgetful mind, that he wanted to do this regardless who they were to him. And as long as that feeling remained, their plan should continue without any disruptions.

“We should start moving more things,” Yuuri said, turning to fully face Victor with the same expression he’d give his crew – as the Captain he was supposed to be. “Phichit has collected a few vases, and I found this necklace that should be worth something, but we need more.”

“I have been quite neglectful of that,” Victor admitted with a faint laugh, scratching the back of his neck. “And we’ve completely forgotten about those guarded rooms we were once so excited about, haven’t we?”

“Shit.” Yuuri groaned. How stupid of him. “Ugh, look. I might have to leave that in your hands, Victor. The Queen should eventually show you. The Prince – ah, I mean, uh…  _ you _ must’ve had a – a crown, right?”

It felt so strange calling Victor a Prince, but there was no time to dwell on that now. They had a plan to talk through, and Yuuri cleared his throat and shook his head. He needed to get back on track – no more distractions.

“I’ll talk to Mariya when I next see her,” Victor nodded, and for a short moment, Yuuri noticed he called her Mariya, not mother.

_ You’re getting distracted again! _

“Ah – yeah, yeah.” Yuuri exhaled a long breath. “Yeah, she should show you soon, or perhaps you could even ask her?”

“She’s not always around, but I can try,” Victor agreed. “I’ll need to write it down when she shows me. I remember everywhere else, but new places are still hard to recall. I don’t want to forget it if I do find it.”

“Good, that’s good.” Yuuri nodded.

A silence quickly fell between them, and Yuuri wasn’t sure where to look. If he turned to the painting, his mind would wander again, but the silence didn’t help either. All he wanted was to think about Victor’s past, ponder his childhood with these people and hope they treated him better than his father did. Victor deserved the world. It always hurt remembering how some used and abused him.

But those people didn’t matter, and Yuuri reached forward, lacing their fingers together with a reassuring grip. It was them versus the world, them against all those people who doubted them,  _ laughed _ at them, and Yuuri wished they could see them now.

“We’ll be alright, Victor.”

Victor’s smile warmed his restless heart.

“I know.” He nodded. “We’ll get what we want. We always do eventually, right?”

“We will.” Yuuri smiled and kissed his husband’s soft lips. “That’s a promise.”

* * *

 

 

It took Yuuri only a day to realize no matter how quickly they rushed through their plan, something would always get in their way.

Previously, it had been Victor’s discovery, but that was a big one they couldn’t ignore. Currently, it was Phichit making a request to meet the Captain in private, to inform him of some news he discovered, and Yuuri wondered how important it was to request his arrival in the Kingdom that very next morning.

He mentally cursed his quartermaster as he made his move from the castle to the Kingdom, but those thoughts didn’t last long.

Along the way, Yuuri heard whispers.

It wasn’t because of who he was. He may be the Prince’s husband, but Yuuri learned people didn’t care. The most he received were a few glances, and a couple gasps of recognition, but none that made him stop to question if the quiet talk was about him.

People were muttering; their words silent and unheard to Yuuri’s ears no matter how hard he tried to listen. They’d whisper in dark alleys, hidden away until Yuuri found them that they’d stop and stare, silent until he walked away. There were others too, many who’d look around, cautious of who was overhearing private conversations.

And after a while, Yuuri began to question what was really going on.

This wasn’t the same Kingdom they first arrived in. Nor was it the same atmosphere Yuuri felt the last few times he visited. There was a change – a shift in the air, thick and heavy unlike the unsatisfying atmosphere it had before. This was unsettling, quaking Yuuri down to the bones that he’d check over his shoulder often, just as cautious as those whispering.

There was nobody there – at least, nobody staring. He should be fine, although he certainly didn’t feel it.

But Yuuri continued onwards, strong and brave, his promise to Phichit repeating in his mind. Whatever his quartermaster had to say to him was important. He couldn’t back away now, but Yuuri didn’t feel safe until he stepped foot in the same tavern he and Victor stayed in their first night.

It hadn’t changed much. The brother was at the bar without his twin this time. Yuuri wasn’t sure which he’d prefer, but the brother was silent, offering Yuuri a quick glare before ignoring him, and that was how he preferred it.

 “Phichit.” Yuuri grinned, stepping over to his quartermaster already sat with two drinks on the table. “It’s been a while.”

“Captain!” Phichit gasped, speaking a little too loudly that Yuuri panicked. He spun, but nobody seemed to notice – nobody but Phichit who had his hand slapped over his mouth. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to say that out loud…”

Yuuri exhaled a breath, shaking his head. Phichit may be the best option to be the next Captain, but he still had his moments.

“Come on, just sit down,” he said, deciding to just get to the point as they sat. “You said you had something important to tell me?”

Phichit hummed behind his drink, taking a quick mouthful before saying, “Yes, I do. It’s about the kid.”

“You haven’t killed him, have you?”

“Oh, no. I’ve been trying very hard not to,” Phichit said, grinning with pride. Yuuri smiled too, mostly from relief, but some of it was in delight. “But no, it’s not that. It’s something he told me, something that’s very important which I know you would benefit from.”

Yuuri raised a brow. “What is it?”

“He may be our captive, but he can ruin your plan just being one,” Phichit began, and nothing could help Yuuri’s heart when it stopped entirely. “The kid is royalty, but he’s more than I assumed. His father was the King’s brother. He died, which left the kid as the next heir to the throne. He was supposed to be King when the King dies, but you know where he is…”

“He’s on our ship,” Yuuri answered, unsure why Phichit bothered to bring it up. “But we already assumed he was close with these royals. Why does this matter to me?”

“He’s supposed to return soon,” Phichit replied, and Yuuri finally realized why he was saying this. “I don’t know how long, but when he doesn’t return, people will ask questions. And if you ask me, Captain… it’s rather suspicious that he went missing just as you and Victor arrived.”

“Shit,” Yuuri swore, running his fingers through his hair. “I didn’t think of that. I thought he might be a soldier.”

“He says you’re in danger too,” Phichit continued. “If the King finds out who you are… Yuuri, I don’t think your position will help defend yourself. Victor may be assumed the Prince, but…”

“No, he’s the Prince,” Yuuri spoke, disturbing his quaking heart for just a moment to change the subject, to inform Phichit of their most recent discovery. “I mean the real Prince. The one who went missing.”

Phichit was silent, staring at Yuuri with an expression that had him fidget. He understood his quartermaster’s silence, but the look he gave him, Yuuri finally realized why Victor was so desperate for Yuuri to believe him when he did the same.

“Forgive me, Captain,” Phichit began, breaking the silence as he cleared his throat. “But are you sure?”

“I know. I hardly believed it myself, but it’s the truth.” Yuuri stared until Phichit exhaled a breath. Whether he believed him or not didn’t matter; Yuuri had more he needed to say. “But tell me more about the King. I know I’m in danger if he catches my scar, which he won’t, but what I need to know is if my Victor’s in danger. Will the King hurt Victor?”

“I don’t know.” Phichit shrugged. “The kid said the Prince had enemies. If that’s true, then that means Victor…”

“Is in danger too.”

Yuuri leaned forward against the table, hand pressed over his mouth as he breathed deeply through his nose. He’d be an idiot to assume they were completely safe in the castle. It may have guards and soldiers and many staff who could catch anyone suspicious, but even they could be a threat. There was no telling. Yuuri had no idea who may or may not harm them. He was losing control, and everything about that ached his heart and frightened his mind.

“Captain…?”

“We can’t leave now,” Yuuri announced, sitting upright in his chair with a heavy breath. “We’re too far into this plan. We’d have wasted so much time if we did. But I can’t leave Victor unprotected in that castle, either. If he’s hurt while I’m not there, I won’t ever forgive myself for that.”

“And I think he’d feel the same in return,” Phichit told him. It didn’t help him feel any better. “Captain, I think you both will be fine when it comes to defending yourselves. With or without a sword, you’ll keep each other safe. I just worry about this King.”

“I knew there was something off with him,” Yuuri declared, scowling heavily. “I knew it. He didn’t sit well in my gut when I met him and of course, this explains it. Why would he be anything but kind towards a Pirate? Not that he knows, I think… but still, I knew it.”

“I can’t help much, but I can only give my advice. Keep yourself and Victor away from him. It won’t solve everything, but it’ll protect you.”

Yuuri sighed as he nodded, ignoring the headache slowly forming in his skull. There were worse things to stress about; Yuuri knew that, but still, the thought invaded his mind in an endless loop making him worried, paranoid, fearful – obsessed with the need to protect himself and Victor.

There were worse things to stress about, but Yuuri seemed unable to reassure himself.

“Captain.” Phichit sighed, and Yuuri already didn’t like the sound of his voice. “I don’t want to add to the stress, but there’s another situation.”

Yuuri swallowed back the bile in his throat.

“What now?”

“There’s a ship docked nearby. It’s another Pirate ship.”

He shrugged. “So?”

“Captain. It’s Captain JJ’s ship.”

Yuuri paused as his breath stopped completely, his lungs void of the oxygen he desperately needed to contain himself.

He should have seen this coming.

“Are you kidding me?” Yuuri asked, lips twisted into a tight scowl. “What the hell does he want?”

“I don’t know,” Phichit inhaled, shaking his head. “But I’m worried. He’s worse than the kid, and the kid’s been hard not to hurt. I don’t know how I’ll handle him if he arrives with demands. What if he wants the kid?”

“Don’t hand him over,” Yuuri warned. “JJ might not even know we have him. If you keep him where he is, you should be fine. Just make a deal with him, shake hands on it, and if he breaks it, kill him. I should have done that years ago, honestly.”

“And if he knows the kid’s there?”

Yuuri paused.

“Let me know,” he replied with a sigh. “I’ll return to the ship for a moment to sort it out. Or we’ll meet halfway. I can’t leave Victor alone in that castle for too long, not while the King is there.”

“I’ll try.” Phichit gulped. “I know you have a lot going on back at the castle, and I don’t want you to think I have to rely on you for everything…”

“I’m the Captain, Phichit. It’s my job to have a lot going on.” He smiled weakly. “Listen, I have to head back. There’s something about this Kingdom I want to investigate too, so keep me posted on JJ. I don’t want him causing us any trouble, okay?”

“Of course, Captain.”

They parted ways not long after. His quartermaster didn’t wish to return just yet, prolonging his departure until Yuuri reminded him of the danger – the possibility that JJ might have already invaded the ship. Phichit was gone in a heartbeat, and Yuuri’s paranoia returned, pondering if his excuse might be true.

But he shook his head to himself, leaving the tavern with a heavy mind. There was so much to do and not enough hours in the day. Yuuri wished he had more time, but alas, there was only so much he could do. He may be a pirate Captain, but he wasn’t made of magic.

He decided, during his travel back to the castle, to investigate a little further into the Kingdom’s secrets. He might as well while he was there, marching through the town square to avoid the dead Pirate still hung by its neck. He tugged at his sleeve, ignoring the paranoia gnawing at his brain as he tried harder to listen to the whispers.

He wished he wore a disguise like he intended, or never revealed himself to begin with. It would’ve been far easier if he hadn’t, but even Yuuri made mistakes, and listening into secret whispers was harder than anticipated. They were too aware of him – too cautious, it even put Yuuri to the test, but he was determined.

Then there was a bark, and Yuuri hardly saw what pounced on him as he went tumbling to the ground.

He felt the lick of a tongue before he noticed the smell, and he pushed the fluffy body aside. It was a dog – a smelly old mutt panting in his face with its tongue stuck out. Its coat was filthy, fur which should’ve been a clean beige littered with brown dirt patches, and he should shoo it away. It caused enough trouble and attention already, but Yuuri found himself smiling a little.

It was cute – smelly, but cute, and he then pushed himself up to pet the dog.

“Well, you’re a weirdly cute little thing, aren’t you?” he asked, not expecting the mutt to respond when it barked. “Hm, so no collar. You’ve clearly not bathed in a while either. I’m not a fan of you strays; I’ve had enough mutts like you stealing food off my ship, you know.”

The dog’s whine had Yuuri sigh, and he began searching through his bag for some food when he caught it – a whisper. It was quiet, somewhere to his left, and Yuuri paused for a moment to listen further.

His assumption was correct. He couldn’t see anyone down the alley he observed, but there was definitely a voice somewhere hidden in its depths, and Yuuri crept through the small space, lurking further until the voices gradually became louder, and he finally heard them – three voices to his left, and a silent mutt to his right.

“I don’t know what’s going to happen. They haven’t told us a thing.”

Yuuri raised a brow, and turned to the mutt, placing a finger against his lips to tell it to stay silent.

“Oh, don’t be stupid!” a voice argued – a female. “He’ll continue his responsibility and be our King when Zakhar dies. And when he does, things will be better. It’ll be so much better.”

“But what about Yuri?” a male voice asked, and Yuuri held his breath. “He’s only been away for a month, but the King’s already taken a toll on us. He’s raised the taxes and I can hardly feed my children anymore. How long is this going to continue before we finally do something about it?”

Yuuri knew he shouldn’t be smiling, but the more he heard about the King, the better he felt, and gleefully winked at the mutt beside him. It reacted with a slimy lick on his hand.

“Whatever happens, the kid or the Prince will be better off,” another voice responded. It was a male, but sounded far older than the other. “It’s time we do something. Everyone has been talking about it. If the palace won’t tell us who’s the next heir, then we’ll demand it. We’ll storm inside, make the King beg for his life and give up the crown like he should have done years ago.”

“And it’s stupidly convenient how Prince Victor went missing  _ just  _ as we were planning to do so,” the male scoffed. Yuuri’s gut twisted painfully, but he held his tongue, holding back the need to demand more. “You don’t reckon the King planned that, do you?”

“I doubt it,” the female replied. “He was close to losing the crown as it is; he wouldn’t risk doing something that chaotically stupid. He may be charming and have good intentions, but he’s been the worst. He’s killed more than necessary. We’ve been through far too many wars. He’s as bloodthirsty as those Pirates invading our seas, but I dare say even they would make better Kings.”

“He’s just greedy,” the older male replied. “But if he continues the way he’s going, this Kingdom will perish. Even the Prince’s husband would make a better leader, and it’s about time we finally step forward and force him out of the throne.”

Yuuri exhaled a breath, stepping backwards. He heard enough. The King, whether good or bad, was clearly a terrible leader and Yuuri didn’t try to bite back his smile. It seemed a revolution was brewing – that, or perhaps a Kingdom of exhausted people needing a new ruler.

Whichever it was, Yuuri was pleased to hear it. It would keep the man busy. He should stay away from Victor, and Yuuri smiled at the dog happily wagging its tail.

“You’re a good little spy, aren’t you?” He grinned, ruffling the mutt’s fur. “I think I’ll keep you.”

The dog replied with a bark and followed Yuuri closely behind.

He still feared the King in many ways, and the revolution didn’t sit well in his gut, but there were some positives and Yuuri tried to focus on them. It was hard, and he was paranoid, and overhearing that conversation still didn’t reassure Yuuri that the King didn’t have cold intentions, but he felt better. Almost.

As long as he stayed far, far away from Victor, Yuuri could sleep at night.

* * *

 

 

“Oh, Yuuri!” Victor cried happily, letting the dirty mutt lick his face. “You shouldn’t have. She’s so adorable!”

“I wouldn’t let her do that…”

“Oh, come on. She doesn’t smell  _ that _ bad,” he argued, and Yuuri would have protested if he believed his husband would listen. “I think we should name her Makkachin. She looks like a Makkachin, doesn’t she?”

“She looks more like a dog to me,” Yuuri muttered, but Victor didn’t hear. “We should bathe her, or get someone else to do it. I have a lot I need to tell you Victor. It’s important, and I think minimal distractions will help you remember.”

Victor paused, turning to Yuuri with a worried expression painted on his face.

“It’s that important?”

Yuuri nodded, and that got him to pay attention. He moved the dog aside, passing her onto the closest person who could take care of her as they left for the privacy of their room. And that was where Yuuri sat Victor down, gripped his hand, and repeated everything Phichit told him – and more.

Victor stayed silent throughout the entire explanation, and it wasn’t until Yuuri mentioned the revolution that he finally asked, “A revolution? I didn’t think I was that good of a Prince. Perhaps in the past, before I forgot everything. I wonder what happened.”

“And after everything I told you, that’s what you question?”

“JJ doesn’t scare me, and I know the dangers of us being here,” Victor explained. “But a  _ revolution _ ? Now that’s something I’d like to hear more about. I don’t know how Zakhar treats the Kingdom and in a way, I don’t care. As long as this doesn’t interfere with our plan, he can be overthrown a thousand times. It’s our future I care about.”

Yuuri exhaled a breath, shaking his head to himself. “I told you there was something wrong about the King.”

“Kings can be bad leaders; it doesn’t mean he’s a bad person,” Victor defended, and Yuuri couldn’t believe he was still turning the other cheek, but he didn’t bother to argue. He didn’t have the energy to. “I spoke to Mariya about him before. He’s lost a lot. I know that’s not an excuse, because we’ve lost a lot, but…”

“But we’re not exactly good people ourselves, are we, Victor?” he asked. His husband didn’t respond. “We lie. We steal. We leave places in fire and mayhem when we leave and treat them like it’s nothing. If the King is hated by his own people, then he must be doing something wrong.”

“Yuuri, just…” Victor tried, but his explanation fell short, settling with exhaling a heavy breath.

But Yuuri swallowed thickly at his realisation. “Is this what it was like when I didn’t believe you were the Prince?” he asked. “Where it feels like you’re so desperate for the other to believe you, only to wonder if you’re reading too far into things?”

“Pretty much.” Victor nodded.

Yuuri hadn’t realised before. He always doubted Victor was the Prince, especially when his husband came to him about it, and Yuuri finally understood why he was so desperate for him to believe him. It was the desire to not be alone in this – to reassure himself that he wasn’t being paranoid, cautious, or distrustful.

It was expecting Victor would believe him no matter what he came out with, and Yuuri forgot how relationships weren’t always so black and white.

“We should get the last of our stuff and leave this place as soon as we can,” Yuuri continued, turning his gaze to the ground. “I don’t want to spend another minute here, and knowing we’re counting down the days until that kid is supposed to return is making me panic. I don’t know how long we have.”

Victor’s hand brushing his hair back used to soothe him, but not now. It had his teeth grit, fists clench, and he didn’t need to hear Victor’s obvious words as he said, “Yuuri, you’re stressed.”

And like an elastic band, Yuuri snapped.

“Well, of course I’m stressed!” he shouted, storming to his feet in his rage. “I’ve got the King I’m worried about and my scar that could be found. I can’t risk dying, Victor. Not now. And JJ is lurking around the corner, but I don’t know what he wants from me. The Kingdom is going into a rebellion and I don’t know how long we have until that sets off. We haven’t gotten enough gold to last us as long as we need. We’ve hardly found anything worth real value. This entire thing is at a standstill, and the longer I stay here, the more I wish we just stayed on our ship and… and just ignored all this.”

When Yuuri spun, Victor was there, gently cupping his cheeks until his breath slowly eased. He hadn’t realized he grew into such a panic, but looking back into his husband's eyes – watching those beautiful blue oceans hold his gaze and distract him from all the hurt in the world – helped ease his chest. It calmed his breathing, settling to a gentle pace as Victor’s hands moved to link with Yuuri’s.

“You’re letting this get to you. You know that, right?”

“It’s a lot for me to keep track of,” Yuuri replied weakly, ignoring the tears building in his eyes. “I don’t want anyone to get hurt. Especially you. I could never forgive myself if you got hurt again, just because I didn’t catch something in time. It’s happened before, Victor. I refuse to let it happen again.”

Yuuri tried hard not to look, but his eyes turned to Victor’s neck, eyeing the scar stretched across the side of his column. That was a hard day. If the blade had been inches to the side, Victor wouldn’t have made it, but the scar held a reminder. It told Yuuri to be cautious and quick and wary of those who may hurt the people he loves.

And watching Victor’s hand reach up to touch the scar twisted his heart into knots. They both had scars, and very few they blamed themselves for, but those that did hurt the most.

“I should’ve been quicker to move. We’ve spoken about this,” Victor reminded, but it didn’t help. “But I get it, Yuuri. I never stopped those men from branding you. I was too late, and I let them hurt you, so trust me when I say I understand.”

Yuuri tried to tell Victor it wasn’t his fault, that he too should’ve been quicker, but his words failed him. His voice stayed trapped in his throat, and all Yuuri could do was close his eyes and rest his forehead against Victor’s, taking a moment to cherish in his husband’s touch.

“It’s a hard life, being a pirate.”

“Nobody ever said it was easy,” Victor whispered. “Captain Katsuki made it seem so easy, but he had no heart.”

“He didn’t care who he lost.” Yuuri growled, pulling back and meeting Victor’s stare with immense fury. “He let my mother and sister die. He never tried to save them. He was a selfish man and he had nothing to lose, but I have too much. I can’t be the same as him, Victor. You know I can’t.”

“And you’re not,” Victor reassured him, placing a gentle kiss to his lips. “You’re a better man than him. You care for your crew and you look out for them. You’re a loving, gentle, kind husband who cares about me so much, I don’t think my heart can always take it.”

Yuuri chewed his lips. “I just hope it’s enough.”

“It’s enough, Yuuri.” Victor grinned, kissing him harder. “It’s always enough.”

Yuuri wasn’t sure what he ever did to deserve Victor. He found him at sea. He rescued him from imminent danger, and crushed on him the moment he saw him. He lusted over him, loved him, adored everything about Victor while they grew up together, and somewhere along the way, he did something right. He did something worth Victor’s time, Victor’s love, and he was so, so thankful.

He didn’t know where he’d be without Victor. He might’ve perished with his father or left long ago in search for a new life to live, but Yuuri didn’t like to think about that. He couldn’t imagine a life without him because even in his daydreams where he pondered, Victor always appeared somewhere. He was there, loving Yuuri in ways nobody had ever loved him before.

He was a stupidly lucky man, but nothing about their love was ever luck. It was born and earned and gained through trust, dedication, and respect.

“Everything will be okay, Yuuri,” Victor said as he pulled back for a breath, but Yuuri couldn’t help but indulge in another quick kiss. “We’ve made it this far. We can continue even further, beyond our lives as Pirates. When this is over, we’re free, and there will be no more paranoia or worrying or people hunting for us, but we need to keep a level head. Do you think you can do that?”

“Even if I can’t, there’s no way I’m leaving you here alone,” Yuuri stated firmly, brushing his fingers through Victor’s fringe. “You know, I don’t think I tell you often enough that I love you.”

Victor laughed. “I don’t think you need to.”

“Even if it’s true?” Yuuri asked, and grinned as Victor’s own smile stretched wider. “Because I love you, Victor.”

#######

“I love you too, Yuuri,” Victor said, and hummed as they kissed. “You know, we haven’t made love in a while, and it’s the perfect way to distract yourself. Would you like to do it today?”

“Yes.  _ Please _ ,” Yuuri almost begged, inhaling a long breath to control himself. “I – I don’t know if I can go easy, but –”

“Just try to take your time, Yuuri.” Victor smiled, and gently tugged Yuuri forward until they tumbled onto the bed, Yuuri hovering over his husband with desire burning through his veins. “Don’t think about the King, or JJ, or anyone else beyond this room. Focus on me and only me, okay?”

“I’ll try,” Yuuri muttered. “And I’m not sure I can take my time, but I promise, I’ll try.”

“Then take control, and I’ll fully surrender,” Victor whispered against his ear, prompting shivers to descend down Yuuri’s spine. “Do whatever you like, and ask for whatever you wish. You know I’ll tell you if I don’t want to do something.”

“I know.” Yuuri nodded, and paused, thinking. “I think I want to pretend tonight.”

“Oh?”

“I’m a pirate Captain, and you’re a Prince.”

Victor laughed lightly. “But isn’t that already what we are?”

“I mean like, roleplay, I guess,” Yuuri admitted, humiliation burning his cheeks as he looked away. “Don’t make this awkward for me.”

“I won’t. It sounds fun.” Victor grinned and Yuuri turned back, meeting his husband's thrilled gaze. “I’ll be your darling Prince, and you’ll be the pirate Captain who’s stolen me away from my hard, lonely life.”

“Yes, like that.” Yuuri nodded. “Keep going.”

“We’re secret lovers, daring to test the system with our love, looking for a night of slow and careful lovemaking to proclaim our dedication to one another, to show our love in a way we’ve never done before.”

“I love you, my Prince,” Yuuri whispered softly, and kissed Victor’s soft lips. He took his fill, taking a moment to bask in its obsession before allowing Victor more time to talk – to set the scene and continue.

“And there’s so much expected from me too, but for a night, I wish to surrender under the pirate Captain who will care for me, and love me as I am,” Victor whispered, encouraging Yuuri to groan and grind forward against his husband, clothed erections pressing against one another with satisfying pleasure. “I’m your Prince made of silver and gold, fine treasure to add to your collection.”

“You’re mine.” Yuuri growled lowly, biting Victor’s neck. “My sweet Prince, Victor. My love, my life, my everything.”

“Come on, Captain,” Victor teased – seductive, and Yuuri whined at the name. “Show a Prince what it’s like to be bed by a Pirate.”

“You’re going to kill me, Victor.” Yuuri groaned, frantic fingers moving to rip off his shirt with quick aggression. Something ripped, but neither mentioned it, and in his haste worked on removing Victor’s own.

“I know.” Victor giggled, allowing Yuuri to quickly tug his shirt off. He threw it to the side and began working on removing Victor’s pants as he continued; “just imagine what the Kingdom may think, a pirate Captain bedding a Prince. Oh, how everyone will talk.”

“Then let them,” Yuuri said, having completely removed Victor’s pants as he now kissed down his neck and settled on delving his fingers through his husbands’ soft locks. “Let them know only I can do this to you. Let them know who you belong to, who loves you in a way nobody else can.”

“Hm, yes, Captain.” Victor hummed, looking down to slowly work on removing Yuuri’s pants, hands on his belt buckle and trousers. “As long as I’m with you, my Captain, they’ll know just how much you love me.”

Yuuri swore under his breath and let Victor remove his pants, both soon completely naked and desperately hard. But neither moved to touch each other yet. For now, Yuuri wished to kiss Victor. He wanted to touch him, love him, treat him the way he deserved with nothing but praise falling past his lips and the intention to turn him into nothing but a writhing mess, desperate, begging, with only Yuuri’s name on his tongue.

And although Yuuri promised he would try to take his time, he didn’t waste a second to reach for the vial of oil. He pressed a finger into him, smooth and wet and hot as he took his time working Victor open.

He pushed and pulled his fingers with gentle intimacy, touching a part of his husband nobody dared to touch – unless they wished to meet the end of his blade. Victor gasped softly, stifling a groan as Yuuri wrapped his lips around a nipple and gently sucked, nibbling, biting, taking his fill of the delicious sounds Victor exhaled.

Then, a second finger pushed in. And soon, Victor writhed as a third was pressed into him, blunt nails trailing down Yuuri’s back as he pushed into Victor slowly, easing each digit all the way inside just to pull back out again, and push inside once more, stretching him well with a steady and agonizingly slow pace.

And Victor squirmed beneath him, shifting to roll his hips against Yuuri’s fingers, pushing in that little bit further. He was growing desperate. His heavy breaths told him so, and Yuuri’s cock would thank him if he went ahead and made love already, but he had made a promise. Desperation was a drug, but Yuuri had better control than this.

Still, listening to Victor’s moans had him almost tip over the edge. Almost.

“Yuuri! Yuuri, just –  _ Ah! _ ” Victor gasped, exhaling a heavy moan as Yuuri mouthed the base of his neck and grinded their lengths together. “Hurry. Please. Yuuri. I can’t – I need – I need you now. Please. Captain, please.”

As Yuuri pulled back, eyes wide and frozen, he nearly lost himself there and then.

“Beg like that again and I don’t think I’ll be able to control myself.”

Victor whimpered, low and softly, and he didn’t need to say anything more for Yuuri to finally remove his fingers from inside Victor, ignoring his whine and leaving him helplessly empty as he reached for the vial of oil, lathering his cock in the slick substance.

“I know I promised I’d try taking my time,” Yuuri said as he lined himself right, pressing the tip of his cock carefully against Victor’s hole. “But I’m not sure how gentle I can be.”

“If you go gentle, I think I’ll scream in frustration.” Victor growled. “Do it. Please. Captain, I’m ready. I’m –”

But Victor never got another word out, his sentence cut short by a stifled gasp as Yuuri pushed inside him slowly, his cock dragging along his walls, the feel of it wonderfully intimate. They’ve made love countless of times in every way they could, but Yuuri could never grow tired of it, never tire of the way Victor felt so warm around him, or how he tightened around him when Yuuri was fully inside his husband.

Yuuri stopped for a moment to catch his breath, taking in small gasps to control himself, keep from pushing too fast too soon. It was hard not to. When he caught sight of Victor, silver hair splayed like a halo and wet, reddened lips gasping for his own relief, Yuuri would’ve finished embarrassingly quick if he didn’t catch himself, instead turning his attention to mouth along Victor’s chest as he finally began to move.

He pushed in and out of Victor with a steady pace, controlling the urge to pound into him by nibbling the base of Victor’s ear and peppering kisses along his neck. He almost didn’t wish to control the urges, but rather let them take their fill, reckless and free and untamed as he’d press further into Victor with wild aggression, but not yet.

Yuuri may be desperate, and needy, and dying to turn Victor into a writhing mess, but a part of him still wished to make this last.

He missed this – the smells, the sounds, and Yuuri knew he would do this to Victor whenever he pleased if he could. It was obsessive. The push and pull of his cock inside his husband sent shockwaves through his spine, tightening his gut with a pleasing warmth that could drive anyone crazy with lust, but Yuuri had better control than that.

He paced himself, drinking up the sounds of Victor’s loud pants.

Somewhere along the way, Yuuri slowed; a strange feeling bubbled inside. It wasn’t desire but rather a weight on his chest, heavy and aching, driving Yuuri to chew his lip just to bite back the lump in his throat.

He wasn’t sure what it was. Perhaps it had been the day finally catching up to him, or that he came back to a husband who could always sooth and calm and care for him no matter how awful he felt, but his heart ached in the best way. It was hard to contain. It was so much too soon, and Yuuri pressed his face into Victor’s neck, breathing heavily as tears welled up in his eyes.

“Yuuri?” Victor eventually asked, noticing his distress as his fingers delved into Yuuri’s hair. “Yuuri, are you okay?”

But Yuuri had better control than this.

“Yeah, Yeah. I just…” He sighed as he stopped pressing into Victor, pausing for a moment to compose himself. It was hard with the ache of his heart, and the sob threatening to break loose, but Yuuri tried.

“Yuuri?”

He chewed his lip, trembling. “I just – I just really love you, Victor.

And that was all Yuuri needed to break, tears flowing freely down his cheeks as he exhaled a shaky breath, forcing himself to regain that control he was so desperate to hold onto. His hands gripped Victor tighter, frantic to keep hold of what could disappear so easily and bury himself into his comforting warmth, but then a hand brushed his fringe back, and Yuuri finally looked up.

There his husband laid, hair messily splayed and cheeks flushed, a thumb delicately brushing across Yuuri’s cheeks to wipe the tears away as he smiled softly. And Yuuri shouldn’t have looked. It didn’t help stop the tears, but it did help in other ways.

“Hey,” Victor spoke in a soft voice. “Since when did you get so emotional during sex?”

Yuuri paused for a moment, blinking with surprise until he exhaled a weak laugh. It was a poor attempt at humour, a subtle way to help Yuuri feel better. He appreciated the attempt.

“I don’t,” he whispered, gasping lightly when Victor purposefully tightened around his cock. “O-only around you.”

Victor smiled warmly, his hand sliding up Yuuri’s arm as he cupped his cheek and turned Yuuri into a kiss he promptly welcomed. Their lips opened when Yuuri slid his tongue inside, teasing the inside of Victor’s mouth with hungry desire until he began to move again, gently pushing inside Victor as his gasp broke the kiss.

“I love you Yuuri,” Victor whispered, and Yuuri paused, stunned. It wasn’t a surprise. He already knew, but it still felt like a first time, those three words shocking him to the core no matter how often they told each other. “I love you so much.”

And Yuuri kissed him again, spending a few short moments tasting Victor before he thrusted harder, rocking his husband on the bed. His hands wrapped around his waist, nails digging into his skin as Victor’s own scratched marks down his back, evidence of this night imprinted on his skin, a mark he’d wear with pride.

Then Yuuri shifted, taking Victor by the ass as he lifted him, the new angle rubbing along a place that had him shudder and moan, brutally tightening around Yuuri’s cock. He swore under his breath as he stopped thrusting, but rutted into him instead with shorter, rougher strokes.

His cock ached as he kept Victor so full, and somewhere along the line Yuuri hit that spot again. Victor’s back arched, exhaling a deep moan, and he couldn’t stop his hand from wrapping around Victor’s cock, stroking along with his thrusts until he came, and Yuuri soon to follow.

Then there was a moment – a high between the exhaustion and pleasure, so blissful until it faded, and Yuuri collapsed beside Victor, the mess between them ignored as they paused to catch their breaths.

“Remind me why we don’t do that as often?”

Yuuri let out a breathy laugh, brushing a hand over his face. Victor had a point. They never had privacy like this before; never had the freedom to make love as often as they’d like because nobody ever disturbed them here, but Yuuri didn’t have an answer.

“We should,” he muttered with a satisfied sigh. “Or perhaps we’re waiting until we leave, when we have our own home somewhere far away from anyone who could hear us. We should make up for all the times we missed.”

“Hm, yes. I like the sound of that.” Victor grinned, nosing into Yuuri’s throat as he curled into his warmth. “You know, Yuuri. I think I might be in love with you.”

Yuuri let out a loud laugh. “What makes you say that?”

“I don’t think I have enough time to explain my reasons.”

And Yuuri smiled stupidly, allowing it to stretch across his face shamelessly. He probably looked like a mess but there was no reason to hide it. His husband deserved to see Yuuri’s happiness, and he cupped Victor’s cheek, turning him in for a kiss – slow and sweet.

“I love you too, you idiot.”

#######

 

* * *

 

 

_ There was so much blood. _

_ Yuuri ran alongside the crew pulling Victor onto the ship, a faint trail of crimson following behind as they dragged him on board, limp body relying on their strength to get him to safety, to stop the bleeding before it was too late. _

_ And Yuuri’s heart hammered in his chest, reckless and painful. _

_ There was his father shouting somewhere behind him, and the frantic voices of his crew scrambling to find a way to help Victor, but Yuuri tuned that out long ago. Everything turned into a blur after the attack. Only Victor remained in focus, his only concern. _

_ This was his own fault. He was told to watch that pirate, ensure nobody made any quick attempts to harm his father while a deal was made. Yuuri watched them like a hawk. He never turned away, his promise to his father repeating in his mind, but the man moved too quickly. He caught only the glint of a dagger before he saw red, and whatever happened after that was a blur – a confusing, forgettable mess Yuuri couldn’t recall. _

_ But he remembered seeing Victor on the ground, skin pale and neck so deeply red, a wound made from the man with the dagger. _

_ This was his fault. It was all his fault. _

_ “You stupid boy!” his father shouted, snapping Yuuri from his daze with the startled jolt of his heart. “I told you to watch them. I told you to ensure none of them would harm us, and look what happened, Yuuri. Look at him!” _

_ He didn’t want to. He had seen enough, but Yuuri still looked, pained eyes turned to the only one he cared about. They were underdeck now. Victor’s limp body rested on the ship’s floor with a white cloth pressed against his neck, stained with the blood of the man he wished to protect with his life. _

_ Yuuri’s heart ached and tore, the pain too much to bear. _

_ “I watched them.” He gulped, voice so weak and low, he hardly heard himself. But his father did, his glare still harsh. “They moved so quickly. I – I couldn’t even reach for my sword in time. He already hurt him by the time I reacted. I – I tried. I really did try-!” _

_ “I don’t want to hear it,” his father snapped, stepping so close Yuuri could feel his hot breath and taste the poison of each word. “He could have died because of you.” _

_ He couldn’t look at his father. Because if he did, he feared Victor may not be the only one needing to seek medical attention. _

_ His blood boiled with the elixir of rage, burning and strong with wild fury. Yuuri didn’t need to be told. He knew well enough, was aware of the risk Victor was in and the potential end that may come, but his father didn’t need to tell him. He didn’t need to dig that into his skin like a constant bother – a forceful and infuriating poke. _

_ “He’s not going to die.” _

_ He didn’t completely believe his own words, but it helped contain that fire. For now. _

_ “Perhaps I should let him.” His father growled, and Yuuri’s blood ran cold. “It’ll at least teach you a lesson. His death could mean something, let you learn a thing or two about-” _

_ Then Yuuri snapped, and he lost all control. _

_ His father’s words stopped as he rushed forward, tight fingers gripping his shoulders as he slammed him against the ship’s walls. He reached for his dagger, grip so tight as it pressed against his neck. Any closer and it could draw blood, but not so far that his father didn’t feel it, and Yuuri wanted him to. He wanted him to feel fear and regret and terror, and never say those words again. _

_ “If you let him die, nothing will stop me from coming back to make you regret that.” Yuuri snarled, unstoppable. _

_ He never felt anger like this – never rage so aggressive that he would consider murdering his own father, but he wondered if it would matter if he did. He’d become another number added to Yuuri’s list, a statistic and nothing more. Perhaps then the man would mean something to him. _

_ “You sound so certain.” _

_ “I am,” he snapped. “Because if he’s gone, I have nothing else to live for. Not this ship, this crew, not even you, Father.” _

_ Yuuri anticipated his reaction when there was a pause, but then his father laughed. He sniggered, condescending and bitter, but there was humour somewhere in his chuckle, like Yuuri’s rage was amusing to him. _

_ “There’s the son I raised,” he praised, patting his cheek as Yuuri lowered the knife, stunned. “If that was anyone else, I would’ve thrown them off the ship by now, but I’ve been waiting for this. I’ve wondered how long it would take for you to retaliate, to act like a Captain.” _

_ Yuuri wanted to scream. He wished to yell and shout and wreak havoc on this vessel, but he was too stunned to even utter a word. If everything his father said was nothing but a test, he wasn’t sure how he’d cope. _

_ “What do you mean?” he demanded, inquiring more of his father’s explanation. _

_ But the man only grinned, ignoring his question as he stepped closer. Using the knife was tempting, but that was what he wanted, and Yuuri never wished to give into anything his father desired. _

_ “Now, don’t you worry about little Victor here,” his father spoke, turning Yuuri’s gaze to Victor still resting on the ground. “That pirate didn’t stab him. He missed. It’s only just a deep scratch, but he’ll survive this, so nobody will die today.” _

_ Yuuri’s shoulders fell, body slack as his father carefully took his dagger from his grip. There was a desire to scream, but he had no fight left in him. _

_ He fell to his knees beside Victor, tears threatening to spill as he grasped Victor’s hand tightly. It wasn’t returned, but Yuuri still took comfort in the touch, pressing a soft kiss to his knuckles as he silently prayed for Victor to wake up soon. _

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't intend to write smut, and I fully blame (thank) leedelee on discord for this
> 
> also yeah sorry for the monster chapter again. They tend to keep growing, especially when i have so much I need to unpack in one chapter. This one couldn't be split. There was so much that needed to happen, especially now we're finally getting into the main plot point - the build of this fic!  
> (And yes, at 50,000 words, I'm finally at that point. Maybe I should tag this as a slow build? XD)
> 
> My vacation was also nice. It was good to get away for a week, but I'm back, refreshed, and ready to keep writing!
> 
> Kudos and comments are always welcomed, and feed my soul, and will absolutely block the void of doubt that makes me sad sometimes  
> Hope ya'll enjoyed it!!
> 
>  
> 
> EDIT: I ALMOST FORGOT! I'm working on a drawing for this fic too! It's in the process... not really close to being finished, but it's something. I'm excited!


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Big big love to izzy as always! <3

Phichit breathed in, watching the ship across the way stay perfectly still.

The ocean breeze was strong that evening; each wave crashing against the ship coated his skin in a light mist of brine, leaving it salty to taste. It used to be soothing, the sound, but not today. It wasn’t enough to ease the ache in his heavy heart, because for all he denied, Phichit was afraid.

The man on board that rival ship didn’t scare him. He had faced him before, and he would again; Phichit’s only wish was to do his Captain proud.

Yuuri declared him quartermaster for a reason. He wasn’t a fool – reckless, perhaps, but Yuuri knew what he was going. He may not be as carefully crafted as Victor, but he thought things through. He tried to make the right decisions. He did what was best for himself and his crew, and Yuuri didn’t make choices on a whim.

He wouldn’t have asked Phichit as quartermaster if he didn’t believe in him.

He often questioned Yuuri’s reason behind his decision. There were others worthy of his trust. He could have asked Victor, but they were always going to be together; it made sense why he didn’t. There were still others, like Seung-Gil who was smart and quick-witted, or Minami, that energetic boy who was desperate to follow in his Captain’s footsteps.

They were all better choices, but Yuuri asked him. He chose the chaotic orphan boy with unstoppable rage and aggression. He chose the man who often killed the wrong person, or hurt someone because they looked at him wrong.

But Yuuri trusted him, and Phichit refused to let his Captain down.

The rival Captain may want something, but Phichit would fight to defend it. Yuuri’s orders were clear. He should keep the boy safe from harm and away from Captain JJ – a man of wit and charisma. It shouldn’t be hard, but Phichit was determined to do all he could to prove his worth.

It may be hard, and a treacherous fight could occur, but Phichit would do his best.

“So, what did the Captain say?”

And Phichit turned, eyes on a man more deserving of his position.

“Seung-Gil,” Phichit spoke, letting out a heavy breath as he stepped forward. “I didn’t think you cared much for what the Captain says?”

“I don’t, but with a rival like him across the way, I’m curious.”

He turned back to the ship, fearful for its intentions. He wouldn’t blame them for their curiosity. He hadn’t told them much when he returned, and perhaps he should have, but there wasn’t a lot Phichit  _ could _ say. The rival’s intentions remained unknown, and Phichit didn’t have an answer.

“I reckon he wants the boy,” Seung-Gil then claimed, crossing his arms. “I don’t see any other reason why JJ would arrive. We don’t have much, so I hope the Captain is at least aware of that when you tell me exactly what he said.”

“He knows.” Phichit sighed, nodding. “If JJ doesn’t ask for the kid, we'll simply make a deal. But if he does, we don’t give him up. That’s strict orders from the Captain.”

“Hm, a bold choice.”

He raised a brow. “You think?”

“Well, think about it. Do you really think that boy is worth anything to us right now?” Seung-Gil asked, but Phichit didn’t intend to respond. “It seems like their plan is going well over there. They’ve not yet been caught, and some of the loot you’ve returned is rather valuable. It seems pointless keeping the kid hostage when we’re not using him. He’s just been an extra mouth to feed.”

Usually, he would’ve agreed. It sounded like a suggestion to kill and Phichit would take any opportunity to murder, but Yuuri’s orders were clear. He shouldn’t hurt the boy and he shouldn’t give him up. That was the demand.

But even if it wasn’t, just the thought of betraying his Captain’s word didn’t sit well in his chest.

“It’s Captain’s orders, Seung-Gil.”

“But didn’t the Captain say you’re our Captain for now?” he asked and Phichit looked at him blankly, face void of any expression. “You get to make the decisions now. Am I wrong?”

He was wrong.

Yuuri’s orders were clear. Phichit was Captain while he was away, and he shouldn’t harm the boy. His responsibility was only temporary. It didn’t mean his decisions now outweighed the Captain’s, but even if they did, he wouldn’t kill the boy if he had the chance. He never thought he’d see the day, but it was true. His information was valuable and useful.

And he might not admit it, but the Kid was beginning to grow on him.

“He’s not worth much, especially while their plan seems to be working, but his information is useful,” Phichit explained. “He’s helped the Captain be cautious, and wary of certain individuals. We may not need to use him, and we might not ever need to, but even so, the Captain’s orders are clear. We do not harm him, and we don’t trade him away.”

“I suppose you’re right,” Seung-Gil agreed, moving forward to stand beside Phichit looking across the ocean. “I just hope that whatever it is JJ wants, it’s a simple demand that doesn’t require a fight.”

“I sometimes think JJ is more bloodthirsty than I am.” Phichit chuckled, shaking his head.

“We both know that’s an understatement. I’ve seen you wipe out a group of men just by your rage alone, and they were all armed too. JJ can only dream, but he knows how to use his words. You think you can handle that?”

“I can only try.” Phichit sighed. “I think we should prepare. We need everyone armed and masked before he arrives. The Captain would kill me if he finds we’ve let our guard down and shown our faces to the enemy.”

“As you wish,” Seung-Gil nodded, turning to call Phichit’s demands to the crew behind him.

And Phichit watched the crew scurry around to prepare. They were quick to follow his orders, ready without hesitation and Phichit smiled brightly. If this was what it meant to be Captain – to be listened to and appreciated – he could get used to this.

* * *

 

 

It was with a terrified gasp that Victor awoke.

He lay in bed, eyes wide as he stared towards the darkness, heart pounding and trembling, but his body wouldn’t move. He was paralyzed until his toes wiggled, and tight fingers gripped the bed sheets, shaking and clammy as he pushed himself to sit upright.

His hand scrubbed over his face. The nightmare was more of a night terror, but it was still always the same; paralyzed and wet and cold, unable to scream for help. It was all he could remember. There was no picture in his mind, but it was enough to quake terror through his bones, that crippling fear which turned him into a petrified mess.

And Victor turned, hand reaching for his husband, only to find his side of the bed empty.

He let out a groan in complaint. Yuuri was supposed to be there to kiss away the vague memories and offer all his support, but he wasn’t. He was somewhere in the castle, possibly, walking off a nightmare of his own.

The dream was a recurring one. It was a nightmare that hit the hardest, forcing Victor to wake in a cold sweat with his husband whispering soft words in his ear, revealing only a softness only Victor ever saw, but Yuuri wasn’t here. He had no husband to hush the violent words in his mind, unidentifiable, but still loud and brash and unable to shut up.

Yuuri had always been good at distracting Victor’s reckless thoughts, but without him, he didn’t know what to do. It was too silent, and loneliness ate away at his soul.

It wasn’t often he was alone, but at a time like this, he found no reason to enjoy it.

But when a wet nose touched his hand and Victor looked down to find Makkachin whimpering softly, he realised he wasn’t as alone as he assumed. She wasn’t quite the same support as Yuuri, but she was soft and warm and Victor pressed his face into her now-clean fur, holding her close as he breathed.

“It was just a nightmare,” Victor explained as if she would understand. “I get them sometimes. Yuuri does too. We’re scarred men hurt from a lifetime sailing the seas, but we have each other for support, and now we have you, Makka.”

The companion licked his face like a response – an agreement, and Victor smiled. His insides burned warmly, comforted by a dog who didn’t know what she had done for him, and Victor reminded himself to give her extra food in the morning.

His heart may still ache, and his fingers tremble just that little bit longer, but he felt better – so, so much better.

“Hey, Makka,” Victor said, watching the dog perk up and tilt her head at his question. “Do you think you can guide me to Yuuri?”

Makkachin barked as she pounced off the bed, and Victor laughed as she impatiently spun in circles waiting for him to follow. And he did, eventually, after quickly dressing himself so he wouldn’t be walking around naked.

He didn’t entirely trust that she understood him. She wasn’t trained yet, but she reacted to something and that was good enough. And if they didn’t find Yuuri, Victor was fine with that. The walk was welcomed, even when he began to suspect Makkachin was guiding him down the same hallways and rooms they’ve been through before, he still followed.

His memory may be weak, but he was smart enough to recognise little things. He noticed the same painting in the gold frame three times, and the candelabra Yuuri broke on their first day, its candle still kicked under the chair. It was like Makkachin was helping him remember.

And although he pondered turning back to return to his room, Victor continued to follow. She was a nice distraction from the nightmares still plaguing him.

“Victor?”

The voice startled him. His brain stuttered, every part of him pausing while his thoughts caught up and took in the figure standing by a doorway.

It was Zakhar – the King, still dressed in his daily wear and smiling warmly at him.

The man hadn’t slept himself and that had Victor thinking, but the thought didn’t last long. A frightful shiver raced up his spine, cold and cautious, hesitant of his appearance for a reason Victor couldn’t understand.

“What are you doing up so late?” the King then asked, taking a step forward as Victor considered stepping back.

He reached for Makkachin, her company a quick reminder that he wasn’t alone. He was still so cautious, afraid of even the shadows, but brushing a hand through her fur eased the torment in his heart. It relaxed his mind as he exhaled a long breath.

“I just… had a nightmare. That’s all.”

The King’s smile held sympathy. It was supposed to help Victor feel better but instead, when the man gripped his shoulder, it didn’t lessen the feeling. It magnified it. He trembled in his bones, desperate to pull away from a grip that was supposed to be supportive, but he stayed frozen. Terrified.

He didn’t understand the reaction. Perhaps it was the touch, or that his paranoid mind exaggerated the concern; whichever it was, Victor didn’t like it.

“I have them myself sometimes,” Zakhar said, as if he understood Victor’s torment. “But no matter. Come on, let’s go have a drink.”

Victor didn’t have a say in the matter as he was guided away by a hand that was far too gentle. He checked for Makkachin. She was still following, to his relief, by Victor’s feet as they moved into a new room.

He wasn’t sure how they missed this room before - unless they  _ had _ found it and Victor was just being forgetful, but it was large enough to remember. There sat a large desk near the window, one similar to Yuuri’s own except with less knife marks carved into the wood. There was a chair too, big and expensive and far too comfortable to be owned by anyone but the King.

And when the King sat down, Victor realised this must be Zakhar’s own personal room. 

“Sit, Victor,” Zakhar gestured to a chair as Victor awkwardly stood to the side, watching the man pour a glass of wine. “I’d rather you get comfortable than stand around all night.”

Victor didn’t move just yet. He looked back, catching Makkachin sniffing around the room before deciding to sit.

He cleared his throat. He didn’t know what to say, but it didn’t seem words were needed as the King passed Victor a glass of wine. He took it, preferring to have something in hand to play with. It was better than picking at his own nails.

“You know, Victor,” Zakhar suddenly spoke, and Victor watched as he poured himself a glass. “I always hated nightmares. They’re just our imaginations. It’s a weakness us humans are cursed with, our minds turning against us rather than evolving with us, and it’s pathetic, really, that we let such things take control.”

“I suppose that’s what trauma does to a man,” Victor replied with a deep breath. “We relive our pasts, remind ourselves of our mistakes and fears so we can learn from them. It’s not always easy, but that’s what makes us human, does it not?”

The King didn’t react at first. He stared at Victor, drink held by his lips before he smiled and took a sip, swallowing the deep red substance. Victor had no interest in going the same. He didn’t like wine. He preferred rum, but given the circumstances, any alcoholic beverage was welcomed as he too took a sip from his own drink.

“You have a very interesting way of viewing life, Victor,” Zakhar commented, and all Victor did was swallow another mouthful. “I can’t say I agree, but what father and son are the same?”

It was still so strange hearing this man call him his son. Victor accepted the relation. The King was his father and there was nothing he could do to change that, and he was fine with it. It was just an unfamiliar word, and Victor bit his tongue and smiled through fake teeth.

“I suppose so,” he replied, taking a forceful sip of the bitter wine burning his throat.

“But forgive me for asking; I’m not sure how a traveller can have such traumas that it causes nightmares,” Zakhar commented. “Would you care to talk about it?”

He should be insulted, but Victor  _ was _ living under a façade. What the King didn’t know wouldn’t hurt him, and he intended for it to stay that way.

“I don’t think I can.”

The King appeared doubtful, and curious, but Victor couldn’t. Even if he did remember his nightmares, he wouldn’t spill them to a man like the King. They were for Yuuri’s ears only; the deep explanation and frightful feeling that were Yuuri’s to ease and soothe for him.

And Victor’s silence seemed to give the King a hint.

“You know, for a man who sees nightmares as a weakness, I have them too,” Zakhar then said, leaning back in his chair. “But do you know how I stop them?”

“How?”

“I approach the issue creating them,” he stated. “I destroy what caused it because doing so tells me that I’m the one in control, and I’m in charge – not my nightmares, or my memories, but myself taking back what’s rightfully mine. I stop them, and it’s as simple as that.”

Victor stared, taken back by the reaction. It was forceful, and determined, and a part of Victor wished to smile. It was commendable, he must admit. He never thought of doing such things himself, but Victor would rather talk it out with his husband than do something that could make it worse.

But it wasn’t like he could take the King's advice. His nightmares were a blur, a confusing mess of fear and doubt. It wasn’t that simple.

“You almost sound just like my Yuuri. He likes control too.” Victor grinned, thinking of his husband. “But it wouldn’t matter. My nightmares are a little more difficult than that.”

“How so?”

“Because I don’t remember them.”

The King paused; his stare unreadable as he put aside his glass of wine. Victor anticipated the response but he feared it too, regretting delving into the mind that was his father. He had a way of thinking. It didn’t appeal to Victor, but he got this far. He might as well delve further.

“That shouldn’t stop you from taking control,” Zakhar replied, brows hung low. “It might seem hard, but the only one with the power to stop your nightmares is you. So, which one is it? Is it the scar on your forehead or the one on your neck?”

Victor’s breath hitched as he quickly brushed his fringe over the wound. “I didn’t think you noticed.”

“I’m a very observant man. I see everything, Victor,” he replied. Victor swallowed back the lump in his throat, ignoring the growing paranoia. “But tell me, how can you ever find a way to stop your nightmares when you only have your own opinion on them, and I assume your husband's too?”

“Because Yuuri supports me,” he stated, firmly and true. “That’s enough.”

“But can he stop them?”

Victor would have said no because the reality was that Yuuri couldn’t stop them – and neither could he – but he suspected that would’ve encouraged the King’s lecture once again. He didn’t feel like listening to it.

But he did think about what was told. It was the way the King explained the differing opinions and he wasn’t wrong. Yuuri was the only person who knew Victor’s nightmares. He told Yuuri how they made him feel, his reactions, right down to the finer detail, and as Victor looked into the King’s educated eyes, he wondered if he was right.

He recalled Yuuri’s warnings, but only briefly. What wrong could come from Victor telling the King a nightmare even he didn’t understand?

“I don’t remember them anyway, so even if I did want to tell you, I couldn’t,” Victor explained, eyes cast to the ground. “But I do know some things. I’ve gone a long time not knowing what the nightmare was about, but I think I figured it out.”

“Was it the person who caused it?”

“No,” he shook his head, closing his eyes as he breathed deeply, “it’s the ocean.”

He watched the King’s brow raise as he asked, “The ocean?”

Victor nodded. “I was found there with a head injury and amnesia, so it feels appropriate that I’d have nightmares about it. I don’t see anything, but I feel this sense of helplessness and terror. That’s all I know. It’s like I’m trying to resurrect a memory, but all I can recall was how I felt. I just can’t remember anything else.”

“I suppose that does make it hard to control,” Zakhar pondered, taking a sip from his drink. “We couldn’t find anything when you disappeared. There was no ship, no bodies, nothing to recover. All the evidence is buried under the ocean, hidden deep within its depths.”

Victor blinked. “So, what you’re saying is there’s no way for me to stop this fear?”

“Well, I never said that.” Zakhar chuckled as he stood, turning his back to Victor as he gazed beyond the window instead, looking down at the Kingdom below. “I told you to face the issues creating them. If it’s the ocean that you fear, perhaps you and your husband should venture the seas for a little while?”

Victor wanted to laugh. They already travelled the ocean for years and it never stopped the nightmares, but he wasn’t  _ afraid _ of the open water. It was how he ended up there. It was waking up to strangers staring back at him with nothing but a first name to remember.  _ That’s _ what terrified Victor.

And while he told the King more than he intended, he didn’t wish to explain it all. There were certain vulnerabilities he preferred to keep to himself.

“That sounds tempting,” Victor agreed, “but I haven’t been here long. I’m sure you’d prefer to have me stay a while for longer and get to know my family a little more. It’s been some time, hasn’t it?”

When Victor noticed the King’s pause, dread filled his bones – sudden and quick, and he didn’t understand why.

“I guess you’re right,” Zakhar smiled as he turned, as if his reaction hadn’t sent Victor into a frenzied panic. “And now that I’ve thought about it, I suppose there’s a benefit in your memory loss.”

Victor’s brows dropped. “How so?”

“It can protect you,” he replied as he moved, returning back to his seat. “You may remember how it feels, but you don’t remember how it happened, and there’s bliss in absent-minded ignorance. You never know what information you may hold. And sometimes, not remembering is for the better.”

He wasn’t sure what to say. He couldn’t recall a moment where his amnesia protected him. If anything, it was mostly a burden, but Victor was content. There was no loss in knowing a past he couldn’t remember, and he didn’t always have an interest in finding the answers.

And besides, from the moment he woke up Yuuri was in his life. That was better than anything else in the world. Why would he need to remember everything else?

“If it protects the people I love, I don’t care if I don’t ever remember.” Victor shrugged as he moved to stand, whistling Makkachin over. “But for now, I would like to try to sleep again.”

The King chuckled as he stood too. “I hope you sleep well, Victor.”

He yawned loudly, exhaustion catching up to him as he turned to leave. He wasn’t sure what time it was, but it didn’t matter. He just hoped Yuuri would be back in their room so he could make up for all the kisses he owed Victor, and that encouraged his feet to move quicker as he reached the doorway leading back to the hallway.

“Oh, Victor!” Zakhar called, and Victor paused, turning to meet the man’s stare. “Just think about what I said. And if you remember anything, even the smallest detail, you know you can always talk to me about it.”

The King was smiling, but it was unsettling, striking Victor’s chest with unease. He swallowed back the feeling as he nodded, and moved to leave the room without saying another word. He just wanted to leave.

And it wasn’t until the door fully closed behind him that he finally let out a breath.

The air inside was so thick. He hadn’t realized, and Victor scrubbed a hand over is face, but it didn’t matter anymore. He rushed back to their room, wanting nothing more than to be with Yuuri – wherever he was – and get those kisses he was owed.

A kiss sounded nice, and maybe having sex too, but a kiss Victor desired the most.

 

* * *

 

 

_ It had been two weeks since Victor was wounded by Yuuri’s mistake. Which also meant two weeks since Victor delved into his heart and took it as his own. _

_ And Yuuri gladly allowed him to. He wore his heart on his sleeve for Victor. He didn’t hide it around him, not anymore, but he certainly paid close attention to his words when he was around other crewmen. He kept them rough, demanding, speaking to Victor in a way he would the others, but wished he didn’t have to. _

_ Yuuri was reckless around Victor, but cautious around the crew; it was only inevitable that eventually, somebody would find out. He only wished it wasn’t his father who had. _

_ He hadn’t meant to get so aggressive towards him, but Victor meant too much for him to allow his father to kill him. Even when he was testing Yuuri, he refused it. His father’s words struck a nerve. Yuuri had no control when he reacted, and no way to stop his words when he threatened the man, revealing more than he ever intended. _

_ And he knew his father was enjoying it. He wasn’t proud of Yuuri. Nor did he allow it, so Yuuri assumed. He would happily use it to train Yuuri to be the Captain he’s destined to be, and he wasn’t sure which was worse – that the manipulation could include Victor, or that his father found his breaking point. _

_ They were both equally as bad, but Yuuri would rather take his father’s hurtful words than see Victor be used as a pawn. _

_ But still, it had been two weeks since Victor was injured and Yuuri visited him every chance he had. He fed him food, kept him comfortable, even changed his bandages for him when the crewman who was supposed to care for him neglected to do so for a day. _

_ He was getting better, which was amazing. But he was days closer to going back to work, and Yuuri feared his father’s next step in teaching Yuuri how to be a Captain. _

_ “I’m so glad I have you to care for me, Yuuri,” Victor said one evening when they were alone, the crew having docked at a harbour and enjoying their time on land for a while. Yuuri’s favourite kind of nights. “I think if you weren’t here, this would’ve been infected by now.” _

_ Yuuri’s heart burned pleasantly before it ached, hurting at Victor’s own words because he knew they were true. And that wasn’t fair. _

_ “I just don’t want to see you get hurt,” Yuuri told him as he took his hand, intertwining his fingers with Victor’s as he smiled meekly. “And I suppose this is me trying to give back for what I did. If I had just stayed focused…” _

_ “Yuuri, let’s not talk about that now,” Victor told him. “There’s something else I want to talk about – well, ask, even.” _

_ “Oh?” _

_ Victor cleared his throat, looking a little nervous. “When I was out cold from this wound, there were still some things I could remember, like the pain and the blood, but I also remember certain things that were said, and the voices they belonged to.” _

_ Yuuri’s heart set aflame. “You… do?” _

_ Victor looked at him like he knew all of Yuuri’s truths – his deepest thoughts and dirtiest secrets. _

_ “Did you really mean that when you said I was the only person you cared about?” _

_ Yuuri’s cheeks painted pink, burning brightly as he turned away. “I mean… why wouldn’t I?” _

_ There’s a pause, one that sent Yuuri’s mind swirling. He was almost too afraid to look back. He wouldn’t know what to do if he turned to find Victor laughing at him, but he didn’t hear any chuckling. He could hardly hear Victor at all, and when he finally looked, cheeks burning less and heart slightly soothed, he found Victor just… looking at him. _

_ There was nothing to his face. He hardly showed a single emotion, and Yuuri wasn’t sure what to think. _

_ “Yuuri,” Victor sighed, eyes closed, “how long are we doing to dance around this?” _

_ He meant their blossoming relationship. He meant all those looks to one another, the sly glances when they would bend over to grab something or lingering stares that lasted longer than anticipated. He meant every single moment they shared where their hearts skipped and their cheeks blushed, and uttered words that are too soft for pirates to use. _

_ And Yuuri, for all he wished to admit, wasn’t entirely sure what to say in response. They had been dancing around the truth for a while, but there was a reason. He wasn’t quite ready to admit the truth just yet – only he wasn’t sure when he’d ever be ready. _

_ But now was better than never, he supposed. _

_ “It’s just a lot to admit,” Yuuri said, shrugging. “It’s not exactly appropriate either, is it?” _

_ “But is anything we do appropriate?” _

_ “I don’t mean it like that,” he corrected, sighing a little before brushing a nervous hand through his hair. “I mean… like when people say we’re like brothers.” _

_ Victor openly gagged, loud and violently. _

_ “I’ve never seen you like a brother. In fact, I don’t think I’ve ever looked at you like you were a friend,” he exclaimed, repulsed that people would even suggest they were like brothers. And Yuuri would’ve agreed if he wasn’t panicking over the way Victor said he never saw him like a friend. _

_ “Then what do you see me as?” _

_ Yuuri was already blushing before Victor had even answered. _

_ “I’ve always seen you as a potential lover.” _

_ And again, Yuuri wasn’t sure what to say. He too had felt the same somewhere along the line, that he knew his future would be with Victor, as lovers, a pirate couple invading the seven seas. It was a heavy thought to accept, back when he realized, but now he pondered if he also always felt that way. _

_ He could say, once, that he must’ve seen Victor as a friend, but his first assumption when they met was that Victor must be a mermaid – or a siren. That didn’t say friendship. Nor did it say anything was platonic. _

_ “We’re certainly a pair, aren’t we?” Yuuri agreed, laughing lightly. “We feel this way towards each other and we know it, yet we still have yet to say it. Even now as we talk about it, we’re still dancing around the words.” _

_ “And those words are?” _

_ Yuuri swallowed thickly, nerves eating away at his heart. _

_ “That I like you.” _

_ “Just ‘like?’” Victor asked, smiling so brightly and beautifully. “I would’ve thought after how long you’ve been looking at me like you want to take me there and then, the feeling would have been more than just ‘like’, by now?” _

_ Yuuri’s cheeks burned again, but completely out of embarrassment. He thought those kinds of looks were hidden. He couldn’t recall a moment where he watched Victor, mind wandered to those certain private thoughts, and was caught. _

_ But still, the truth would have come out eventually. Now was, again, better than never. _

_ “I wish you didn’t say that kind of stuff so easily,” Yuuri said, exhaling a deep breath that jumped with a single laugh. “But this… dancing. It’s been kind of fun, don’t you think?” _

_ Victor hummed with agreement. _

_ “All this wondering, daydreaming, and those secret gazes that we both think neither can see but we can. They’ve been fun, and keeping it a secret from the crew just adds to the challenge, minus your father knowing how you feel.” _

_ “Let’s just pretend he doesn’t exist. That sounds nice.” _

_ “I couldn’t agree more,” Victor nodded, “but I do wonder how long it will take until one of us breaks. We’ve been at this for a while now, and I must admit, I’m growing impatient. One of us will have to make the first move eventually, and I don’t plan for it to be me.” _

_ Yuuri raised a brow, lip twisted into a lopsided grin as he asked, “is that a challenge?” _

_ “Only if you see it as one.” _

_ He wasn’t entirely certain what game Victor was playing. If this meant truly waiting until one of them couldn’t take the teasing anymore, or that this was Victor telling him to hurry up and make the first move, Yuuri enjoyed the sound of it. Either one, he liked. _

_ But as reckless as Yuuri was, there were certain things he liked to take his time with. It wasn’t often he wished to cherish his time and patience, but Victor being the first to break was pleasing to him. He liked the idea of winning this challenge, and teasing Victor when he loses. _

_ He anticipated their future. He couldn’t wait, and Yuuri smiled as he nodded. _

_ “Just to let you know, I don’t plan to lose.” _

_ Victor laughed, bright and joyful. “I anticipate how this turns out.” _

_ “As do I.” _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Me: Oh yeah Victor has nightmares too time to hurt
> 
> But the King... Zakhar....... hmm, I wonder his intentions. Or am I still playing ya'll? HhhMHmmmHHH ;)
> 
> Also can we just talk about those two in the flashback scene, and how awful they are at teasing one another. BOYS. They're reckless pirates and they just want to have some fun, but plEASe.  
> (I didn't even plan that to happen but I'm glad it did, because at least they spoke about their feelings... even if they're intentionally not acting out on them for the sake of teasing one another djghdbfjgb)  
> I bet ya'll are glad I'm not writing them getting together because hell, that would've killed me too
> 
> I'm iffy about this chapter, and the whole JJ situation has me s t r e s s e d (but its ok I know what to do with it) but I hope you all liked it! Comments are super appreciated so don't be afraid to yell at me about even the stupidest things, like Yuuri not actually being present in this chapter besides the flashback XD
> 
> <3 <3
> 
> EDIT: I ALMOST FORGOT I DREW SOME ART:  
> [Check it out here!](https://axlaida.tumblr.com/post/186357414389/oh-hick-pirate-boys-i-also-hate-clothes-based-on)  
> 


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Love you izzy <3
> 
> I'm also on hiatus with this fic. Reason at the end. Sorry.

There was something about feeling vulnerable that had Yuuri frustrated.

He never liked the feeling. It was restrictive and troublesome, a mental block that turned him into that scared little child he was when he first sailed the seas with his father. But he was a Katsuki, born into a family of strong men and women. He was supposed to be tougher than this,  _ braver _ , but he couldn’t help it.

Somewhere out there, JJ was planning something sinister, and Yuuri should be there with his crew when it happens.

He wondered what his father would say if he saw Yuuri right now, stood alone on the rooftop of a castle, watching the ocean from afar. It wouldn’t be possible. He was dead, sunk under the ocean’s depths alongside his ship and crew. Seung-Gil believed his father’s spirit walked the Earth. Victor said he was buried deep underground in an eternal slumber, soul trapped in between life and death. Yuuri just didn’t know which his father deserved – a peaceful sleep, or eternal walking.

The thought never lingered. It was a short distraction before the vulnerability came storming back into his heart, making him weak and helpless and completely unable to stop all the bad that could happen while he was away.

Vulnerability was a weakness, and Yuuri hated that the most.

“I thought I’d find you up here.”

Yuuri turned, thumb still in his mouth from where he was biting his nails as he stared at his husband smiling at him. He froze for a moment, embarrassed, then crossed his arms he returned a weaker grin. It was hard to show happiness when his nerves tugged knots in his gut, but he tried.

“I’m surprised by that, actually,” Yuuri replied. “I came up here with the intention of you not finding me.”

If Victor was hurt by that, he didn’t show it. Yuuri’s words felt harsh even to himself, but they were true. He wanted to be alone for a while, think a little, and ease his soul without needing to bother his husband for help. It was why he was up here in the first place.

“I can leave if you want to be alone?” Victor asked, taking a step back.

“No, no. It’s fine.”

He may want to be alone, but seeing Victor changed his mind. He was his husband. He was supposed to listen to Yuuri’s woes, no matter how silly or serious they were. But while he asked Victor to be with him, he still didn’t wish to talk.

He turned back to the ocean when a pair of warm arms wrapped around his waist. A firm chest pressed against his back, holding Yuuri in a tight embrace that soothed his heart and eased his mind. The worries remained. They ate away at his brain, reckless and hungry, but Victor’s gentle kisses along his neck helped calm those too. Not completely, but they helped.

“It was lonely waking up without you.”

“Sorry,” Yuuri muttered, exhaling a breath. “I couldn’t sleep.”

Victor hummed. “Me neither. I had a nightmare, but I’m alright.”

Yuuri wasn’t sure if he should believe him. Victor didn’t always like to admit his sorrows. His nightmares were tough, sometimes recurring, but his fingers didn’t shake and he didn’t appear to be afraid. He was usually worse than this, so Yuuri decided to trust his word – for now.

“If you say so.”

And then a silence fell between them as they watched the Kingdom below. The lights were dim this time of night, but still bright enough to help Yuuri see the gentle waves of the ocean in the distance. It seemed so silent – so  _ still _ , but years of sailing the seas proved otherwise. The ocean was violent, but peaceful. It was loud, but sometimes so very still. It was the most deceiving part of this Earth, yet Yuuri trusted its depth.

Perhaps he shouldn’t, but his time inland did nothing to reassure him this was safer.

“You cut your hair,” Victor then commented, his breath against Yuuri’s neck as a hand reached up to brush through his shortened locks. “When did you do that?”

“Earlier,” Yuuri admitted. “It was getting long.”

“I quite liked it long,” he replied, the smile in his voice audible. “It gave you this windswept look. It was very sexy, like those men I read in my books where they arrive on a horse, chest exposed and their long hair flowing in the wind, taking the lovestruck reader away to have a long and sensual night of soft lovemaking.”

Yuuri’s brows dropped, pulling a face as he turned in the embrace. He nearly didn’t ask after seeing Victor’s wide grin, expecting it to be some sort of a joke, but he never broke into a laugh, and Yuuri wondered how long Victor imagined him in that setting. Or  _ when _ seemed to be an appropriate question.

But instead, Yuuri settled with asking, “Is that what happens in those books you like to read?”

“No, but a man can daydream about his husband, can’t he?”

Yuuri chewed his lip, refusing to give Victor the satisfaction but failed when his laugh broke free. It wasn’t funny. It was so stupid because imagining himself like that was unamusing, but something about Victor over-romanticising him in that way was just like him. That was his husband, and Yuuri laughed cheerily.

And just like that – by a stupid joke from Victor – Yuuri’s nerves settled into something less troublesome.

“You’re an idiot, you know that?” He chuckled, grinning lovingly. Victor just smiled, proud of himself because he would be, and Yuuri just had to tell him now. “I was nervous before that, you know.”

“Yeah, I knew,” Victor nodded, smiling at Yuuri’s shocked expression. “I know you like to be alone sometimes, but with what’s-his-face lurking around, I figured you wouldn’t be completely okay. Do you want to talk about it?”

He thought about shrugging it off, but that would do him no favours.

“It’s… JJ,” Yuuri began, unsure how else to continue. “But it’s also Phichit. And my crew. I’m worried about how things will turn out because I know Phichit won’t come to me straight away if there’s a problem. He’s too proud to do that, so I fear he won’t tell me till it’s too late, or we lose some men. I should be there to help them. I’m their Captain, but I don’t dare leave you behind.”

Victor didn’t speak immediately, but the way his arms tightened around Yuuri spoke for themselves.

“You’re so selfless sometimes,” Victor commented, bringing his hand up to cup Yuuri’s cheek. “But trust your men, Yuuri. We never became the most feared pirates to sail the seven seas for nothing. JJ is a fool for thinking he can fight us. You know this.”

“That’s if he tries to.” Yuuri sighed, turning back to the ocean. “He has plenty of gold on him. I fear he’ll give Phichit a high enough bargain, and I know Phichit will think about taking it. But if he doesn’t, and he follows my orders, he won’t hesitate to fight either.”

Victor was quiet, gaze searching through Yuuri’s eyes as if to find a solution to his words – an answer that would satisfy him. It was a lost cause. Yuuri didn’t even know how to help himself, but he appreciated Victor trying hard to find a way.

“You can go back, if you want.”

And he didn’t hesitate as he shook his head. “I’m not leaving you.”

“I can take care of myself, Yuuri,” Victor defended, as if that would be enough to change Yuuri’s mind – but it wasn’t. “I know you prefer to keep an eye on me, and I get that. I do the same to you, but I think your ship needs their Captain more than I need my husband’s protection.”

“But the King…!”

“The King won’t hurt me,” Victor reassured him, cradling his face and smiling softly. “I know you don’t trust him, but I can defend myself too. You don’t always need to be there for everyone. You’re only one man, Yuuri, but whatever you choose, you’ll have to stick with. Do you understand?”

“I don’t just distrust him, Victor. He’s a manipulative swine who’s up to something. I can tell.” Yuuri scowled. Just thinking of the man rang alarm bells in his mind, but he exhaled a breath, reminding himself to think straight. “But you’re right. I should believe in you more.”

“Just because you want to protect me doesn’t mean you don’t believe in me,” Victor said as Yuuri looked up, swallowing thickly. “And wanting to return to your men doesn’t mean you don’t believe Phichit can handle it. You’re an overthinker and you always have been. I know your heart worries for them, but your mind is scared of the outcome, and you’ll blame yourself if something goes wrong.”

Yuuri frowned; even as his heart raced with a burning warmth, he couldn’t find it in himself to smile. “I don’t like how well you can read me sometimes,” he spoke, voice breaking. “I’m more than just scared. I feel so… overwhelmed with everything going on. I don’t know where to begin.”

Victor wrapped his arms around Yuuri again, pulling him in for an embrace he didn’t let go. But Yuuri didn’t want him to. He stayed in his husband’s arms, face buried in his neck as he breathed in his familiar scent – the smell of sea water, florals, and something soapy that was a little too unfamiliar. It was Victor’s scent. It was familiar, and sweet, and reminded him of home.

“Have you decided what you want to do?”

And as Yuuri took another breath, he nodded. “If Phichit’s in trouble, he knows where I am.”

“This means you’re staying?”

Yuuri pulled back, meeting Victor’s stare as he gave a confident nod.

“Yes, I’m staying.”

 

* * *

Phichit never planned to ask the kid anything, but things didn’t always go as he expected.

There were multiple examples he could think up on the spot. There was his unstoppable rage, which, surprisingly, he kept control of. Where he expected the rival Captain to make an appearance already, he hadn’t, and Phichit’s nerves did nothing to help ease his aching chest. He also never expected himself to quite like the kid who was their captive.

But like Phichit realized, things didn’t always go as expected.

He didn’t think much of the boy. He didn’t care about his past, or his aspirations. He hardly wished to know when his birthday was, but he found himself quite enjoying his time with the kid when he visited him, as short as the visits may have been.

He didn’t act like such a brat anymore. He appreciated the food Phichit gave him, and the freedom he was so rarely given. There were times they even had full conversations where nobody called anyone ‘scum’, or insulted the other's upbringing. There was peace. There was an understanding.

Which made things confusing, because the gut-wrenching feeling that ached at the thought of JJ arriving to take the kid was something Phichit couldn’t explain.

He didn’t care about the kid. He didn’t.

“Are you just going to stare at me or are you going to give me my food?”

But as he snapped back into reality, the kid’s food in hand with him impatiently waiting, Phichit wondered how long he would keep refusing what might just be true.

“Can I ask you something?”

The kid looked from the food to the quartermaster. “Would you still ask me if I said no?”

“Perhaps.” Phichit rolled his eyes, smiling a small grin before pushing the plate of food beneath the cell’s bars, finally passing it to the kid. He watched as he ate and sat down as he asked, “Do you know anyone by the name of Jean-Jacques Leroy, or JJ for short?”

The kid paused, thinking. He anticipated a nod. His heart begged for it, skipping in his chest before the kid shook his head, denying Phichit’s question and completely unaware of the way it made his heart sink. He shouldn’t be so surprised. It was a stretch expecting him to know, but it was worth asking for the sake of relief.

“I’m going to assume he’s another pirate,” the kid guessed, shovelling food into his mouth and swallowing it down before asking, “Is he somebody I should be concerned about?”

“Possibly,” Phichit admitted. He saw no reason to keep it a secret. If it involved the kid, he’d rather him know. “There’s another ship nearby, a rival pirate Captain. We don’t know what he wants, but there’s a chance he might be here for you.”

“Me?” the kid asked through a mouthful of food, face quickly twisting into a scowl as he swallowed again. “Your own Captain has been neglectful of my ‘use’. What the hell would another pirate want with me?”

“We don’t know, but there’s still a chance he might not know you’re here.”

He finished his food, pushing the plate towards Phichit before sitting back, arms crossed and looking frustrated as he asked, “So, what’s going to happen with me then?”

“Nothing, at the moment.” Phichit shrugged. “As I said, there’s still a chance he might not be here for you. We’ve traded resources before, but if he asks for you, I’ve been given strict orders by my Captain not to trade you away. And I don’t intend to let him come here and steal you, either. Not without a fight, at least.”

The kid chewed on his lip, thinking. “Captain JJ then?”

“You know him?”

“No, like I said before. But my father might’ve,” the kid pondered, pausing for a moment to think back; “he used to speak with a few pirates. He had this idea to help them, but he died before he could make a difference. He was also quite curious of your lifestyle. He always liked to research into things, so perhaps he met this Pirate at some point, but never mind him. This… JJ guy, what’s he like?”

Phichit snorted a laugh. There were many ways to describe Captain JJ, none of which he could say were positive characteristics. The kid had little patience with Yuuri and his own crew, he could only imagine how thin it would be with JJ’s – with the man himself.

“He’s… talkative,” Phichit began, only scratching the surface. “He’s a lot to deal with honestly, and he expects to always win, but we’re bigger than him. And better. And more skilled than his own men. He’s not a favourite of mine, but I think the feeling is mutual.”

The kid looked pleasantly surprised. “I didn’t think pirates hated one another.”

“You royals aren’t the only ones with corrupt leaders. We try hard not to make enemies, but given we’re the most fearsome ship to sail the seven seas, it's easy to make them.”

The kid didn’t say anything, but when he looked up, Phichit noticed a change in his eyes. There was less fury now. He didn’t glare at the quartermaster, but he didn’t dare suggest it was understanding. The kid despised him. That was a fact, but as he smirked delightfully at Phichit, almost as if his words were humorous and well-respected, Phichit wondered if he’d been reading the kid all wrong.

But any change to question was disturbed by a warning call. A shout outside demanded to disguise themselves and Phichit leapt to his feet, heart racing and fingers trembling as he adjusted the mask to cover his face.

“What’s that sound?” the kid asked.

“An enemy is coming,” Phichit replied, gripping his swords hilt as he turned. “And in this situation, it’s Captain JJ’s arrival.”

He paused before he left. He looked over his shoulder, giving the boy another look as he remembered Yuuri’s words. He repeated it in his head, reminding himself to not trade him away, to protect him. It was for the plan and for his own self-worth too.

“I don’t intend to let him get his hands on you,” Phichit declared. “You are under my protection, Yuri. And that’s a promise.”

He didn’t wait to see the kid react. He left, storming out onto the deck where he expected to see chaos. There was nothing simple about JJ. He liked to make an impression, but stepping out onto the deck, he was pleasantly surprised by the silence that followed.

It didn’t frighten him. Silence meant peace, but a shiver still raced up his spine.

There was no unfamiliar crew on board the ship, and no blood spilled. He would dare suggest they didn’t need their masks on, but there was a stranger amongst the crew, a man stood tall while threatened with multiple swords pointed his way. If it was a stranger, they would flee, but this was no ordinary man.

Phichit glared, scowling at Captain JJ stood on his Captain’s ship – alone, so he noticed, but still here, grinning at him.

“The quartermaster,” JJ spoke, voice low and intimidating, like he was trying to make Phichit quiver – but he feared no man like him. “I expected the Captain to make an appearance. It has been so long since we’ve spoken, but I see he’s not here.”

Phichit scowled. “Just get to it. I don’t have all day.”

JJ chuckled at Phichit’s impatience, and it was that kind of arrogance that really got to him. He almost forgot how much he despised this Captain. It was already tempting to strike a blade through his chest, but Yuuri warned him of his recklessness. He should be cautious, calculated, and calm.

But regardless, the thought was there as JJ stepped forward, unfazed by the blades and grinning wickedly.

“I hear you have royalty held hostage on this ship, and I’m here to make a deal.”

* * *

 

 

“I don’t see any reason why you should keep your mask on.”

Phichit ignored JJ with an eyeroll and kept his mask firmly over his face. The crew did the same, identities hidden from a man who was supposed to be their rival, yet stood here in his Captain’s quarters, arms crossed and smirk annoyingly bold on his face.

A deal, so JJ said. It was clearly about the kid, which had him nervously chew at his nails, but a deal wasn’t the worst. His intentions could have been sinister. There were a thousand ways this could have gone wrong, blood spilled and crewmen dead, and a deal was nothing compared to the carnage that could’ve been.

It only mattered how the deal concluded, but Phichit supposed he could handle it.

“I don’t trust you,” Phichit told him straight out, his head held high and glare strong. “You may be on my Captain’s ship, in his quarters making a deal with his quartermaster, but I won’t let my guard down. If you attempt to ambush us, I will not hesitate to strike you with my blade.”

“Your distrust in me is getting old,” JJ commented with the careless wave of his hand. It took a lot for Phichit not to already reach for his sword. “But I suppose I should get on with this. I’d like to make a deal, and I think my offer will be pleasing to you.”

“You better make it quick. I don’t intend to speak all day with the likes of a rival like you.”

JJ said nothing, but smiled as he revealed a large pouch from inside his coat. Phichit eyed it carefully, watching as the rival dropped it on his Captain’s desk, gold spilling out from the bag and sliding across the surface, the sound music to Phichit’s ears.

His eyes widened, mouth watered with a hungry greed. He was never always sure where JJ found his gold, but seeing it sat on his Captain’s desk was where it belonged. It was exactly what Yuuri needed. It was the reason why his Captain wasn’t present, and being so close to the key that would bring him home tempted Phichit to agree with the deal already.

But then the bag was taken away, returned to its spot inside JJ’s jacket as he smiled maliciously at the quartermaster.

“I see you’re interested now.” He grinned, stepping forward. “That could all be yours, but I need something in return.”

His mind snapped to the kid down below. “You want the boy.”

“I’m very interested in having him as my captive instead. I have been curious how your Captain managed to get a hold of someone like him, but I’m more interested in whether or not you agree with the offer.”

“A pouch of gold for the kid,” Phichit mused.

“Exactly.”

He shouldn’t agree to it. Yuuri’s words replayed in his mind, reminding Phichit of the trust and confidence Yuuri had in him to be his quartermaster. He couldn’t let his Captain down. Yuuri might never forgive him if he betrayed his word for some gold, but the deal was exactly what he needed. It would benefit his Captain so much.

He shouldn’t agree, but he wanted to, and the conflict was crushing him. He spun on his heel, turning his back on JJ to stare through the window and take a moment to breathe, watching the waves crash below. He made a promise. He told both Yuuri and the kid that he wouldn’t agree to any deal, no matter how tempting, but it was still so much gold… He’d be a fool to reject this.

And as he turned, catching JJ impatiently tap his foot, he finally had an answer.

“He’s not for sale,” Phichit spoke without thinking, his own words surprising him because he planned otherwise. He  _ wanted  _ to take the offer. “I-I was given strict orders by my Captain not to trade him. He’s  _ our _ captive, and no amount of gold will persuade me to go against my Captain’s orders.”

He wasn’t sure what happened, or exactly when he changed his mind, but denying JJ’s offer had relief sweep through him. He didn’t betray Yuuri’s trust. He kept his promise to the kid, and Phichit felt good about himself – a little annoyed, but good.

“Not even for two pouches of gold?” JJ then asked, giving Phichit a mental punch in the gut as he showed two bags instead, both filled with the alluring treasure. “I’m sure your Captain would want this, and it’s a very good deal. All I want is just one small child. Surely this is enough to change your mind?”

It was a stupidly good deal, and Phichit would be a fool if he refused. They traded before, priceless resources like sugar or gunpowder, but never had JJ made a deal like this. Never had he offered so much gold, and it could all be Phichit’s if he just let go of his stubborn pride.

“I’m sorry, but I refuse.”

But he still made a promise. He’d rather die than betray the man he owed his life to, no matter how tempting it was; Phichit couldn’t accept it.

“Very well.” JJ scowled, his voice like venom. “I should have known the Captain’s little pet wouldn’t betray him.”

If Phichit had any self-control left, he didn’t anymore. There was a blur, his vision blocked by a fiery rage that made him shout and punch his fist against the desk, ultimately losing control as he stormed forward. JJ didn’t flinch. He hardly reached as Phichit pressed his blade against his neck, but smiled, as if his rage was  _ entertaining _ .

“Who the hell are you calling a pet!” he shouted, pressing the blade closer. “Call me that again, and it’ll be your head I return to your crew.”

“Oh, how  _ threatening _ ,” JJ mocked and tightly grabbed Phichit’s wrist, pulling his arm away from his neck. “But I’m not done yet, so calm down and let’s talk.”

But he didn’t  _ want _ to. He needed to let out his wrath and exhale a breath of rage, but he allowed JJ to move his arm away, granting him freedom as Phichit stepped back. He turned away, striding across the room to distance himself between the rival Captain. He feared doing something stupid.

A part of him wished to end this now. He could do it, but to kill the Captain would take that away from his own. Phichit would rather let Yuuri have the privilege – the  _ honour _ . He deserved it, after all.

“I know you don’t trust me,” the rival began, taking slow steps forward. “But I do mean what I say when the kid is worth something more to us. There’s a lot I would do to have him as my captive. From one pirate to another, surely you must understand that.”

Phichit narrowed his eyes. “What does a man like you want with a kid like him?”

“The same as your Captain,” JJ answered. “I want wealth.”

“You seem to have enough of it already.”

“Perhaps, but just like your Captain, I want more.” JJ smirked, the thought of wealth pleasing to him. “He’s royalty. I can get so much from using him for a ransom. And you see, unlike your Captain, I know how to use a captive when I have one.”

“Who’s to say we haven’t used him?” Phichit asked with a low growl, attempting to hide that JJ was right. They hadn’t used him. Yet. “My Captain knows what he’s doing. But tell me, JJ. You asked me what it will take to have our captive, but what will it take to get you off this ship?”

“Your captive.”

Phichit smirked, huffing an amused laugh. “Then it seems we’re unable to proceed with this deal.”

“Oh, not completely,” JJ said, raising a finger as he stepped forward, stopping Phichit from even suggesting the deal was at its end. “I may not be able to leave with him, but who will stop me from sneaking on board one night and taking him while you all sleep, hm?”

“And who’s to say I can’t do the same?” Phichit asked, smiling as JJ’s brows dropped. “If you steal our captive, we can do the same. I’m sure there’s someone out there you care fondly about, like a lover, or…” His eyes drop to the gold band around his finger. “A wife, perhaps?”

JJ’s eyes darkened, fingers itching to reach for his sword. “Don’t you dare touch my wife,” he threatened.

“Then don’t go near my captive.”

JJ never replied and Phichit turned away, facing the window where the sun was beginning to set. He assumed no deal made was a good thing. The kid should remain safe on board the ship and JJ knew the risks of trying to deceive them. He was proud to get this far, but he wasn’t sure exactly how to move on.

He needed JJ off the ship. That was a start, but as he turned, the man appeared determined to remain where he stood.

“Standing there isn’t going to change my mind,” Phichit explained, exhausted that he was still trying. “I’m sure you care deeply about your wife, so for her sake, I suggest you leave before I change my mind. I’m giving you a chance here. Don’t waste it.”

“Fine,” JJ snapped. “I’ll let you keep the little Prince, but if you threaten my wife again, I won’t be so willing to step away next time.”

And then the rival turned, stalking away from Phichit who smiled with pride.

It was too easy to use his wife as a pawn. He wasn’t going to take her. He didn’t even know what the woman looked like, but it worked against JJ’s purpose and he was gone. He was finally leaving their ship on the small boat he arrived in, rowing away from an opportunity he couldn’t win.

Phichit wanted to laugh. There he stood on his Captain’s ship, watching a rival Captain drop a deal to protect the person he loved, and all Phichit could think was how love was a weakness. It was a burden, something that could destroy a person – an offer, in JJ’s case. It gave reason for manipulation, and Phichit swore long ago to never fall in love.

But then he would look at Yuuri and Victor, and his opinion swayed. They were two people desperately in love, yet they never dragged each other down. They gave each other strength and support. They would do anything to protect each other, and Phichit wondered for a moment if love was really a weakness, or the strongest, bravest thing a person can do.

Whatever the answer, Victor and Yuuri gave each other strength. That was something Phichit was certain on.

 

* * *

_ The challenge was dumb. It was stupid and ridiculous and completely meaningless when Yuuri looked at the bigger picture. _

_ It didn’t take long before he realized it. When Victor made the suggestion, it sounded fun. Yuuri liked the idea of riling Victor up enough that he can’t help but act recklessly and kiss him. He had daydreams about it. But where the idea sounded entertaining, Yuuri wondered why they chose to torture themselves this way – and with something they could do even as a couple. _

_ Nothing stopped them from doing exactly this while also being lovers. He supposed it took the fun out of it, but so did knowing how they felt. Whether they were lovers or not, they liked each other, and this ‘competition’ they put themselves in was just delaying the inevitable. _

_ But still, Yuuri tried hard not to worry. It wasn’t like it would never happen because eventually, one of them would give in, and he didn’t intend on it being him. _

_ Victor just made it very hard. _

_ It was clear he wanted Yuuri to lose. He tried harder, putting more effort into making sure Yuuri looked his way. The occasional pose he purposefully pulled caught Yuuri’s stare, so much he feared the crew would notice too – but they didn’t. He would smile at Yuuri so beautifully, and whisper soft words in his ears when the world was silent. _

_ He even dragged Yuuri off the ship one night without permission from the Captain, just to take him somewhere in the harbour town they docked at; “like a date,” so Victor said with a wink. _

_ And Yuuri didn’t help himself because he didn’t protest. He let Victor take his hand, fingers linked tightly as he dragged Yuuri through the town and into a building he didn’t recognise – but he did identify the strong scent of alcohol. He noticed the drunken men and roaring laughter before he realized where Victor took him. _

_ Yuuri was a fool. He was a thoughtless, reckless fool who was going to lose. _

_ “Of all the places you could have taken me to…” Yuuri sighed, but still didn’t protest as Victor dragged him further inside. _

_ “I suppose I have my reasons for bringing you here, not that I’d admit them,” Victor told him, the sly grin on his face tempting to kiss away, but no. He had more self-control than that. “So, I say we should drink some rum, have a little fun, and enjoy ourselves before Captain Katsuki chases us down with swords and pistols in his hands.” _

_ The mental image had Yuuri shiver, and suddenly the smell of alcohol wasn’t so bad. _

_ Then there was a drink in his face, and behind it was a smile that set his heart alight, warm and comforting as he took the drink from Victor’s grasp and returned the grin. Challenge or not, it was hard not to give up all self-control and kiss Victor already. _

_ But no. It may be tempting but he was still a stubborn pirate, unwilling to be the first to give in. _

_ The first drink went down with a few coughs and splutters, but he finished it with the intentions of grabbing another, and Yuuri downed the different-tasting drink in record time. If his father were to arrive and drag them back to the ship, he’d rather not waste his time. _

_ And he was on his who-knows how many drinks when he realized Victor was still on his second, maybe, and Yuuri had a knife in his hand that he couldn’t remember grabbing. _

_ He looked around a little dazed, mind buzzing from the alcohol. He couldn’t remember moving. He was unsure how he made it across the room as he swayed side to side, sat down by himself and wondering where Victor disappeared to. He was beside him moments ago? _

_ But then he found him, sat down across the room with a drink in hand. _

_ Yuuri smiled, the stupid grin on his face burning his cheeks. Victor was so great, and beautiful, and everything so perfect about a human being. He wanted to kiss him. He wanted to touch him and hold him and proudly tell people Victor was his. _

_ Why he agreed to the challenge, he had no clue. But if watching Victor sit alone had Yuuri wish to kiss him, he had no hope. _

_ But Victor wasn’t alone. _

_ There was suddenly a woman standing there, an arm around his shoulder and a finger beneath his chin, tilting his head to meet her flirtatious gaze. _

_ He shouldn’t care. It wasn’t like he and Victor were together anyway. Yuuri shouldn’t be so possessive over someone he’s only ever admitted his feelings for once, but his stomach lurched at the sight; his heart ached with need, wishing to replace the woman with himself. Her touches were his. She had no right to assume he wasn’t taken or loved by somebody else. _

_ And with a frustrated huff, Yuuri stood to his feet a little too fast. The room spun for a moment until he blinked away the blur, and with a firm face he stormed onwards. _

_ It might have been the alcohol talking, or Yuuri was finally the first to break, but not a single ounce of his nerves made him hesitate. He cared too much to watch Victor be seduced by a stranger, a woman unworthy of his love. His eyes should only be on him. _

_ And screw the competition. There was no point in waiting. One of them had to act, and if that meant kissing Victor, it wasn’t a loss. _

_ “Yuuri?” Victor asked when their eyes met, but Yuuri didn’t say a word. _

_ He nudged the woman aside, coming between them as a hand cupped Victor’s cheek. And with compulsive recklessness, Yuuri kissed those soft lips for the first time. _

_ He expected it to be quick – a short experimental peck to check Victor wanted this too, but it was slow and sweet. Their lips lingered, Victor’s hand reaching up to curl around Yuuri’s neck, and the sounds around him melted away into a muted blur, leaving only Victor in his sights, his mind. _

_ Even as he pulled back, the world didn’t return. Victor’s touch stayed. His lips left a tingle on Yuuri’s own, tempting him to kiss Victor again, but he didn’t. He just wished to appreciate this for a little while, admire the soft glow on Victor’s cheeks and tender smile on his lips. _

_ “What was that for?” Victor asked laughing, like it was the best thing to ever happen to him. _

_ “I’m drunk,” was all Yuuri said. _

_ Victor laughed, loud and brilliantly, warming Yuuri’s heart with the tempting allure to kiss him again, but he didn’t. He watched Victor for a moment, appreciating who he kissed and why Victor meant so much to him – then his question repeated in his mind, and Yuuri had a coherent answer. _

_ “We’re idiots,” he stated perhaps a little too firmly when Victor’s smile dropped. “I don’t know why we challenged ourselves to keep prolonging this for fun when we could just take action and enjoy ourselves even more. Why should I restrain my need to kiss you?” _

_ Victor smiled softly. “Because the teasing was fun.” _

_ “But kissing you was even better.” _

_ Then Victor didn’t say anything. He searched Yuuri’s eyes like he was trying to decide if he was right, that they were idiots prolonging the inevitable. But it was almost as if he was searching for the truth in Yuuri’s words, like he doubted them for a moment until his smile brightened. _

_ “You’re an enigma, Katsuki Yuuri,” Victor said, taking Yuuri’s head in his hands. “And don’t you ever change if we’re going to be lovers. I can’t keep reminding myself things because you decided being you isn’t enough.” _

_ Yuuri blinked. He wanted to laugh, to cry, to scream out into the crowd in pure delight because he had Victor’s heart. He had his life and love in his hands, Yuuri’s to cherish and protect from all the harm in the world. Victor was the perfect treasure, and this time, Yuuri didn’t hold back. _

_ He kissed Victor again – their second one, a kiss with a lifetime worth to follow. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's early only because I wrote a big chunk of this in the last chapter, but moved it into this
> 
> I also have something to say.
> 
> This has crossed my mind almost every time I've updated this fic since Chapter 3/4. Almost every single time, and I've reached the point where I think I might stop updating for a while.
> 
> I absolutely adore this fic. It's been so fun to write and imagine what shenanigans these boys get up to. Writing this fic has been fun... but updating hasn't. 
> 
> I know people say to write for yourself, and I am. It's why I began writing this after ranting and raving about it for a year. But something people don't ever mention is about posting it online, handing it over for the world to read and judge. I can write for myself, but the second I post this and offer it out for people to read, that's where things get discouraging.
> 
> Because It's seeing that nobody reads fics unless they're finished, then looking at your 60k+ fic knowing it's not going to be finished for a while, and knowing that's not a guarantee that anyone will read it when it's finished. It's being so excited about your idea and shouting it out to people, but receiving no response. It's feeling like your self-worth as a writer is insignificant, because your fic is just a passing thought.
> 
> I know I shouldn't expect people to read. There's no obligation. I know that. I also know that I should write fics for myself. I know that too. It shouldn't be about stats, or hits, but I just enjoy the engagement between author and reader, and it still aches a little seeing an idea I love so much not receive the same reception from others.
> 
> I'm just sad, guys. I'm sorry if I sound petty and ungrateful to everyone who has read and commented and loved it from the outskirts. You've all been the only reason why I've continued to keep posting, but I've reached a point where if it keeps getting me down, maybe I should help myself and do something about it.
> 
> I'll still be writing this in my own time. Maybe in a month or so, I'll start posting again. Or maybe I'll get over myself in a week or so and just keep up with m schedule like before. (Which seems likely because I tend to go back on my word sometimes. I'm a mess, honestly). But I don't know. I plan to just...
> 
> I don't want to say give up, but it feels like I am.
> 
> Thank you if you've read this far. Thank you for commenting if you have, or kudosing, or just opening the fic because you're curious. I know it's a bit of a mess; there's a lot to unpack, but it's been fun. Maybe I'll see you all next week again for the usual chapter update, or in a few months, but you'll eventually see the finished product of this fic.
> 
> That's a promise.

**Author's Note:**

> Follow my Tumblr!  
> [Click here!](http://axlaida.tumblr.com)  
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> [Click here!](https://twitter.com/Axlaida)  
> 


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